Turn on thread page Beta

How much to spend on someone you've dated for four months for bday watch

Announcements
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    When I say we are dating, we are just that. We are exclusive but haven't put the 'relationship' label on it yet.

    It's his birthday in a couple of weeks and I don't know the correct etiquette with this sort of thing. I'm used to being very thoughtful with presents but I don't want it to look like I put TOO much thought into it or spent too much because it might just look weird. I mean I don't know if some people would even bother with a present?

    My original thought was some of his favourite cologne (small 30ml) and a scented candle (he likes them lol), which would add up to about £35 but I dunno if it's a bit OTT.

    Any tips?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    What's the going rate for comdoms these days?

    Spoiler:
    Show
    Joking aside, I'd say anywhere between £30-£50 is enough.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    Bump
    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    I think that would be okay, you won't have spent a huge amount but it shows you care. If you're exclusive that's a little more than casual dating where you probably wouldn't get a gift.
    • TSR Support Team
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    I think that would be absolutely fine. And you know what? I'd rather someone put too much thought into something than put no thought into it at all. He should appreciate your thoughtfulness, not be put off by it

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    I would pick one or the other. The biggest issue with spending £20+ is if the other person feels it was expensive they may feel pressured to reciprocate on your birthday when they don't have the money / don't want to spend that much.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by monkyvirus)
    I would pick one or the other. The biggest issue with spending £20+ is if the other person feels it was expensive they may feel pressured to reciprocate on your birthday when they don't have the money / don't want to spend that much.
    Yeah it's my birthday like the week after but in all honesty he will most likely forget and I'm just accepting that. Just because he will probably forget doesn't mean I don't wanna get him something :lol: . But I totally know what you're saying.*

    Plus we are long distance and it just happens we are together on his bday but not mine so he has an excuse ish :-P

    **
    (Original post by Changing Skies)
    I think that would be absolutely fine. And you know what? I'd rather someone put too much thought into something than put no thought into it at all. He should appreciate your thoughtfulness, not be put off by it

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    That's my thinking too but men can be weird ;-)*
    (Original post by doodle_333)
    I think that would be okay, you won't have spent a huge amount but it shows you care. If you're exclusive that's a little more than casual dating where you probably wouldn't get a gift.
    (Original post by 34908seikj)
    What's the going rate for comdoms these days?

    Spoiler:
    Show
    Joking aside, I'd say anywhere between £30-£50 is enough.
    Thanks guys.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    This doesn't require a thread on TSR.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Mancini)
    This doesn't require a thread on TSR.
    How does it not? I wanted advice on something related to relationships. As far as I am aware that is what the forums are for - advice and questions.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Airfairy)
    How does it not? I wanted advice on something related to relationships. As far as I am aware that is what the forums are for - advice and questions.
    In your mind you actually think you must seek out for advice on how much to spend on someone you are seeing /dating ? Hmm.

    The fact that you actually have to ask such a thing tells me this person is not very important to you.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Mancini)
    In your mind you actually think you must seek out for advice on how much to spend on someone you are seeing /dating ? Hmm.

    The fact that you actually have to ask such a thing tells me this person is not very important to you.
    quite the opposite. I don't want to spend too much and freak him out if anything.*
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    Timeline isn't as relevant as how much time you spend together tbh, a 3 month relationship with someone you see everyday is probably much further on than a year relationship with someone you see twice a month...

    (not relevant)
    YOU haven't put the relationship label on it? Sounds like it's entirely up to you?*

    You're not sure he's feeling it or you're not sure you're feeling it? Enlighten me *
    • Community Assistant
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    Community Assistant
    What you buy is far more important than how much you spend. Buying something you know he would like is better than spending lots of money on junk.

    Don't spend an amount he would be uncomfortable reciprocating though. By all means spoil if you want but don't make him feel like he will have to spend the same on you, especially if he won't be able to.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by dmz)
    Timeline isn't as relevant as how much time you spend together tbh, a 3 month relationship with someone you see everyday is probably much further on than a year relationship with someone you see twice a month...

    (not relevant)
    YOU haven't put the relationship label on it? Sounds like it's entirely up to you?*

    You're not sure he's feeling it or you're not sure you're feeling it? Enlighten me *
    Not me personally. We talked about it and said we wanted to exclusively date for a while first. I'd be fine with using the 'relationship' term, I think it scares him though. Mind you, the last time we talked about it was a few months ago. May be time to talk about it again.*
    Offline

    16
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Airfairy)
    When I say we are dating, we are just that. We are exclusive but haven't put the 'relationship' label on it yet.

    It's his birthday in a couple of weeks and I don't know the correct etiquette with this sort of thing. I'm used to being very thoughtful with presents but I don't want it to look like I put TOO much thought into it or spent too much because it might just look weird. I mean I don't know if some people would even bother with a present?

    My original thought was some of his favourite cologne (small 30ml) and a scented candle (he likes them lol), which would add up to about £35 but I dunno if it's a bit OTT.

    Any tips?
    10% of a month wages so for me that's £500 on average
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    What you've came up with seems fine to me.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: July 18, 2016
Poll
Do you think parents should charge rent?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.