Turn on thread page Beta

Change in personality when romantically involved watch

Announcements
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    As an individual I'm a very independent person, that's how I've grown up to be. But whenever I become involved with a guy, I suddenly lose all sense of my strength and independence and become something different. It's difficult to explain really, but it's annoying for me as I don't like to come across as emotionally dependent on somebody; I like my independence. But I seem to lose it all as soon as a guy is on the scene. Does anybody else experience this? A drastic personality change when involved with somebody?
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by callumward97)
    As an individual I'm a very independent person, that's how I've grown up to be. But whenever I become involved with a guy, I suddenly lose all sense of my strength and independence and become something different. It's difficult to explain really, but it's annoying for me as I don't like to come across as emotionally dependent on somebody; I like my independence. But I seem to lose it all as soon as a guy is on the scene. Does anybody else experience this? A drastic personality change when involved with somebody?
    When you like someone, it is normal to slightly change in order to attract them more, impress them etc. I am not saying that's right, but it's a common thing and it happens a lot. As you get more comfortable in the relationship, you tend to stop trying so hard and eventually go back to how you normally are. If it annoys you, just try harder not to change in order to impress anyone. Be yourself! I am not sure if this is what you mean, but that's how I interpreted it.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Mother's Mercy)
    When you like someone, it is normal to slightly change in order to attract them more, impress them etc. I am not saying that's right, but it's a common thing and it happens a lot. As you get more comfortable in the relationship, you tend to stop trying so hard and eventually go back to how you normally are. If it annoys you, just try harder not to change in order to impress anyone. Be yourself! I am not sure if this is what you mean, but that's how I interpreted it.
    Yeah I understand that, but it's almost an uncontrollable change. I'm fully aware that I act differently, but I can't do anything about it. As soon as I'm by myself again, my personality goes straight back to how it usually is. I'm thinking it may be linked to anxiety but I don't really know
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by callumward97)
    Yeah I understand that, but it's almost an uncontrollable change. I'm fully aware that I act differently, but I can't do anything about it. As soon as I'm by myself again, my personality goes straight back to how it usually is. I'm thinking it may be linked to anxiety but I don't really know
    Mhm, I see! I think you may have to think about why you do it. It is because you crave acceptance? does it happen only when you have a crush on someone, or with people in general? it could be linked to something else, maybe?
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    It's only with crushes, romantic interests. It's undoubtedly linked to something else, I'm just unsure what. And it's an annoying thing to experience because I'm fully aware when it's happening, I'm just powerless to do anything about it
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Have you ever had a bad experience with a previous partner? if that is the case, maybe you are subconsciously hurt and are being more careful, 'pleasing' for that reason? hence your personality change. I guess one of the important questions is, are you worried that if you are yourself, they won't like you? has a partner ever criticized the way you are and has that hurt you a lot? I'm just trying to figure out what it could be :' but ultimately that's up to you, because you know yourself best! we can only try and pin point things that could be. Hope this is helping somehow.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Mother's Mercy)
    Have you ever had a bad experience with a previous partner? if that is the case, maybe you are subconsciously hurt and are being more careful, 'pleasing' for that reason? hence your personality change. I guess one of the important questions is, are you worried that if you are yourself, they won't like you? has a partner ever criticized the way you are and has that hurt you a lot? I'm just trying to figure out what it could be :' but ultimately that's up to you, because you know yourself best! we can only try and pin point things that could be. Hope this is helping somehow.
    I don't think it's really a change to impress somebody because I feel like they'd like me more if I acted myself. I definitely think that it's an anxiety related issue. The only negative thing I've had from an ex-boyfriend is that he said I was too emotionally dependent on him. Which is exactly the thing I'm talking about here. It's just really frustrating. Thanks for helping 😊
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by callumward97)
    I don't think it's really a change to impress somebody because I feel like they'd like me more if I acted myself. I definitely think that it's an anxiety related issue. The only negative thing I've had from an ex-boyfriend is that he said I was too emotionally dependent on him. Which is exactly the thing I'm talking about here. It's just really frustrating. Thanks for helping 😊
    Aw I see. If you are sure it is anxiety, then maybe you should talk to someone who understands anxiety? I've never 'suffered' from it so I doubt I can be of any more help :') and you are welcome!
 
 
 
Poll
Brexit: Given the chance now, would you vote leave or remain?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.