I live with my long term partner in a two bedroom house in a suburban area- although the area is very rough around the edges, it's low-cost affordable living- but the point is, I live with my partner's best friend and my partners brother (whom incidentally is dating her best mate).
The problem is, her best friend doesn't like me- due to our fall out's and how I've treated her in the past (long story short; I was going through mental health issues and it tarnished our relationship). Because we live together her best mate is civil to me, and we talk but it's very surface level- and she's also very very sarcastic with a dry wit. Oftentimes, it causes offence- as she's somewhat cold toward me and indifferent to any issues I bring to the table.
Now, on to her brother- he is a bit 'holier than thou' or likes to think so- can be opinionated and doesn't like hearing other people's views. By this, I mean he dismisses you in a passive way. He likes the sound of his own voice, and only thinks his opinion is valid. As soon as I add comment, he shifts gears and then turns it into something else- rarely if at all, can we agree.
He cannot be wrong. Add to this, he makes remarks about the housework chores, and says I never wash up- and has told my partner that behind my back- stating I need to "be taught how to wash up as [us three] are the only ones that seem to bother". He fails to realise that actually I wash up, usually he is out. Many times, I've washed the kitchen to the point of scrubbing the sides and cooker top- and not a word is mentioned when I do.
I'm in a situation where I cannot upset any of them, because my partner is inevitably close to them- and while she's stuck up for me, she let's things slip and its getting to me.
Today I put my clothes in the dryer around 9am-ish (he's usually up at this point), and I came in around 10.30am to find my clothes were damp, so he'd obviously just turned it off mid cycle. He always makes remarks about the quality of washing up, and openly asked me: "Just wondering when you or [partner] were going to do some washing up?".
He swans about like he's head of house- when actually it was initially supposed to be a house for me and partner- not him and her best mate. The only reason they are both here is because she let them live here until they found a place.
This isn't even including the fact that I avoid going to see her parents at all costs, because her Dad is unbearably selfish and always talks about his own issues and is sarcastic to the point its dry humour and he is offensive.
There was a situation in which I was almost hurt, and while my partner was with me, she was away from danger. When she told him about it, he immediately asked her if she was okay- and didn't even bother to acknowledge the fact I was in the face of danger and remained largely indifferent to that. Basically lacked compassion - which is exactly how her brother is.
What advice would you offer to me?
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