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Please give suggestions how i can improve my conversation skills Watch

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    I am totally crap at small talk and talking in general to people I don't know and It really depresses me how I have never been able to get better at it no matter how hard i try.

    Having to have any conversation besides with the very few who are very close with frightens me to death these days. I find myself quickly (very quickly) running out of things to say and ask and i'm forever worrying if my conversations are absolutely boring. Even with family it can be hard.

    It just feels as though everyone else was born a natural extrovert with gift of the gab while I have always struggled, especially in dating where it seems like the guy is expected to hold the conversation.

    Is there anything i can do to improve at conversation and interacting with people (particularly with women)? I find myself on Youtube watching and then trying to emulate these people who are great at conversation but my attempts always fail.

    Is there any activity i can do? Any thing that will help me and stop my brain coming to a shutdown when it comes to conversation (especially small talk?)



    Posted from TSR Mobile
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    Don't make small talk😉, most girls don't even like small talk. Start big straight away with a deep conversation
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    (Original post by jblackmoustache)
    It just feels as though everyone else was born a natural extrovert with gift of the gab while I have always struggled, especially in dating where it seems like the guy is expected to hold the conversation
    Appreciate it can feel that way sometimes, but out and out extroverts are actually rather rare, and most introverts find their form sooner or later, in the right company

    Is there anything i can do to improve at conversation and interacting with people (particularly with women)?
    Plenty, yes!

    Is there any activity i can do?
    Yup, there are quite a few, but you might like to step back first and ask yourself where you ought to start in terms of personal development. For some of my clients just learning tips and tricks can be enough, for others we have to go right back to the fundamentals of self-worth before we can make meaningful and sustainable progress

    Any thing that will help me and stop my brain coming to a shutdown when it comes to conversation (especially small talk?)
    The basics, like posture, body language, pacing yourself, breathing exercises, state-shifting, and inculcating more of a 'zero ****s given' vibe, for a kick off!

    (Original post by Pinkberry_y)
    Start big straight away with a deep conversation
    Hey, have you ever wondered about the mysteries of the universe? :teeth:
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    Try starting the conversation with something funny or a topic that can lead you talk about various different things.
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Hey, have you ever wondered about the mysteries of the universe? :teeth:
    Exactly like this
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    (Original post by Pinkberry_y)
    Exactly like this
    I jest, but generally do hit girls like a ton of bricks with my psuedo-intellectual/pop-psychological musings. Je regret rien :pierre:
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    (Original post by jblackmoustache)
    I am totally crap at small talk and talking in general to people I don't know and It really depresses me how I have never been able to get better at it no matter how hard i try.

    Having to have any conversation besides with the very few who are very close with frightens me to death these days. I find myself quickly (very quickly) running out of things to say and ask and i'm forever worrying if my conversations are absolutely boring. Even with family it can be hard.

    It just feels as though everyone else was born a natural extrovert with gift of the gab while I have always struggled, especially in dating where it seems like the guy is expected to hold the conversation.

    Is there anything i can do to improve at conversation and interacting with people (particularly with women)? I find myself on Youtube watching and then trying to emulate these people who are great at conversation but my attempts always fail.

    Is there any activity i can do? Any thing that will help me and stop my brain coming to a shutdown when it comes to conversation (especially small talk?)



    Posted from TSR Mobile
    The easiest way to keep a conversation going AND enjoy it is to ask the other person lots of questions, preferably questions that require more than just a yes/no answer. So if someone tells you that they're studying Geography at Bristol Uni, ask them questions like:
    - why did you want to study geography?
    - what parts of the course do you enjoy?
    - do you like living in Bristol?
    - what do you like about living in Bristol? (this will leads to lots of things to talk about depending on what they say)
    - I'd love to go to Bristol! Do you have a favourite area in Bristol that you like to hang out in?

    That'll keep them chatting for ages. You can comment on the things they say or you can wait for them to ask you questions.

    If you feel like you haven't got anything to say, it may be that the other person isn't asking you good questions. Most people will enjoy a conversation with you if they think that you're interested in them.

    Learning to leave conversations is the hardest part!
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    (Original post by ComfyCardi)
    The easiest way to keep a conversation going AND enjoy it is to ask the other person lots of questions, preferably questions that require more than just a yes/no answer. So if someone tells you that they're studying Geography at Bristol Uni, ask them questions like:

    - why did you want to study geography?
    - what parts of the course do you enjoy?
    - do you like living in Bristol?
    - what do you like about living in Bristol? (this will leads to lots of things to talk about depending on what they say)
    - I'd love to go to Bristol! Do you have a favourite area in Bristol that you like to hang out in?

    That'll keep them chatting for ages. You can comment on the things they say or you can wait for them to ask you questions.

    If you feel like you haven't got anything to say, it may be that the other person isn't asking you good questions. Most people will enjoy a conversation with you if they think that you're interested in them.

    Learning to leave conversations is the hardest part!
    I'd agree with you on the point that OP should learn to be a good listener, as this would take the pressure off them. However, considering that OP probably doesn't have particularly good social skills, there's a risk that the questions won't flow naturally, and it would become more like an interview. From my own experiences, if you go into a social situation with pre-planned questions you'll be too busy focusing on keeping the conversation going to notice potential responses/ questions that naturally arise in the conversation.

    If I were OP, I'd try to stop worrying about the conversation being boring, as this will inhibit natural responses. I appreciate that this is easier said than done though.
 
 
 
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