Gender acceptance at uni?

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    • Thread Starter
    #1

    As someone starting uni this September I'm a bit worried about the level of open mindedness.

    I'm a person who doesn't identify strongly as male or female and I use the term nonbinary (and they/them pronouns).
    I don't want people not to take me seriously but I also don't want to have to hide this part of myself for my entire time at uni.

    Does anyone have any advice/opinions of their own? If you were in my situation or if you were someone I met - what would your thoughts be if I told you this?

    Thanks for any help!
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    The Student Union and their associated officers etc will love you. They provide all clubs/meetings for nonbinary LGBTQ people to make them feel welcome - you might even get your own special private public toilet!

    The rest of the people there probably won't take it that seriously and will likely call you he/she based on how you look.

    Best advice: try and make friends with any other nonbinaries or similar identifications
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    No one is really discrimatory about gender at uni
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    mix with the sjw crowd.

    join the feminist society and you'll fit in
    #2

    Sounds awful but depends what course you're going to do. For starters that's where you make half your friends (I made friends from my course which then lead to making more friends of theirs). *on my experience (doing a humanities subject), there was absolutely no judgement on anything... The clothes a person wear, the way they wear their hair and definitely no judgement on gender.**
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    I can't speak for all universities but generally there are no issues. One of my friends went away over christmas break seemingly as one gender and came back as their actual one after a transition. I didn't feel phased and neither did anyone else :P people are generally really accepting and it's great!
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Sounds awful but depends what course you're going to do. For starters that's where you make half your friends (I made friends from my course which then lead to making more friends of theirs). *on my experience (doing a humanities subject), there was absolutely no judgement on anything... The clothes a person wear, the way they wear their hair and definitely no judgement on gender.**
    hmm I know what you mean - I'm doing a science subject at a predominantly STEM uni so I guess I'll have to see how it goes. Hopefully the LGBT society will become my home
    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    hmm I know what you mean - I'm doing a science subject at a predominantly STEM uni so I guess I'll have to see how it goes. Hopefully the LGBT society will become my home
    same happened on our course as the person above except after a summer. There were a few times we called him 'her' just out of habit but there was never any judgement or anything! You will be fine honestly. At uni people are just happy to make new friends and nothing else really matters
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    I think people might ask a lot of questions or struggle to remember the correct pronouns at first. Obviously non-binary gender is less common than being transgender, etc. But if they're people worth hanging around with, they'll make the effort.

    Just be prepared to have to repeat the explanations over and over again and try not to get too offended if people slip up, would be my advice :yes:
    #3

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    As someone starting uni this September I'm a bit worried about the level of open mindedness.

    I'm a person who doesn't identify strongly as male or female and I use the term nonbinary (and they/them pronouns).
    I don't want people not to take me seriously but I also don't want to have to hide this part of myself for my entire time at uni.

    Does anyone have any advice/opinions of their own? If you were in my situation or if you were someone I met - what would your thoughts be if I told you this?

    Thanks for any help!
    So you want people to say 'They is not in them room' instead of 'She is not in her room'? I don't understand.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    hmm I know what you mean - I'm doing a science subject at a predominantly STEM uni so I guess I'll have to see how it goes. Hopefully the LGBT society will become my home
    imperial college? there's loads of international students there.
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    I accept people of every gender: male and female.


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    I would never discriminate against you but in my view there is only male and female. Whether somebody is biologically (or mentally?) that doesn't matter to me (except sexual partners, no offence but I would only sleep with a straight/bi girl who identifies herself as her biological gender and has always been a girl from birth) - my fiancée for example is bisexual but "indentifies", as her biological gender.

    And yes, guys she does like threesomes with other girls , although that might have more to do with us being both into BDSM)

    Does that make me a bad person? (my view on the gender matter)
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So you want people to say 'They is not in them room' instead of 'She is not in her room'? I don't understand.
    It's the singular they - they are in their room.

    You use it all the time when you don't know someone's gender like -
    "Have you met the new Professor yet?"
    "No, what are they like?"
    "I'm not sure, but I've heard they're great!"

    And yeah, I get that I'll meet people who are resistant to using these pronouns and I've accepted I'm probably gonna meet a lot of people using gendered pronouns so I'm just gonna deal with that lol
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by MeYou2Night)
    I would never discriminate against you but in my view there is only male and female. Whether somebody is biologically (or mentally?) that doesn't matter to me (except sexual partners, no offence but I would only sleep with a straight/bi girl who identifies herself as her biological gender and has always been a girl from birth) - my fiancée for example is bisexual but "indentifies", as her biological gender.

    And yes, guys she does like threesomes with other girls , although that might have more to do with us being both into BDSM)

    Does that make me a bad person? (my view on the gender matter)

    It just seems a little ignorant to be so resistant to other people's identities. And whether or not you would actively discriminate against me (thanks for clarifying you wouldn't lol. Nice to know you wouldn't come beat me up in my sleep) I probably wouldn't want to be friends with you. Just my honest opinion.

    Good luck with your fiancee though dude, I hope you two have a lovely wedding.
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Raees_Sharif)
    imperial college? there's loads of international students there.
    Nope and I don't see how international students would make any difference
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    I think people might ask a lot of questions or struggle to remember the correct pronouns at first. Obviously non-binary gender is less common than being transgender, etc. But if they're people worth hanging around with, they'll make the effort.

    Just be prepared to have to repeat the explanations over and over again and try not to get too offended if people slip up, would be my advice :yes:
    That's true! And yeah, I've been through this in my last year of high school and it wasn't too difficult - the friend group I was in all accepted it and apologised if they used the wrong pronoun.
    Not sure if that's to do with that they were mostly girls - I have a feeling (straight) boys will be a lot more reluctant to accept it.

    In all honesty, I know that I'll probably have to face my "birth" pronouns my whole life so what can you do
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Nope and I don't see how international students would make any difference
    International students would probably be the ones who will judge the most tbh
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It just seems a little ignorant to be so resistant to other people's identities. And whether or not you would actively discriminate against me (thanks for clarifying you wouldn't lol. Nice to know you wouldn't come beat me up in my sleep) I probably wouldn't want to be friends with you. Just my honest opinion.

    Good luck with your fiancee though dude, I hope you two have a lovely wedding.
    That's understandable

    And thanks

    Good luck for the future
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    (Original post by lucabrasi98)
    International students would probably be the ones who will judge the most tbh
    It's not about judging, it's more about the fact that there are only two genders: male and female.
 
 
 
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