This discussion is now closed.

Check out other Related discussions

Why do Girls always go for the Popular guys in high school?

Scroll to see replies

...introverts (ie. geeks)...

Is this a sardonic remark about society's arguably unfair perception of introversion or is this what you honestly believe?

Just call me Mr Autistic.

Reply 61

Consie

You know what's sweet? Most of the popular girls that were at school are now pregnant. I'm glad I stopped hanging with that crowd around about Year 10, when their drug taking started to get quite hard. Has anyone noticed your always sort of considered sort of semi cool if you can play sport?

This is in terms of secondary school popularity. In terms of college popularity, as someone pointed out, it genuinely is more down to how much of a nice guy you are, instead of how much detention you have :P I think even if you are introverted its still easier to make a good network of mates, people tend to me more laid back at college and take you for what you are. Its bizarre really, I have no problem talking properly to dudes I dont know, but even now im still quite shy in regard to girls, despite havng had a g/f for bout 3 years.

Reply 62

Crimson Black

Elegy

Is this a sardonic remark about society's arguably unfair perception of introversion or is this what you honestly believe?

Just call me Mr Autistic.

Slightly sardonic. I myself am a geek and take pride in being an introvert. Truth is, there's not one introvert I've met who hasn't a hobby of some form (gaming; warhammer; AD&D and variations thereof; modelling; Trekkie; Browncoat; Toaster-hater :p:

; academia; countless others) that would qualify them as being a geek. Ergo, in my world, introverts = geek. :p:

And yeah, society has an unfair perception of introverts being geeks, but as I said above, I find it's true.

Reply 63

Elegy

Crimson Black

; academia; countless others) that would qualify them as being a geek. Ergo, in my world, introverts = geek. :p:

And yeah, society has an unfair perception of introverts being geeks, but as I said above, I find it's true.

You have a point there, it seems fair to assume a positive correlation between introversion and 'geekiness' for various reasons. I just don't like the word 'geek', it generally has negative connotations when it shouldn't. I suppose it's like calling people who are different 'weird'. It has negative connotations which I disagree with.

Meh, I'll just stick to being generally misanthropic and having a particular dislike towards extraverts seeing as all my experiences with them have been negative.

Reply 64

Crimson Black

Elegy

I've come to terms with the term geek. I had a bit of a crisis back when I was 16 - teenagers, eh - but now embrace it as a positive thing. People don't appreciate those who have a deep interest, or widespread one, in a person; at least, those extraverts I've met at uni are all about who can drink the most beer at once, and who can spend the most money in a club, which I couldn't give two flying turds about. The reason extraverts and introverts don't get on is because of a fundamental difference in what makes them tick - the former gets their energy from other people, and the latter from within themselves. Anyway: when I meet someone who, as you said, holds geek to be a perjorative term, I tell them in no uncertain terms to get off their ****ing high horse of perception and learn to not judge others before you get to know them.

Reply 65

Profesh

Confused_soul

as i say why do they go for the popular guys, No one Would go for Like the smart ones that dont get into much Trouble, and what aout the people that get bullied by evryone you dont usually see Girls with them i dont mean to offend any one But you dont usually, im just wondering Whjy the popular guys get all the fun.

Do I get a prize for correctly guessing which of those two descriptors applies to yourself?

Reply 66

Profesh

Crimson Black

Interesting. I've arrived at the conclusion that I am an introverted narcissist, which is what gives me ostensibly (though spurious) extroversive tendencies despite my relative lack of social-dependency and general preference for isolation; I can host parties, entertain girls and so forth, but tend to encounter something of a tolerance threshhold where my adulation-of-self is no longer being catered-for (or pandered-to). Extroversion contingent upon narcissism, if you will.

Reply 67

fat_hobbit

Confused_soul

Social proof. Simple as.

Most girls I know seem to be quite fussy about who they go out with; fit or minging...The guy has to get the acceptence of her friends - otherwise he is a no-go.

The really independent, rebellious ones that have a mind of their own will go for a guy they fancy - popular or not.

Aside from that, guys that tend to be popular are either a) very g-looking (to the point they are sought after) or b) know how to talk to women and have a good time. Introverted guys tend to be quite withdrawn and will probably be predictable and ask mundane questions.

Reply 68

Sticky

Crimson Black

introverts (ie. geeks)

Um what?

fat-hobbit

Aside from that, guys that tend to be popular are either a) very g-looking (to the point they are sought after) or b) know how to talk to women and have a good time.

I don't think a) is really that important. Sure, having physical flaws does not help your social popularity but at high school, good looks are really not a big deal. I'm not a good judge of male looks at all but was always surprised at how the guys pulling all the girls were actually not gifted by nature one bit: quite often rather short, sometimes quite bad skin, a face like it had been hit by a truck. But they were very confident in who they were. They had their style going on (thug/chav/whatever) and represented something so that, if a girl went out with them, she knew what her social status would be i.e. the girlfriend of a popular thug.

As for people complaining that girls won't go out with guys with good grades or who don't get pissed down the park, that's really not true. Sure there is a period in high school where it's all about being a rebel but even then, not ALL girls go for that type. What's important is to have your own style, your own identity and to be confident in it. The low-confidence nice guy who describes himself as "just an average guy" is really shooting himself in the foot. Sure you will find girls who will seek a "safe" guy who will make a decent boyfriend as opposed to looking for the most popular guy to get social recognition but there really aren't that many.

If you're a nice guy (not average guy with no confidence) who studies hard and is comfortable with himself then there are girls out there who actively seek those type of guys, just as there are girls out there who like some introverted musician type guy because he knows what he stands for and what he represents and so he clearly displays his "social value". Think about the social value a confident guy who does well in his studies has: he's potentially a great money-maker with a great job, but you'll notice that this social value only becomes really important during the late teens/at uni.

Girls go shopping for social value or at least it's one of the criteria when being attracted to a guy and deciding on whether to go out with him. If you don't have social value, why is a girl going to choose you? Social value doesn't have to be about being confident and outspoken but about representing something whether it be the musician type, the sporty type, the thug type, the emo type, the preppy type. You might be lucky to come across a girl to whom social value is really not a requirement but it's not that common from my experience...

Reply 69

spartakist

Sticky

The only person who actually dares to say the truth. Any other reason given by people is just avoiding the root cause. Guys fail to recognise the importance that "status" has for a girl (when a girl is young, status is provided by having a popular boyfriend, when she's older it might be a boyfriend who is seen as a tough man, or who has a lot of money...) and girls hate for people to point it out.

^Gospel truth...

Reply 70

notontsranymore

spartakist

^Gospel truth...

i second that.

Reply 71

Dann

Girls like popular guys because the very fact that they are popular means they have charachteristics and traits which people on the whole find attractive/admirable/whatever.

It's a bit of a ridiculous question in a way because your answer is in your question.

Reply 72

wazzup

because popular guys seem to be more confident, fun, good looking and not geeky. thats what teenage girls like. i m not talking about comprehensive chavvy idiots, who think they are popular.in private school popular guys are usually those who are good at everything, confident and good looking.

Reply 73

A'rebours

Because they are generally more confident ... but more often than not they are complete jerks. :cool:

When younger status is more important for a girl - as has previously been said, and at this point I think girls can be just as shallow as guys :rolleyes:

However, when girls begin to get older I think they begin to view people as individuals and see them for who they are rather than just considering how popular they are.

I also believe that as people get older popularity becomes less of and issue and people become more independent from groups and stereotypes etc.
Personally, I think it is just a question of maturity. :p:

Reply 74

anonymous1432

When it come to popularity i think its best to stay middle of the road.

Dont be a arrogant ****, who thinks he is brad pitts twin brother, but dont be a "lets go home and play world of warcraft, instead of losing my virginity to drunken lucy" type of guy.

Have sex with drunken lucy then go home and play world of warcraft... ya heard.

Reply 75

gracie24

hey, in y7, 8 9 the 'popular' people seemed to be the ones that either had been smoking since they could talk, or 'rebelled' against doing any work. At the time, people ovbiously thought that was cool but seriously, y11 came and most of them were band from the prom or had been expelled by then, and now they are the ones serving you behind a counter or cleaning the floor with no grades. popularity is a stupid thing. admittedly the acedemic ones could be the surgeons earning a mint and saving your life someday - treat them with respect! but come on, geeks need to get themselves out into the world and learn how to party! then they will meet some girls :smile: