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am I wasting my time, does he actually like me? watch

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    I need advice guys, me and this lad have been friends for years, and we have been in a relationship for 4 months now but he rarely has time for me. He's never had a girlfriend before me, so he's always just been going out with his lad mates, but that seems to be all he does. He's busy with work in week, and I'm at college anyway but He never asks me to do anything with him, and when I do we just stay at his, and this happens like 3 times a week if I'm lucky. it's always me asking when I'm next seeing him, and it's getting me down knowing that there are days when I could see him for a couple of hours, but he is never enthusiastic about it. He's never going out of his way to try and see me, which makes me wonder if he's actually bothered. I've spoke to him about how I feel, and he tells me that he's just really bad at arranging plans and that he's never had someone to see all the time before, so it's weird for him and I understand that. I also am insecure about myself, I'm constantly thinking he can do better which doesn't help either. I know it's not good, but I need him in my life. I depend on him with a lot of things, and I would be broken if I was to lose him. I love him, someone give me some advice on what to do? My friend told me to stop being the one to ask him if I'm seeing him, and wait till he asks me and see how long it takes, but I can't. I give in 😂 Helpppp
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I need advice guys, me and this lad have been friends for years, and we have been in a relationship for 4 months now but he rarely has time for me. He's never had a girlfriend before me, so he's always just been going out with his lad mates, but that seems to be all he does. He's busy with work in week, and I'm at college anyway but He never asks me to do anything with him, and when I do we just stay at his, and this happens like 3 times a week if I'm lucky. it's always me asking when I'm next seeing him, and it's getting me down knowing that there are days when I could see him for a couple of hours, but he is never enthusiastic about it. He's never going out of his way to try and see me, which makes me wonder if he's actually bothered. I've spoke to him about how I feel, and he tells me that he's just really bad at arranging plans and that he's never had someone to see all the time before, so it's weird for him and I understand that. I also am insecure about myself, I'm constantly thinking he can do better which doesn't help either. I know it's not good, but I need him in my life. I depend on him with a lot of things, and I would be broken if I was to lose him. I love him, someone give me some advice on what to do? My friend told me to stop being the one to ask him if I'm seeing him, and wait till he asks me and see how long it takes, but I can't. I give in 😂 Helpppp

    Hey

    First of all, I'm a gay guy so this may not be the best advice or even relevant. However, guys be them gay or straight tend to behave in the exact way this chap of yours is behaving. Guys are not good communicators, especially ones who have never had a relationship before. Equally, please don't let his lack of enthusiasm make you feel bad about yourself; it is too easy to identify yourself as the root of the problem when guys don't show interest. Please don't give into that temptation, it is a slippery slope to unhappiness.

    I do think you're friend has some good advice for you there. If I were you, I would play it cool, even though you clearly have strong feelings for him, and let him chase after you a little. It is always important to make sure you have your own life when in a relationship and to not have your entire world revolve around your partner. Spend some time with your friends, have fun! It will help you forget about him a little. And, if you have your own life and don't message him the whole time he will probably pick up on that and reach out to you.

    If you manage to play it cool and hold off from messaging him and he doesn't chase you, then he's not worth your time or your tears. I know you probably won't listen to me on that point, but it is 100% true.

    You should be thinking how lucky this guy is to have YOU, not the other way round.
    Think of all the other guys who might be interested in you? Haha

    Chin up, listen to some righteous music and remember how great you are!
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    (Original post by FRSPGrad72)
    Hey

    First of all, I'm a gay guy so this may not be the best advice or even relevant. However, guys be them gay or straight tend to behave in the exact way this chap of yours is behaving. Guys are not good communicators, especially ones who have never had a relationship before. Equally, please don't let his lack of enthusiasm make you feel bad about yourself; it is too easy to identify yourself as the root of the problem when guys don't show interest. Please don't give into that temptation, it is a slippery slope to unhappiness.

    I do think you're friend has some good advice for you there. If I were you, I would play it cool, even though you clearly have strong feelings for him, and let him chase after you a little. It is always important to make sure you have your own life when in a relationship and to not have your entire world revolve around your partner. Spend some time with your friends, have fun! It will help you forget about him a little. And, if you have your own life and don't message him the whole time he will probably pick up on that and reach out to you.

    If you manage to play it cool and hold off from messaging him and he doesn't chase you, then he's not worth your time or your tears. I know you probably won't listen to me on that point, but it is 100% true.

    You should be thinking how lucky this guy is to have YOU, not the other way round.
    Think of all the other guys who might be interested in you? Haha

    Chin up, listen to some righteous music and remember how great you are!
    I couldn't of asked for a better response, you have made me feel 100 times better, Thankyou so much! I am definitely going to try and play it cool, and distance myself a little to see if he does reach out for me, hopefully he does. Thankyou ever so much again! You're amazing x
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    Hard to say, one way of finding out is to ease up on the eagerness and stop suggesting when to go out, see what he does.
 
 
 
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