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    Hi guys,

    How long does it take you to turn someoneyou met randomly into a relationship? I know this varies and I would like to hear your experience/opinion.

    I met a girl at a shop and exchanged numbers. I apparently like her more than she likes me. It's been about a month now and I texted her a couple of times a week before I went on a 2-weeks holiday. Then during the holiday, we wrote each other emails 3 times, and then when I came back, we had an unprecdented 20-min long call. Note - I made the initiatives every time.

    A thread regarding this story(different question) was posted once before and now I am just not sure if this will happen or not. I have never had a gf who I met randomly like this. I don't see how texts/emails will help the matter and I don't want to call her nor arrange meetups much at this stage as it may cause negative effects.

    There is not much I can do and I would greatly appreciate if you can suggest some ideas.

    Cheers
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    Keep chatting to her?

    Why don't you want to meet up with her? Surely that is the next logical step..
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    (Original post by randomgirl)
    Keep chatting to her?

    Why don't you want to meet up with her? Surely that is the next logical step..
    Thanks for the reply.

    I did propose to meet up twice or so before but they all happened to be cancelled by her for some reason. I thought it was finished but she did email me and suggest to know me more through emails.

    So I think she wants to find out more about me more but I just don't like emails/texts for exchanging messages for this matter, especially when we are in the same city.

    Next proposal to meet up must be of a good timing. Again, even she did sound a little active in her emails and that we talked for 20 min last time(always less than 5min before), I am still not sure about the outcome or her current state of mind. Her reactions to me are in contradiction in logic and I just cann't figure them out.

    What do you think?
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    Sounds like shes not interested but is probably flattered by the interest. If there doesn't seem to be much interest from her, then you aren't going to be able to create it yourself. Find someone else who is interested in you rather than wasting your time with this girl.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi guys,

    How long does it take you to turn someoneyou met randomly into a relationship? I know this varies and I would like to hear your experience/opinion.
    Personally I would never engage in a relationship with someone I met randomly or someone that I didnt know very well.
    And as the poster above said she may have just been flattered. Theres quite a difference between just chatting to someone politely and giving them your number and actually wanting to embark on a relationship.
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    I don't have many opportunities to meet girls from my current work circle. However I was hoping that suggestion to get to know me more is a sign of possibilities of further development. I don't like waiting for someone like this and have no experience for it either. But as said above, she might be flattered, and I am probably the one making effort to make it happen.

    It is very frustrating. To be honest, I don't like the idea of pursueing someone but if this is the step that has to be taken for, I will do it this time(I know you can feel the desperation in this paragraph..).

    It is clear that people in general, girls in particular, are reluctant to make close friendships or more with randomers. But I don't understand why she would propose to send me more emails? I would see it as she was a little interested, not sure if I am trustworthy(could be a pimp, human traffic ring worker, strategic rapist or more), aware of my intention, and offering a chance for more? Am I correct here?

    Many thanks
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    But I don't understand why she would propose to send me more emails?
    Emails are essentially nothing more than words on a screen. Its easy to distance yourself from them, and unless they are to/from someone you have feelings for they are very impersonal. If you dont know the person especially its not like your really talking to anyone, your just repsonding to something.

    Replying to emails doesnt really mean anything, so dont pin your hopes on that.
    I reply to messages I get on myspace and things like that out of politness or boredom more than anything, Its generally not because I have any real interest in the person.

    Unless she is giving you any clear signs thats she is interested (ie says we should meet up some time) I wouldnt become to fixated on it. Either make your feelings clear and ask her where she stands, or take it very slowly and just see where this goes.
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    (Original post by louisedotcom)
    Personally I would never engage in a relationship with someone I met randomly or someone that I didnt know very well.
    And as the poster above said she may have just been flattered. Theres quite a difference between just chatting to someone politely and giving them your number and actually wanting to embark on a relationship.
    True :- its not the wises of moves for certain!!
 
 
 
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