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    Hey there!

    So I found a few (3/6) of my flatmates on Facebook and I feel like we wouldn't really be best friends. They're not the type of people I'd usually talk to. I've also talked to a lot of cool people in other flats and I'd prob prefer to be moved to a different flat.
    What would you say? Should I ask the accomodation to move me? This is a private student accomodation, btw.
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    It's probably too late at this stage but it's worth a shot. Besides a lot of my friends who are at uni never really became close to their flatmates and made friends from the course or societies
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    You can't really know from a bit of Facebook chatter whether you'd enjoy living with people, tbh. (Unless they've said something outrageously offensive or threatening, but I'm assuming not or you'd have said so). Also - being totally frank - expecting to be 'best friends' with people just by virtue of living in the same flat is... a bit unrealistic. Some people may end up friends with their flatmates; some won't and will find their friends elsewhere. Either way, that's not an instant thing, because actual friendship isn't an instant thing. Far more relevant in terms of flatmates is agreeing on how you're all going to live together (aka the washing up and cheese-stealing stuff). At this point, any move you ask for is just a frying-pan-into-the-fire thing, so personally I'd leave it, wait and see, and not worry about whether you're instant best buddies with your flatmates - this is a more long-term thing.
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    (Original post by danalwill)
    It's probably too late at this stage but it's worth a shot. Besides a lot of my friends who are at uni never really became close to their flatmates and made friends from the course or societies
    Thanks!

    (Original post by Persipan)
    You can't really know from a bit of Facebook chatter whether you'd enjoy living with people, tbh. (Unless they've said something outrageously offensive or threatening, but I'm assuming not or you'd have said so). Also - being totally frank - expecting to be 'best friends' with people just by virtue of living in the same flat is... a bit unrealistic. Some people may end up friends with their flatmates; some won't and will find their friends elsewhere. Either way, that's not an instant thing, because actual friendship isn't an instant thing. Far more relevant in terms of flatmates is agreeing on how you're all going to live together (aka the washing up and cheese-stealing stuff). At this point, any move you ask for is just a frying-pan-into-the-fire thing, so personally I'd leave it, wait and see, and not worry about whether you're instant best buddies with your flatmates - this is a more long-term thing.
    Yea you're right though I was way more comfortable talking to students in other flats than them. They seem to be unsociable. Just don't know if it'd be weird asking the provider to move me into another flat with that explanation.
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    (Original post by sami2k16)
    Thanks!



    Yea you're right though I was way more comfortable talking to students in other flats than them. They seem to be unsociable. Just don't know if it'd be weird asking the provider to move me into another flat with that explanation.
    It's not weird to ask (they may not be axle to do or, but you can ask) - but living with the quieter people and being able to go hang out with the more social people when you want to is actually often a pretty good setup...
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    (Original post by Persipan)
    It's not weird to ask (they may not be axle to do or, but you can ask) - but living with the quieter people and being able to go hang out with the more social people when you want to is actually often a pretty good setup...
    So do you think it'd be easy to get to know other people even though you're in a flat with rather unsociable people?
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    (Original post by sami2k16)
    So do you think it'd be easy to get to know other people even though you're in a flat with rather unsociable people?
    I think getting to know any new people well enough to consider them friends takes a little time, but ultimately most people pick friends up from all over the place - it's not like they get issued to you on your first day with your room keys as the only people you'll ever know!
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    (Original post by Persipan)
    I think getting to know any new people well enough to consider them friends takes a little time, but ultimately most people pick friends up from all over the place - it's not like they get issued to you on your first day with your room keys as the only people you'll ever know!
    I totally agree with you. Nevertheless, I'd feel better at least trying to be moved into another flat. So I just emailed them. Didn't give them a reason though, just asking.
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    your not there to get along with people, you just need to go to lectures, do the exams and graduate
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    (Original post by PHD2027)
    your not there to get along with people, you just need to go to lectures, do the exams and graduate
    Even though going to uni is mainly about doing the degree, I disagree with you. The social part is also important. And I believe you should make the best of any situation, whether it's a good or a bad one.
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    Some people are completely different IRL than they are online. You have no idea if you'll get on with them until you've met them and settled in.
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    If you're really sure that you wouldn't get along with them then go for it. Having to bare with flatmates that you do not like/find it awkward to talk to will probably impact your university experience, I had some flatmates of whom I did not get along with and could not wait to move out. Though you will probably find friends in your course/societies you could always hang out with.
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    (Original post by Tiger Rag)
    Some people are completely different IRL than they are online. You have no idea if you'll get on with them until you've met them and settled in.
    I agree. However, it may be a good idea to follow his gut.
    (Original post by iLastKinq)
    If you're really sure that you wouldn't get along with them then go for it. Having to bare with flatmates that you do not like/find it awkward to talk to will probably impact your university experience, I had some flatmates of whom I did not get along with and could not wait to move out. Though you will probably find friends in your course/societies you could always hang out with.
    Thank you. I've been allocated to a new flat .
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    (Original post by sami2k16)
    Hey there!

    So I found a few (3/6) of my flatmates on Facebook and I feel like we wouldn't really be best friends. They're not the type of people I'd usually talk to. I've also talked to a lot of cool people in other flats and I'd prob prefer to be moved to a different flat.
    What would you say? Should I ask the accomodation to move me? This is a private student accomodation, btw.
    Hello

    It's a shame that you feel this way about these people and I'd firstly say don't judge a book by it's cover. You've only spoked to them over Facebook and it's pretty difficult to weigh someone up through the internet and that's something I believe strongly. Living with them and getting to know them in real life may be different.

    However, if you feel that strongly about moving then I'd suggest contacting the people who deal with the private accommodation. Usually in most accommodations there is always one or two rooms free - a couple of my friends moved around a lot in first year due to various reasons so it's always worth a shot!

    Best of luck
 
 
 
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