I've been such an idiot :(

Hi, i'm an 18 year old (openly) gay lad. I'd been in a couple of casual relationships before but at the start of this year i met a guy i really really liked, mentally as well as physically (unusual for me i have to admit!)... he felt the same way & we started seeing each other seriously.

It was all going really, really well until a couple of weeks ago when i started acting like a complete paranoid idiot. I'd never been 100% convinced of his sexuality, i always suspected he might be bi, which obviously wouldn't be an issue, except that he's really close to a female friend of his - they spend all their time together, giggling, touching, etc... if you didn't know he was queer, you'd definitely think they were an item.

I suppose i just basically got really jealous and worked up and convinced myself there was something going on between them, in my mind it was practically a done deal, then when i was out clubbing one night, because i'm a stupid idiot, i ended up copping off with an older bloke... anyway, word got round to my boyfriend and we had a huge fight, i tried to defend myself with the "but you were having it off with her!" excuse and he (naturally) got really upset and angry with me, made it clear that him and her are really just friends, and stormed out.

That was a couple of weeks ago and we haven't had any contact since. I really really miss him and obviously now i can see how ridiculous and unfounded all my allegations were and what an idiot i've been. I am so guilty about the whole thing... i don't know what to do, this is tearing me up inside

please help

Reply 1

LuveeDuck

you have to talk to him about it and explain and apologize otherwise you'll get nowhere and you'll continue feeling guilty. be calm about it and as honest as possible, most of all try not to get angry over anything he might say cos that will way make it worse.

Reply 2

*Katie*

Just go and speak to him. Be apologetic. I'm sure he's had time to cool down and he misses you. Good luck :smile:

Reply 3

sophisticated

Give him as much space as he needs to calm down, then try and explain your point of view calmly and rationally, considering his perspective as well.
Getting angry again wont help matters at all, so make sure you stay calm.
And good luck :smile: