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    A few years ago when during University, an old friend asked me out. We'd had a history of drunken/sober kisses, but nothing ever came out of it - but we remained very close and eventually he asked me out.

    Going into my 2nd year and being 7 hours away from him, I was reluctant, despite the fact I'd always felt the same towards him. I was scared to ruin our years of friendship when up against long distance (we were due to return to uni a week later) and hadn't really got much time to get the relationship off the ground. I told him I needed to think about it.

    During a shift at work later, some co-workers hacked my phone and started asking out recent contacts on my phone - including my friend - who read the message and was excited about us dating. I had to explain it wasn't me and I also wasn't interested all at once. He was crushed, and we didn't talk for a few months. He moved back to his University and got into a relationship he is still in now - so I never got a chance to explain and assumed the damage was done.

    A few years on, we are now both in long term relationships with other people and have recently got closer. The feelings are gone, but he has brought up to me what has happened. I really want to explain myself to him, as I felt he deserves to hear it, but I'm not sure if the time has passed and it would be best to let it lie.

    What are people's thoughts on this?
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    Back two school
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    * sings the one that got away by Katy Perry *
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    What is it you think you need to explain? I assume you had already told him that someone else sent the message to him?

    Just that you did in fact like him at the time? Probably not a good idea considering you are both in relationships. Just leave it be.
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    (Original post by Pinkberry_y)
    * sings the one that got away by Katy Perry *
    Songs got real feels to it

    (Original post by AndrewSCO)
    What is it you think you need to explain? I assume you had already told him that someone else sent the message to him?

    Just that you did in fact like him at the time? Probably not a good idea considering you are both in relationships. Just leave it be.
    I know it seems pointless, just wanted a second opinion. I didn't really explain it. Just sort of thought too much damage was done from the prank text and said I didn't think it was a good idea. I just feel so guilty and awful when he brings it up as I wasn't honest at time.
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    I feel sorry for your bf. You still have the feels. You wouldn't care if you didnt
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    (Original post by RooshVee)
    I feel sorry for your bf. You still have the feels. You wouldn't care if you didnt
    This possibility/likelihood occurred to me also
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    (Original post by RooshVee)
    I feel sorry for your bf. You still have the feels. You wouldn't care if you didnt
    You don't have to have romantic feelings towards someone you care about. At one point I did like him, so obviously I still care about the guy.

    I just feel very guilty looking back now on how I acted upon the whole situation. I just wimped out than explain myself and hearing it brought up still makes me feel bad for not manning up in the first place and letting our friendship suffer.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You don't have to have romantic feelings towards someone you care about. At one point I did like him, so obviously I still care about the guy.

    I just feel very guilty looking back now on how I acted upon the whole situation. I just wimped out than explain myself and hearing it brought up still makes me feel bad for not manning up in the first place and letting our friendship suffer.
    You still have romantic feelings for him. It's anonymous, just admit it. You want to keep him as an option for when this relationship is done.
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    If you were 17, I'd take u.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    A few years ago when during University, an old friend asked me out. We'd had a history of drunken/sober kisses, but nothing ever came out of it - but we remained very close and eventually he asked me out.

    Going into my 2nd year and being 7 hours away from him, I was reluctant, despite the fact I'd always felt the same towards him. I was scared to ruin our years of friendship when up against long distance (we were due to return to uni a week later) and hadn't really got much time to get the relationship off the ground. I told him I needed to think about it.

    During a shift at work later, some co-workers hacked my phone and started asking out recent contacts on my phone - including my friend - who read the message and was excited about us dating. I had to explain it wasn't me and I also wasn't interested all at once. He was crushed, and we didn't talk for a few months. He moved back to his University and got into a relationship he is still in now - so I never got a chance to explain and assumed the damage was done.

    A few years on, we are now both in long term relationships with other people and have recently got closer. The feelings are gone, but he has brought up to me what has happened. I really want to explain myself to him, as I felt he deserves to hear it, but I'm not sure if the time has passed and it would be best to let it lie.

    What are people's thoughts on this?
    Because he brought it up again then explain again that your colleagues at work sent messages to him aswell as other contacts on your phone as a joke because he was so hurt before that you did not want to go out with him. Pretend you had to explain to other people the same thing because of the silly prank then maybe he will get over it and not bring it up again then it won't be so awkward and you can concentrate on being just friends again.
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    Wow, your workmates were ****holes.

    I don't entirely follow though, you were friends and he asked you out. You said no. Then your work colleagues asked him out and he said yes but then you had to tell him it wasn't real. However, all this time you secretly fancied him?

    If you don't have feelings for him now then imo let it lie. Bringing it up just to say "Oh yeah, you know that time i asked you out. Yeah, i would never do that." Doesn't seem like it'll help anyone.
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    I would explain it to him like it'll feel nice getting it off your chest


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