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    I'm feeling so confused and conflicted about this. This morning, my mum took some of my clothes into my room and found my diary sitting on my bedside table, and she read it. In my last entry, I'd ranted about something she'd said that I took offence to - I was rather angry and upset by it, and when I'm angry, I can be very mean and rude, and what I wrote wasn't the nicest entry ever, and my mum saw it. Now, she thinks I have a really low opinion of her and she feels that she's an awful parent, but that absolutely isn't true.

    I should say that my diary started out as a 'positivity diary', as I was struggling with anxiety at the time - I had to write down five good or positive things that had happened that day, so initially there wasn't anything personal in it. However, a couple of months ago, I decided to use it as a normal diary because I didn't always get five things down and having to force myself to think hard for positive things just made me feel depressed. I didn't tell my mum that I'd changed it to a regular diary, and she read it this morning because she wanted to know how I'm feeling because, apparently, I don't tell her anything.

    So now comes the confusion and conflict. I feel absolutely horrible that my mum took it the way she did - just because I was angry and disagreed with what she said does not mean I hate her - but at the same time, I'm upset that she read my diary and basically invaded my privacy. And yes, I know that just leaving my diary out on my bedside table probably wasn't the smartest thing to do, but I had hoped that my mum respected me enough to allow me to have my privacy. If she had asked me how I'm feeling (regarding the anxiety), I would have been honest with her; however, now I'm afraid to be so with her, because what I wrote was my honest opinion at the time and I'm afraid that I'll upset her again.

    I'm really struggling to make heads or tails of how I should be feeling in this situation. Am I in the wrong? Am I wrong to be feeling the way I am? Or am I justified in being upset with her for reading my diary? Please help
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    omg RIP ur life
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    She's your mum. I believe if you told her exactly what you've told us, she'll see it the same way we're seeing it, and see past it
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    no. it is her fault, she should have better and not go into your diary. A diary is also the worst kind of book. you should have made it a journal, it is like a diary but you don't put your feelings into it.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm feeling so confused and conflicted about this. This morning, my mum took some of my clothes into my room and found my diary sitting on my bedside table, and she read it. In my last entry, I'd ranted about something she'd said that I took offence to - I was rather angry and upset by it, and when I'm angry, I can be very mean and rude, and what I wrote wasn't the nicest entry ever, and my mum saw it. Now, she thinks I have a really low opinion of her and she feels that she's an awful parent, but that absolutely isn't true.

    I should say that my diary started out as a 'positivity diary', as I was struggling with anxiety at the time - I had to write down five good or positive things that had happened that day, so initially there wasn't anything personal in it. However, a couple of months ago, I decided to use it as a normal diary because I didn't always get five things down and having to force myself to think hard for positive things just made me feel depressed. I didn't tell my mum that I'd changed it to a regular diary, and she read it this morning because she wanted to know how I'm feeling because, apparently, I don't tell her anything.

    So now comes the confusion and conflict. I feel absolutely horrible that my mum took it the way she did - just because I was angry and disagreed with what she said does not mean I hate her - but at the same time, I'm upset that she read my diary and basically invaded my privacy. And yes, I know that just leaving my diary out on my bedside table probably wasn't the smartest thing to do, but I had hoped that my mum respected me enough to allow me to have my privacy. If she had asked me how I'm feeling (regarding the anxiety), I would have been honest with her; however, now I'm afraid to be so with her, because what I wrote was my honest opinion at the time and I'm afraid that I'll upset her again.

    I'm really struggling to make heads or tails of how I should be feeling in this situation. Am I in the wrong? Am I wrong to be feeling the way I am? Or am I justified in being upset with her for reading my diary? Please help
    Just tell her what you told us. I know it's a difficult situation because you're angry she read your diary and upset that she will feel bad about what was written about her but i'm sure in these types of situations communicating and talking it out will help best! Good Luck
    • #2
    #2

    This exact thing happened to me a few years ago - if anything, the thing i wrote was worse than yours, and it happened only a few weeks or months after my mum came out of hospital from a brain tumour. I don't know enough about you or your situation to tell you what to do, exactly, but in my case: we spent weeks avoiding each other, and I felt horrible for weeks, but in the end it was resolved, because I told her exactly what I was feeling at the time and how I was just so angry that I wrote things I really didn't mean, and she forgave me.

    I think it's important for you to tell your mum all of your feelings on the matter, because if you leave things unsaid it'll probably crop up in the future and make her feel worse. You can't take back what you wrote, and your mum can't take back reading it, so the best thing to do is to be open about it and tell her how you feel, and hopefully things will be resolved.

    It took me weeks to gather up my thoughts and courage and to wait for the right time, though, so it probably won't happen quickly. But she's your mum. It'll be OK in the end
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    And yes, I know that just leaving my diary out on my bedside table probably wasn't the smartest thing to do, but I had hoped that my mum respected me enough to allow me to have my privacy.
    yeah mothers never do that. its got nothing to do with respect either, every parent feels a sense of entitlement to interfere in her kids life whenever she wants just because they brought them into this world.
 
 
 
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