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    When I started a new job there was one guy who I got on really well with. It was purely platonic and we just got on great.We used to meet up in a group as a few of us got on really well. Because he had a girlfriend I took everything completely innocently. After about two months I noticed he would never want to be on his own with me and he started going out of his way to discuss how hot other girls were and flirting with girls at the bar. I just took this to be he was a bit of a flirt but I knew he never cheated on his girlfriend. He would actively avoid any IWe've been friends for a year now and we honestly get on great. I love our little group of friends and for the first time ever I feel I belong somewhere. I look forward to meeting up and I value every single one of our group.The problem is my friend has now stopped speaking to me at all. He is terrified to be alone with me, gets nervous in my presence, tries everything he can to show me he isn't interested. I miss how he used to be natural and normal with me. My time with the group is affected as I can't even relax.It might be that he has mistaken my friendliness for flirtiness and wants to put me off him. So I'm guessing he doesn't want to be around me as he's faithful to his girlfriend and wants to distance himself from me.I don't see him in that way at all.He doesn't need to worry that I will pounce on him! So I tried to make things better by subtly showing him in not interested. I tried to be friendly but make sure he knew I wasn't interested. But it's made no difference. The guy looks like he's about to die when I just say hello toHim.I chose not to attend a few events with the group recently as I've injured my knee. So I was hoping when I went back things would be better. They weren't! He avoided me completely. He was even worse. He loves his girlfriend, wants to stay with his girlfriend but I think he has a crush on me. If it is a crush, Will this crush pass? This group of friends means the world to me, and I honestly don't want this to continue.It's been a year now and for 6 months I barely saw him. It doesn't seem to have made much difference.I would love some advice on whether this is likely to continue for a while. Will he eventually just get over his crush and be natural again? I really miss him as a friend. And what can I do to help him feel better around me? I genuinely don't think he's interested in me. He has done nothing to show any actual interest. Just a crush. Do I have a duty to avoid him too? He's only 23. I'm older at 27. When it's time to say good bye at the end of the night he always makes a big effort in the way he says goodbye. He made a big deal of adding me on social media.So I do think he wants to stay in contact and be friendly.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    When I started a new job there was one guy who I got on really well with. It was purely platonic and we just got on great.We used to meet up in a group as a few of us got on really well. Because he had a girlfriend I took everything completely innocently. After about two months I noticed he would never want to be on his own with me and he started going out of his way to discuss how hot other girls were and flirting with girls at the bar. I just took this to be he was a bit of a flirt but I knew he never cheated on his girlfriend. He would actively avoid any IWe've been friends for a year now and we honestly get on great. I love our little group of friends and for the first time ever I feel I belong somewhere. I look forward to meeting up and I value every single one of our group.The problem is my friend has now stopped speaking to me at all. He is terrified to be alone with me, gets nervous in my presence, tries everything he can to show me he isn't interested. I miss how he used to be natural and normal with me. My time with the group is affected as I can't even relax.It might be that he has mistaken my friendliness for flirtiness and wants to put me off him. So I'm guessing he doesn't want to be around me as he's faithful to his girlfriend and wants to distance himself from me.I don't see him in that way at all.He doesn't need to worry that I will pounce on him! So I tried to make things better by subtly showing him in not interested. I tried to be friendly but make sure he knew I wasn't interested. But it's made no difference. The guy looks like he's about to die when I just say hello toHim.I chose not to attend a few events with the group recently as I've injured my knee. So I was hoping when I went back things would be better. They weren't! He avoided me completely. He was even worse. He loves his girlfriend, wants to stay with his girlfriend but I think he has a crush on me. If it is a crush, Will this crush pass? This group of friends means the world to me, and I honestly don't want this to continue.It's been a year now and for 6 months I barely saw him. It doesn't seem to have made much difference.I would love some advice on whether this is likely to continue for a while. Will he eventually just get over his crush and be natural again? I really miss him as a friend. And what can I do to help him feel better around me? I genuinely don't think he's interested in me. He has done nothing to show any actual interest. Just a crush. Do I have a duty to avoid him too? He's only 23. I'm older at 27. When it's time to say good bye at the end of the night he always makes a big effort in the way he says goodbye. He made a big deal of adding me on social media.So I do think he wants to stay in contact and be friendly.
    This is an interesting story and situation. There could be many things. Most likely he has a crush or some type of feelings and he is scared that they do not grow more by him being around you. Maybe his girlfriend is not happy about it so he is trying to keep away.

    I think you both are grown up and to me the best idea is to just talk and really ask him what the hell is going on. Explain how you feel and let him explain how he feels. Some communication can sometimes work very well. On the other hand if he does not want to be around you there is little you can do then talking to him and letting him know that you want to be friends. Sorry if I have not been much of a help. However, try and really talk to him and see whats wrong.
 
 
 
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