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    I was fired today (well I guess technically yesterday because it's past midnight but whatever) and I'm really gutted, mostly because I just don't think I deserve it. It was a job in a small café and I'd worked there for 5 months. Here's what happened:

    I was serving a regular customer (let's call him Jim). He comes maybe once every couple of weeks and normally he's quite friendly and chatty, and today was no different. Except there were these two boys there, couldn't have been any older than 15, sitting together and holding hands, and Jim pointed to them and said (really loudly) 'Bit young to be f*gs aren't you?'
    Now I was shocked because I'd never heard anyone say anything like that, especially to kids, and because I just had no idea what to do. In the end I pointed out the sign on the wall that says we don't tolerate foul language or abuse towards staff or other customers, and Jim replied by saying it wasn't abuse or bad language. At this point I was really stuck, I hate situations like that. I was half tempted to let it go just to avoid the whole thing, but I glanced at the boys and they looked so embarrassed and worried. So I calmly asked Jim to either apologise to them or leave the café. And he stormed out (without paying for his stuff), muttering that he was never going to step foot inside a place that served 'homos'. I gave the kids a free drink on the house both for their troubles.
    As it turned out, my manager had seen the ENTIRE thing, and she wasn't happy at how I'd dealt with it. She said I should have ignored what Jim said, and certainly shouldn't have given the boys free drinks for a mistake another customer made. She said that I'd lost us a regular customer and that I should be ashamed of myself, and fired me on the spot, in front of quite a few customers too.
    Maybe I could have dealt with it better but surely I shouldn't have been fired? I'm embarrassed, and I'm guessing my manager won't give me a good reference so it's going to suck finding a new job...
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    I think it's good that you stood up for the boys - after all, homophobia is totally wrong and it shouldn't be accepted anywhere, nevermind in a public place. I don't think you should have been fired, and I myself would be annoyed if I was in your position, as I would have done the same thing, and you dealt with it in a mature way. You definitely weren't in the wrong here.

    I know it sucks you have to find a new job now, but if it's any consolation, I have no doubt you did the right thing. It shows you have good morals, and can empathise - something which a lot of people today seem to lack

    Good luck in the future - unfortunately, things happen sometimes but a new job will come along soon
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    IMO, you aren't in the wrong here. It really wasn't nice for 'Jim' to say that since it's none of his business and what you did was commendable (or rather normal in an ideal world).

    If the boss is that stingy then if I were you I'd probably have paid for the drinks for the kids but its nothing to fire an employee over...
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    Firstly, I'd just like to say that what you did was the right thing. It's now considered a hate crime to do something like that, and your ex manager is skating on thin ice, by doing anything other than backing you up.

    But that might be a tough one. It would depend on what it says in your contract, and whether or not it's a large firm or independent cafe. If it's independent, there's not a great deal anyone can do about it, unless you have a ton of witnesses willing to come forward. Even then, would you really want your job back after that?

    If it's a large company, there are a lot more legal steps in place to protect you, but you'd still need some small amount of evidence to back it up. This is where your contract comes in. If the contract states (and they usually do) that you have a 6 month period (they all call it something different but it amounts to the same), your employer has the right to terminate your contract before this period is up, and they don't need a good reason. Because you only worked for them 5 months, employment wise, you're out of luck. What they did, no matter how wrong, is still legal.

    However, being a large company, that manager has a boss. So even though what happened is legal, you can get in contact with head office and explain what happened. You never know, maybe head office will be equally as shocked and act on it, and you might even be lucky enough to be given the position back. At the very least, you could get that manager fired. If head office don't act on it, you can always take it to the local paper. You wont get your job back that way I'm afraid, but you'd at least get justice. They'd rather fire the manager for gross misconduct than get a bad rep.

    In any case, I highly recommend getting in contact with your local citizens advice, they can provide much better advice than you can get here.

    As for a reference, no you wont get one, but they can't give you a bad one either; all they can do is refuse. Though even that can sound a little off putting to a new employer. I had a problem with a bad manager myself (I quit before things got hairy though), and what I did was simply not put that job on my CV or future applications. I've never been asked by new employers about it, and I've had jobs since, so I wouldn't worry about that side of it.

    I hope this was of some help.
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    No. Don't feel embarassed for sticking up for those boys. You did the right thing and also your manager should be aware of "Treating everyone equally" etc. Tbh, if that was you I'd have an anxiety attack and probably go hide in the back or something 😅 But I'm glad you stuck to your guns. Kudos to you! And also, the reference thing, when applying for a new job, explain to your new/potential manager about this story, this will make you look more attractive in terms of your qualities i guess. Or if that doesn't work out, just apply for some voluntary jobs just for the time being. Again, please don't be embarassed for doing the right thing. 😊
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    Sounds like you did the right thing for sure. Besides, if your manager fires you over what I'd consider to be stellar customer service, she doesn't deserve your talent :007:
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    What you did was ****ing amazing. Please do everything in your power to get that manager fired.
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    (Original post by justforthis1)
    I was fired today (well I guess technically yesterday because it's past midnight but whatever) and I'm really gutted, mostly because I just don't think I deserve it. It was a job in a small café and I'd worked there for 5 months. Here's what happened:

    I was serving a regular customer (let's call him Jim). He comes maybe once every couple of weeks and normally he's quite friendly and chatty, and today was no different. Except there were these two boys there, couldn't have been any older than 15, sitting together and holding hands, and Jim pointed to them and said (really loudly) 'Bit young to be f*gs aren't you?'
    Now I was shocked because I'd never heard anyone say anything like that, especially to kids, and because I just had no idea what to do. In the end I pointed out the sign on the wall that says we don't tolerate foul language or abuse towards staff or other customers, and Jim replied by saying it wasn't abuse or bad language. At this point I was really stuck, I hate situations like that. I was half tempted to let it go just to avoid the whole thing, but I glanced at the boys and they looked so embarrassed and worried. So I calmly asked Jim to either apologise to them or leave the café. And he stormed out (without paying for his stuff), muttering that he was never going to step foot inside a place that served 'homos'. I gave the kids a free drink on the house both for their troubles.
    As it turned out, my manager had seen the ENTIRE thing, and she wasn't happy at how I'd dealt with it. She said I should have ignored what Jim said, and certainly shouldn't have given the boys free drinks for a mistake another customer made. She said that I'd lost us a regular customer and that I should be ashamed of myself, and fired me on the spot, in front of quite a few customers too.
    Maybe I could have dealt with it better but surely I shouldn't have been fired? I'm embarrassed, and I'm guessing my manager won't give me a good reference so it's going to suck finding a new job...
    Firing a staff member publicly in front of the customers or even other employees is never acceptable. The decision to terminate somebody should always be communicated in private and given reasonable thought, there is no excuse for firing somebody in the heat of the moment without taking time to see both sides of a situation. I've dealt with a similar situation to this as a duty manager before, a racist lady telling one of my bartenders to "**** off home" and various other racist insults. I informed her that if she didn't apologise I would have the police evict her from the building and blacklist her from attending the place again in future. We also refused her service for the rest of the night. We should always back each other up to the fullest extent in the workplace, it's something I feel strongly about.

    I personally would never worry about losing a "regular customer" if they're actions are causing a problem. If you let him get away with it, you keep one customer at the possible expense of how many other customers? How many people would those boys tell about their experience that would avoid the place like the plague because of it? How many other customers that saw it would just not return and warn friends against going in there? How many future incidents could Jim cause if the behaviour went unchecked? What if he directs a homophobic or racist slur at someone in the future and they kick his head in as he walks out the door or stick a knife in him? The media coverage will make you the number one place to avoid in the whole town.

    Servers have the right to refuse service where there are sufficient grounds for doing so, and you absolutely made the right decision. I know it's hard to take getting fired, but you were in the right here, try not to lose any sleep over it. Good luck with the job search.
 
 
 
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