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    • #1
    #1

    Hey everyone. This is my first time asking you all for advice, but I'm at a loss, so I figured "what the heck"...
    Here's my situation. I'm 20, and I've never been on a date or kissed or anything... I try not to let the fact that I'm "undesirable" affect me, and just try to ignore it and do what I have to do...
    Well first of all, I want to know if that's a huge turn-off for a guy. It's not like I haven't wanted to do anything, it's just that the opportunity hasn't presented itself.
    Also, this tends to make me rather anxious when it comes to guys in general, I feel like I make a lot out of nothing, I don't tell them that, but I do... Currently I like a guy who teases me a lot, we joke around all the time, and recently people have started to make comments about him being a flirt or other weird things like that... He's even said he is ticked off by a guy who likes to "hit on" me and another girl in really creepy and gross fashions...
    So he says we should hang out, or go to the movies, and always adds the "just as friends not asking you out or anything" and I'd love to hang out, but I tell him to tell me when and he doesn't. He hangs out with other mutual friends, but never with me.
    I guess I just need some opinions about why or what it could all mean? I mean, like I said, I have no experience and therefore am scared and nervous and hopeful but I don't want to get hurt.
    Thanks in advance, everyone!
    • #2
    #2

    I am not sure what kind of guy he is. I have some female friends who I personally don't find attractive and I can always feel 100% relaxed to joke with. Of course, I also have some female friends who I do find attractive and do want to go out with them regardless whether they have gfs or not.

    Hopefully that guy is not like me or you may be a little disappointed. If that guy is unfortunately a bit like me, then observe the kind of girls he hangs out with and find something shared common in them- dress, makeup, sexiness? Then make a bit of effort to attract him rather than wait there.

    Good luck.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Currently I like a guy who teases me a lot, we joke around all the time, and recently people have started to make comments about him being a flirt or other weird things like that... He's even said he is ticked off by a guy who likes to "hit on" me and another girl in really creepy and gross fashions...
    So he says we should hang out, or go to the movies, and always adds the "just as friends not asking you out or anything" and I'd love to hang out, but I tell him to tell me when and he doesn't. He hangs out with other mutual friends, but never with me.
    I guess I just need some opinions about why or what it could all mean? I mean, like I said, I have no experience and therefore am scared and nervous and hopeful but I don't want to get hurt.
    I honestly don't know. That's a tricky one. Maybe he thinks that you like him, wants to be friends with you, but doesn't want to give you the wrong idea? Or maybe he is trying not to make it too obvious that he likes you?

    I don't think you should read into the fact that he doesn't like that "creepy guy" - most male friends are really protective when it comes to guys like that.

    If you really like him, why ask TSR to interpret his actions, when you can ask him? Suggest doing something with just the two of you - see a film you both wanted to see, grab a coffee after you've met up with some friends etc. See how he reacts.
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    (Original post by *Katie*)
    I honestly don't know. That's a tricky one. Maybe he thinks that you like him, wants to be friends with you, but doesn't want to give you the wrong idea? Or maybe he is trying not to make it too obvious that he likes you?

    I don't think you should read into the fact that he doesn't like that "creepy guy" - most male friends are really protective when it comes to guys like that.

    If you really like him, why ask TSR to interpret his actions, when you can ask him? Suggest doing something with just the two of you - see a film you both wanted to see, grab a coffee after you've met up with some friends etc. See how he reacts.
    :dito:
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    Seriously any guy who cares that you have zero experience doesnt deserve a girl. I know your female, but I think an unexperienced guy would be so cute, in a weird weird :p: hehe. They could teach you the ropes. And the guy you kinda like, he sounds interested. And eventhough he adds the "just as friends" part on the end of invitations could just mean he's nervous kinda. But I don't understand the last part of your post. How he says you should all hang out but he doesnt say a time ?? hmm weird. Maybe you could do the organising.
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    But if he does just want to be mates..try and forget about him romanticly..beacsue it can get really painful/consuming
    • #1
    #1

    Thanks for all of your help, everyone... In response to your responses:
    I don't know, some of his jokes border on "hitting on me" Like "Oh, you're so sassy, I love it." in a "creepy" voice. He doesn't seem to ever do that to anyone else that I've seen...
    I think I'm scared to ask him because the last guy I tried to pursue stopped talking to me completely when I said "I like you a lot, maybe more than a friend, and I just wanted you to know, and if you feel the same, great, if not, well, I don't want us to not talk" but now he won't even look at me.
    Actually, we've got a friend get together for a few birthdays that we've decided to have and have invited him, so I don't know if he's going or not, but I pretty much organized that, so... Keeping my fingers crossed.
    Thanks for the opinions. Like I said, I'm afraid because of past experiences and I don't want to lose the friendship we have, but I don't want to wonder what if. So we'll see, the next few weeks are really busy for us, but maybe after that, assuming he makes it tomorrow, we can hang out one on one and see what happens...
 
 
 
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