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My Mental Health watch

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    My main concerns with how I live:- I don't care to do any thing - I have no goals in life- I've never really lived- Even if I did "get better" I wouldn't know where to start.Backstory:My mom lied a lot when I was young, I lived with my half sister (Her dad was in prison for murder) never known my real dad and stepdad was OK until... I'm 20 now but when I turned 16 I noticed my mom begin to lie a lot and my stepdad starting doing drugs I was never comfortable around him anyway I felt prisoned in my room whenever they were downstairs. I confronted my mom about the drugs and she denied it. Later on he ends up cheating on her with her best friend who lives close by. These people are not nice and constantly hostile. My mom loves drama and ends up dating an ex prisoner (She previously asked us if she was OK with him moving in but ignored me and my sisters "no"). This man smokes weed creates drama and at this point my mom becomes an alcoholic. I got between 2-3 heavily abusive fights before one happened in an outhouse in our back garden. It's a normal abusive fight but this time he ends up hitting my little sister so I get involved. He's drugged up at this point and my mom is drunk, we locked ourselves in the house called the police and luckily they arrived before he kicked the back door down. She promises to never see him again, a week later he is living in the house. I leave to live with my aunt drop out of college and then an apprenticeship. At this point I break up with the only real friend (and girlfriend) I've had for 3 years because of all this drama I can't commit too her as much. At this point I learn that I'm depressed and have anxiety. Since then I have tried multiple medications (I end up just feeling wirey and not my self on top of the other side effects) and a therapy session (where she was saying I wasn't "paying enough attention" to do it) and a counselling session where it just straight up didn't help. I have no issue speaking about my problems and speaking about them doesn't help.TLDR: My mom is a mentally unstable, alcoholic with a tendency to like bad people and drama. Never had male role model, I lost a girl of 3 years, places I once felt comfortable, family and education. I'm currently on ESA and housing benefits and live in a small room in a shared house I don't go outside, have no friends who live close by and have no motivation to do anything. The doctors can't do much more for me.I'm lost don't know where to start or what to do
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    (Original post by Ryancb)
    My main concerns with how I live:- I don't care to do any thing - I have no goals in life- I've never really lived- Even if I did "get better" I wouldn't know where to start.Backstory:My mom lied a lot when I was young, I lived with my half sister (Her dad was in prison for murder) never known my real dad and stepdad was OK until... I'm 20 now but when I turned 16 I noticed my mom begin to lie a lot and my stepdad starting doing drugs I was never comfortable around him anyway I felt prisoned in my room whenever they were downstairs. I confronted my mom about the drugs and she denied it. Later on he ends up cheating on her with her best friend who lives close by. These people are not nice and constantly hostile. My mom loves drama and ends up dating an ex prisoner (She previously asked us if she was OK with him moving in but ignored me and my sisters "no"). This man smokes weed creates drama and at this point my mom becomes an alcoholic. I got between 2-3 heavily abusive fights before one happened in an outhouse in our back garden. It's a normal abusive fight but this time he ends up hitting my little sister so I get involved. He's drugged up at this point and my mom is drunk, we locked ourselves in the house called the police and luckily they arrived before he kicked the back door down. She promises to never see him again, a week later he is living in the house. I leave to live with my aunt drop out of college and then an apprenticeship. At this point I break up with the only real friend (and girlfriend) I've had for 3 years because of all this drama I can't commit too her as much. At this point I learn that I'm depressed and have anxiety. Since then I have tried multiple medications (I end up just feeling wirey and not my self on top of the other side effects) and a therapy session (where she was saying I wasn't "paying enough attention" to do it) and a counselling session where it just straight up didn't help. I have no issue speaking about my problems and speaking about them doesn't help.TLDR: My mom is a mentally unstable, alcoholic with a tendency to like bad people and drama. Never had male role model, I lost a girl of 3 years, places I once felt comfortable, family and education. I'm currently on ESA and housing benefits and live in a small room in a shared house I don't go outside, have no friends who live close by and have no motivation to do anything. The doctors can't do much more for me.I'm lost don't know where to start or what to do
    Woah hey. Can I just tell you one thing? You are not alone. Here's what you need to do apply for a job and move out and as far as possible as soon as possible. You might still have doubts and stuff but confirming your circumstances you need to get as far away from that environment as possible. Something that makes me positive is volunteering try a charity shop or fundraising. Also see a doctor you need counselling and it's important you seek out this help as soon as possible. You might be thinking to yourself that there's no hope but there is! Every person is challenged through different ways but please don't do anything to harm yourself. Your first priority is yourself in this situation YOU come first. I'm sorry that your mum never put you first but it's up to you to do that after all you deserve a better life and it's not fair that your mum isn't trying to provide that for you. Please PM if you need support. You can overcome this! Inshallah x

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    Try childline they are incredible.

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