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    So, basically, I am panicking I found out one of my best friends brother is living at home again.
    A bit on background about us, basically I lost my virginity to him about 5 years ago, he is 7 years older than me, then he left for uni the next day and haven't seen or spoke to him since. I'm worried that I'm going to see him or speak to him.
    I'm normally quite chilled about seeing ex's but have recently broken up with a guy and am worried I'll do something stupid, but was never in a relationship with him and worried about my friends reaction to our awkwardness.
    I want some advice on what to say to him if I see him and how to avoid him at parties etc, and how to make it less awkward.
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    So if he went to uni, you were 11 :O, I hope not
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    (Original post by IronicalMan)
    So if he went to uni, you were 11 :O, I hope not
    Sadly yes
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    If you bump into him, just ask him how he's doing and what he's been up to. Then make an excuse to go the bathroom or something and keep your distance from him by engaging and mingling with other people at the party. Just do your own thing.

    So you had sex when you were 11?
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    (Original post by Nimrahk123)
    Sadly yes
    Not that it's worth anything now but you do realise that means he raped you?

    Tbh I would just try to avoid seeing him. Just because you see your best friend doesn't mean you're going to see the brother.
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    (Original post by sameehaiqbal)
    If you bump into him, just ask him how he's doing and what he's been up to. Then make an excuse to go the bathroom or something and keep your distance from him by engaging and mingling with other people at the party. Just do your own thing.

    So you had sex when you were 11?
    Yeah, I made mistakes like everyone else. And thanks for the advice
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    (Original post by Nimrahk123)
    Yeah, I made mistakes like everyone else. And thanks for the advice
    Okay, I was just confirming to get a better understanding of what happened. I'm not judging you or anything xx
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    (Original post by BakedPotatoast)
    Not that it's worth anything now but you do realise that means he raped you?

    Tbh I would just try to avoid seeing him. Just because you see your best friend doesn't mean you're going to see the brother.
    I realised that a bit too late. And When I try to avoid people I seem to see them all the time.
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    Dont sweat it he probably has a gf now. Btw he probably be ashamed of what he did and feel awkward talking to you
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    (Original post by bluesunboy)
    Dont sweat it he probably has a gf now. Btw he probably be ashamed of what he did and feel awkward talking to you
    Thanks, I hope so
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    (Original post by Nimrahk123)
    Sadly yes
    WTF, YOU WERE 11, HE RAPED YOU, EVEN IF YOU WANTED IT(WHICH I DOUBT AT 11) IT'S STILL RAPE!.18 year old ****ing an 11 year old, wtf is wrong with him srs. I mean I am attracted to a younger girl, 3 years younger than me but 11 is proper taking the piss, that actually makes him a pedophile, please tell someone?
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    (Original post by IronicalMan)
    WTF, YOU WERE 11, HE RAPED YOU, EVEN IF YOU WANTED IT(WHICH I DOUBT AT 11) IT'S STILL RAPE!.18 year old ****ing an 11 year old, wtf is wrong with him srs. I mean I am attracted to a younger girl, 3 years younger than me but 11 is proper taking the piss, that actually makes him a pedophile, please tell someone?
    I don't think it matters anymore, I mean we can't change the past and I was like those 11 year olds who tried to act 18, so I do t really think it matters anymore. But it was wrong completely in that situation I think you're right in other situations.
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    (Original post by Nimrahk123)
    I don't think it matters anymore, I mean we can't change the past and I was like those 11 year olds who tried to act 18, so I do t really think it matters anymore. But it was wrong completely in that situation I think you're right in other situations.
    Do your parents know, I think you should tell them, at least your mother. Do you feel raped like scared or anything, or are you okay?
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    (Original post by IronicalMan)
    Do your parents know, I think you should tell them, at least your mother. Do you feel raped like scared or anything, or are you okay?
    Well, I'm fine now tbh it wasn't like I was scared then or anything. And my parents would kill me if that was the case, as Muslims they'll still think it was partially my fault, as I was probably was not allowed to go to that party anyway. Honestly, I think the past is over, and aren't really concerned about what happened then, but am worried more about the future in seeing him etc .
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    (Original post by Nimrahk123)
    Well, I'm fine now tbh it wasn't like I was scared then or anything. And my parents would kill me if that was the case, as Muslims they'll still think it was partially my fault, as I was probably was not allowed to go to that party anyway. Honestly, I think the past is over, and aren't really concerned about what happened then, but am worried more about the future in seeing him etc .
    **** me yeah don't, coz you're muslim I think that would open up a tin of worms, is he muslim?, surely that's haram for him then.................... Though probably best not to speak to family/anyone in the community, but there are organizations you can speak to if you feel like you're repressing it, not trying to sound patronizing here, I know boys mature quicker than girls but christ, I can't imagine an 11 year old wanting it.
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    (Original post by IronicalMan)
    **** me yeah don't, coz you're muslim I think that would open up a tin of worms, is he muslim?, surely that's haram for him then.................... Though probably best not to speak to family/anyone in the community, but there are organizations you can speak to if you feel like you're repressing it, not trying to sound patronizing here, I know boys mature quicker than girls but christ, I can't imagine an 11 year old wanting it.
    He wasn't Muslim, and there aren't actually many Muslims in my community so not worried about that, but 11 year old me thought I was so big that I probably wanted it to just disobey my parents, though they'll never know about it.
 
 
 
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