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I don't wanna go back to uni and idk what to do Watch

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    The reasons I don't wanna go back to uni (second year law degree at a good uni) are:

    - I really struggled first year. I actually got very unwell and stopped eating and going out of my room completely. I would starve myself so I had no energy and could sleep all the time because I was so depressed. In the end I took a massive overdose in my uni room and very nearly died. My flat mate found me and called an ambulance, but it was a very close call. The memories of being in hospital after that overdose haunt me everyday. Essentially, I am terrified of anything like that happening again.

    - I have been working full time all summer in a really good office job; i feel not having a routine as such, like I do working, contributed to said state

    - when I recovered from my overdose, I somehow managed to attract a lovely boyfriend. He made uni bearable for me, but he dumped me on the last day of term. My only memories of me being ok at uni are from when I was with him; I no longer have him

    - I find the uni city really depressing and it's far from home. I'm from a lively southern seaside city and my uni city is a grim northern one it makes me feel depressed particularly in the winter

    - my family situation is an unstable one and that makes me feel less supported when at uni



    I'm living in a mixed house of 9 with great friends, but I still feel I am much closer to my home friends. They are all going back to uni though in sept.

    Idk what to do. It is frustrating because I feel I have no choice but to be at uni because I'm (not boasting) 'bright'. But I don't really enjoy it.

    suppose I have to go back but I guess I just want some encouragement because I'm feeling really low about it right now :/
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    Hi. I'm so sorry to hear you are feeling like this. Do you think it is the course you are studying,or the actual Uni you don't like or a bit of both? If you can figure out specifically what it is, it might help you to move forward and decide on your next move. Personally I think being happy is THE most important thing in life. I always say so to my 19 year old son. If something is making you unhappy then don't do it.
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    Hey, if seems like you are more happy away from university than you are at uni. Have you even thought of maybe dropping out!
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    (Original post by markova21)
    Hi. I'm so sorry to hear you are feeling like this. Do you think it is the course you are studying,or the actual Uni you don't like or a bit of both? If you can figure out specifically what it is, it might help you to move forward and decide on your next move. Personally I think being happy is THE most important thing in life. I always say so to my 19 year old son. If something is making you unhappy then don't do it.
    I don't think it is the course . Or the uni. I think it's the university lifestyle tbh.
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    (Original post by TitanCream)
    Hey, if seems like you are more happy away from university than you are at uni. Have you even thought of maybe dropping out!
    Yeah. I very nearly did last year after the OD. But then I met my now ex, and kinda sorted myself out so decided to stick it out.
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    Don't quit now because of the university lifestyle. You'll be so so so proud of yourself once you get through this and come out with your law degree. Talk to counsellors at your uni and phone up the night line, the support is there, just make sure you're talking to someone- anyone. I'm assuming your course is a 3 year degree? Just think to yourself right one year down. This year will go in a flash and then I'll just have one year left!
    Definitely let someone at your uni know though about your depression or go to your GP and have a chat with them, just please talk to someone when you're at uni so you're not left by yourself to deal with all these feelings
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    Hello again. I've just read your post again. If you got into a situation where you were not leaving your room, not eating and attempting suicide, then I would advise you not to go back. What do your parents say? By all means you could try a different university. But if there is an underlying reason why you behaved in that way, if it isn't dealt with then you will just take those same problems with you to another university.
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    (Original post by Pinkberry_y)
    Don't quit now because of the university lifestyle. You'll be so so so proud of yourself once you get through this and come out with your law degree. Talk to counsellors at your uni and phone up the night line, the support is there, just make sure you're talking to someone- anyone. I'm assuming your course is a 3 year degree? Just think to yourself right one year down. This year will go in a flash and then I'll just have one year left!
    Definitely let someone at your uni know though about your depression or go to your GP and have a chat with them, just please talk to someone when you're at uni so you're not left by yourself to deal with all these feelings
    It is 4 years cus doing a year abroad but thanks
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    (Original post by markova21)
    Hello again. I've just read your post again. If you got into a situation where you were not leaving your room, not eating and attempting suicide, then I would advise you not to go back. What do your parents say? By all means you could try a different university. But if there is an underlying reason why you behaved in that way, if it isn't dealt with then you will just take those same problems with you to another university.
    Yeah changing uni definitely would not help
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I don't think it is the course . Or the uni. I think it's the university lifestyle tbh.
    I don't quite follow what you mean by university lifestyle? Is it a very outgoing sort of place, drinking,etc? If you feel this isn't right for you then there are plenty of unis that are a lot smaller , in quieter areas. Or perhaps opt for accommodation that is in a quiet block?
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    You have to make the choice quickly about whether to
    1. Return.
    2. Take a break.
    3. Transfer.
    4. Quit.

    You sound in quite a good place and stable. Would it be that bad to defer for a year earn money and just get yourself together, then during next summer you cna decide whether to do 1.3 or 4. To do that you need to talk to your un/ tutor i immediately as well student finance.

    If you do return, then this year will have a heavier workload. Theres still every chance you could meet someone else thats nice, but you need to be honest with yourself and avoid slippping back into some of the things that made you spiral downwards in the first year. You have to make an effort to be and stay on top of things. If you cnat do that then I would take the year off.

    The worst thing to do is return and flunk your exams. This is especially so if you have aspirations for a legal career.

    Transferring closer to home will depend how well you didn in your first year or you could start a course all over again. You might be able to get the fees waived because of your mental health problems.

    If you decided to quit, then you cna always do Uni at a later date. the importnat thing is not to waste your funding.
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    (Original post by markova21)
    I don't quite follow what you mean by university lifestyle? Is it a very outgoing sort of place, drinking,etc? If you feel this isn't right for you then there are plenty of unis that are a lot smaller , in quieter areas. Or perhaps opt for accommodation that is in a quiet block?
    Like having a lot of spare time and not a clear structure to the day. For instance, in my summer job I've been working 9-5 but at uni I'd only have like one to three hours of contact time a day
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    You mentioned how much you enjoyed the job you did. What about working and part time study? Or looking to see if a uni does the same course where you could do it as a distance course? Open University? Many colleges now offer full Honours Degrees. What i'm saying is, you don't have to abandon the idea of getting a degree if uni isn't right for you.
 
 
 
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