Feel like everybody hates me at university Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 2 years ago
#1
Hi,

Thank you for reading this, I will try to make brief. Really appreciate any help as I am seriously struggling right now.

I am a female student at uni about to go into fourth year. I have always enjoyed partying and socializing at uni and without sounding up myself I am well known around campus as a party-goer. Last year, I know it sounds stupid but I felt a pressure to live up to my partying reputation. For some reason this coincided with me drinking more and alcohol starting to effect me badly. I've always been a very happy, fun drunk person, but this year I started to turn into a mean, angry drunk who says quite *****y things. I also have been getting bad blackouts where I don't remember large chunks of the night. I get massive anxiety the day after drinking where I worry about the things that I know I said that were mean and also about the other things that I maybe did.

Since this year has been over I have decided to pretty much stop drinking and so far I have been successful at this. When I go to the pub I have a glass of wine but I haven't been binge drinking anymore and I intend to keep this up.

My main concern however is a real concern that people absolutely hate me if they have had a drunk encounter with me when I have been drunk/blacked out and have said something mean to them. This really isn't my normal personality and I am so ashamed that I have done this. As far as I am aware this hasn't happened too many times but there are likely to be times when I have been blacked out that this has happened.

What do you think I should do about this? Apologise to anyone that I have been mean to? What would you do if someone comes up to me and says what a ***** I am. I'm sorry to write a post this long, but I am seriously depressed about this at the moment.
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threeportdrift
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#2
Report 2 years ago
#2
(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi,

Thank you for reading this, I will try to make brief. Really appreciate any help as I am seriously struggling right now.

I am a female student at uni about to go into fourth year. I have always enjoyed partying and socializing at uni and without sounding up myself I am well known around campus as a party-goer. Last year, I know it sounds stupid but I felt a pressure to live up to my partying reputation. For some reason this coincided with me drinking more and alcohol starting to effect me badly. I've always been a very happy, fun drunk person, but this year I started to turn into a mean, angry drunk who says quite *****y things. I also have been getting bad blackouts where I don't remember large chunks of the night. I get massive anxiety the day after drinking where I worry about the things that I know I said that were mean and also about the other things that I maybe did.

Since this year has been over I have decided to pretty much stop drinking and so far I have been successful at this. When I go to the pub I have a glass of wine but I haven't been binge drinking anymore and I intend to keep this up.

My main concern however is a real concern that people absolutely hate me if they have had a drunk encounter with me when I have been drunk/blacked out and have said something mean to them. This really isn't my normal personality and I am so ashamed that I have done this. As far as I am aware this hasn't happened too many times but there are likely to be times when I have been blacked out that this has happened.

What do you think I should do about this? Apologise to anyone that I have been mean to? What would you do if someone comes up to me and says what a ***** I am. I'm sorry to write a post this long, but I am seriously depressed about this at the moment.
There's no point trying to apologise to people when you don't know who they are, what you said of what actually happened. Just let a few people know that you have actively drawn back on the drinking this year, because you realised it made you into a bit of a **** to other people and you don't want to be that sort of person.

Have a think about what your response would be if you heard someone who was a drunken **** to you last year had learnt from it and had stopped binge drinking. Probably a bit of 'about time too' but also respect for realising and self-managing the situation.
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Anonymous #2
#3
Report 3 weeks ago
#3
I'm going through a similar sort of thing at the moment. I completely embarrassed myself the other night and told my boyfriend (repeatedly) that I hate him, but I have no idea why because I love him more than anything in the world. I have been depressed in bed for two days and me and my boyfriend had a huge argument because he was so upset. I guess the only thing you can do is learn from it - I have vowed to myself now that I will never get like that again. I want to make a life I am proud of, and going out really isn't worth the guilt and shame the next day. I don't think you should apologise to people (unless you know for sure you said something mean to them) because at the end of the day they could've been black out drunk and not remembered it either. Also they most likely aren't even thinking about it anymore - people have their own problems to think about. So don't worry about it. (I should take my own advice lol).
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