I miss my ex and it's making me feel guilty :(

All of a sudden, I can't stop thinking of my ex.

I don't love him, I'm not in love with him... but I really miss his friendship. He was a big part of my life for many years, and now we have no contact.

I am in love with my current boyfriend, so I definitely don't want my ex back in a romantic way.

But I can't stop feeling guilty and unhappy about wanting him back as a friend.

My ex and I ended things on very bad terms (it was my idea not his); then I tried getting touch about three months ago to invite him out for a coffee to clear the air, which he knocked back. Spoke to him briefly over msn a month ago to congratulate him on his degree (he did very well, so I felt the need to say something). It was a bit stilted, but not unfriendly.

From facebook stalking I can see he's getting on with his life now - I told him to sort himself out, whilst we were dating, and he never did it. But now he's making something of himself, and it sounds like he's happy. Seems to me like he's finally moved on? Is this my chance to try and rebuild a friendship? Or will that chance never be there?

I'd love some advice for either how to approach him, or how to get rid of these feelings of wanting to talk to him. It's making me feel very low.

Reply 1

username47781

You need to get on with your own life now and forget him, you ended it at the end of the day and he's moved on. Concentrate on having fun with your boyfriend.

Reply 2

Rennie

It's hard to get over people... but at the same time if he's not being overly friendly then I can't see how you're going to get back a friendship.

It's difficult if when they were a big part in your life for so long and then they're suddenly not there but you have your current boyfriend and so should spend time being with him. What you're missing from your ex maybe you could try and recreate with your current boyfriend.

Perhaps that sounds a little odd. I just mean being as close to your current boyfriend as you were to the past one. That way you're not missing anything because you've got it still- just with a different person... who, as you said, you love.