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Certain views I have and facts about being female are stopping me from enjoying life. Watch

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    I feel that certain views I have and elements of life hold me back from fully enjoying life and looking forward/having hope for the future. Women can't really set goals to improve their future success but men can. For example studies show that women subconsciously go for wealth and resources, therefore a man can be happy in life knowing that he has hope for the future if he works on his career goals and 'status'. However studies show that men don't really care about a woman's career, they look for youth and fertility. Both these factors are on a steady decline in women she has to face a constant battle to fight against age. Men have much control over wealth/status by working hard however a women doesn't have control over youth and fertility. Also a man is not on a time limit in life when it comes to fertility but a woman is. I think this is why over the past few years I've felt dissapointed about my gender and a pressure hanging over me to decide whether or not to have kids and knowing that I won't really be attractive if I wait until I'm older like I want to. Theres many people that follow this 'red pill' thing which has a similar viewpoint. I would like to remain single and enjoy myself and work on my body at the gym (in fact I do) but I feel this constant pressure of ageing now that I'm past 25. I want to relax and enjoy life focusing on sport, learning and improving myself I don't even want kids but I'm worried about having regrets when it's too late. The years go by so quick and I worry. I feel that if I'd have been male I wouldn't have this feeling and could just take my time in life.
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    these are stereotypes which can be knock ofsf.
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    What? 25 is hardly over the hill!

    Also most of that is b-ks. Studies show that drinking wine prevents certain cancers. Studies also show that wine can cause cancer. In the real world, most people couldn't care less if you have ambitions beyond babies. You get people asking...as soon as you so much as sniff a man or come within 5 miles of a baby but I just tell people I don't want children. It's not true but it's really none of their business whether we are having sex to make babies or just for fun.

    I'm ambitious and career driven. when my business is basically self functioning I'll think about maternity leave. We've pretty much decided that I'll stay at work and he will stay at home with baby
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    A man may be able to get a woman pregnant at any age but which 20/30 something year old woman wants to have a baby with a 40/50/60 year old man? most of them choose guys their own age because they need the dad to be just as healthy and active as them when it comes to chasing after the kid.

    so we may be able to procreate at any age but even we have a certain time limit in which to find a woman, settle down and start.

    according to statistics men stop being desirable to women at the age of 37, whereas women stop being desirable at 39.

    so yeah, not so easy for us to score with chicks indefinitely unless we are filthy rich (but then you are just essentially paying for a woman to be with you) or one of those incredibly rare, good looking older men who can still charm the pants off women of any age.

    why do you think most guys are just as eager to marry in their late 20s-mid 30s as women are? forget statistics and focus on real life.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I feel that certain views I have and elements of life hold me back from fully enjoying life and looking forward/having hope for the future. Women can't really set goals to improve their future success but men can. For example studies show that women subconsciously go for wealth and resources, therefore a man can be happy in life knowing that he has hope for the future if he works on his career goals and 'status'. However studies show that men don't really care about a woman's career, they look for youth and fertility. Both these factors are on a steady decline in women she has to face a constant battle to fight against age. Men have much control over wealth/status by working hard however a women doesn't have control over youth and fertility. Also a man is not on a time limit in life when it comes to fertility but a woman is. I think this is why over the past few years I've felt dissapointed about my gender and a pressure hanging over me to decide whether or not to have kids and knowing that I won't really be attractive if I wait until I'm older like I want to. Theres many people that follow this 'red pill' thing which has a similar viewpoint. I would like to remain single and enjoy myself and work on my body at the gym (in fact I do) but I feel this constant pressure of ageing now that I'm past 25. I want to relax and enjoy life focusing on sport, learning and improving myself I don't even want kids but I'm worried about having regrets when it's too late. The years go by so quick and I worry. I feel that if I'd have been male I wouldn't have this feeling and could just take my time in life.
    I think you are making yourself too much a victim.

    You have choices.
    You can go for career and money just the same.
    You have a biological clock and you will have to make a choice, just deal with it.
    Men are under pressure as well.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I feel that certain views I have and elements of life hold me back from fully enjoying life and looking forward/having hope for the future. Women can't really set goals to improve their future success but men can. For example studies show that women subconsciously go for wealth and resources, therefore a man can be happy in life knowing that he has hope for the future if he works on his career goals and 'status'. However studies show that men don't really care about a woman's career, they look for youth and fertility. Both these factors are on a steady decline in women she has to face a constant battle to fight against age. Men have much control over wealth/status by working hard however a women doesn't have control over youth and fertility. Also a man is not on a time limit in life when it comes to fertility but a woman is. I think this is why over the past few years I've felt dissapointed about my gender and a pressure hanging over me to decide whether or not to have kids and knowing that I won't really be attractive if I wait until I'm older like I want to. Theres many people that follow this 'red pill' thing which has a similar viewpoint. I would like to remain single and enjoy myself and work on my body at the gym (in fact I do) but I feel this constant pressure of ageing now that I'm past 25. I want to relax and enjoy life focusing on sport, learning and improving myself I don't even want kids but I'm worried about having regrets when it's too late. The years go by so quick and I worry. I feel that if I'd have been male I wouldn't have this feeling and could just take my time in life.
    Yes, but you get the cream in life early. Now you are past 25 you will be getting a taste of what average men grow up feeling. This is a blow to women because it's always worse being deprived of something you once had in abundance than being denied it to begin with and then slowly getting it.

    As a man not that far off 25 I'm far from immune to such feelings about getting older. The years do fly past and it takes so long to get my life in order that I forget to actually live. Physically, my eyesight is poorer, my stomach is no longer flat, my hair is going grey, I'm clearly not as good-looking as I was, and it's been a couple of years since any woman approached me. It takes force of will to overcome this and feel like you're actually improving, and career progression is one way you can do that.

    You are over-egging the pudding a bit, you've probably got five years still to live like a free spirit and have high sexual market value. But the great adjustment is coming over the horizon for you and you will probably start to want kids, or at least, like you say, worry about regretting not having kids later on. Hopefully you can find a partner you love before that time as otherwise things can get a bit Bridget Jones.

    Oh and most people don't have very much control at all over their wealth or status. Our society pretends people do so as to legitimise capitalism, but it's mostly a lie. As a woman, you only see the successful, rich, good-looking, lucky men. For every one of them there are ten who are dirt poor, fat, balding, impotent, etc who are as good as invisible to you. It's a bit of a myth for all but the very luckiest men that they get more social and sexual market value as they get older.

    Red pill is true as far as I've ever been able to tell. I'm glad you have read it: I'd venture you're more self-aware than the vast majority of young women. You are on a journey, as we all are, whereby you will learn what is truly important in life, and how there is far more of life the other side of the great divide. We are all only young, sexy and free for a short time. The bonfire of the vanities is at hand.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I feel that certain views I have and elements of life hold me back from fully enjoying life and looking forward/having hope for the future. Women can't really set goals to improve their future success but men can. For example studies show that women subconsciously go for wealth and resources, therefore a man can be happy in life knowing that he has hope for the future if he works on his career goals and 'status'. However studies show that men don't really care about a woman's career, they look for youth and fertility. Both these factors are on a steady decline in women she has to face a constant battle to fight against age. Men have much control over wealth/status by working hard however a women doesn't have control over youth and fertility. Also a man is not on a time limit in life when it comes to fertility but a woman is. I think this is why over the past few years I've felt dissapointed about my gender and a pressure hanging over me to decide whether or not to have kids and knowing that I won't really be attractive if I wait until I'm older like I want to. Theres many people that follow this 'red pill' thing which has a similar viewpoint. I would like to remain single and enjoy myself and work on my body at the gym (in fact I do) but I feel this constant pressure of ageing now that I'm past 25. I want to relax and enjoy life focusing on sport, learning and improving myself I don't even want kids but I'm worried about having regrets when it's too late. The years go by so quick and I worry. I feel that if I'd have been male I wouldn't have this feeling and could just take my time in life.
    These are massive stereotypes that you should take with a large pinch of salt. Look at all the positive female role models (Olympians maybe?) - some of whom are married or have children, some who don't. Your aim to enjoy life through sport and improving yourself sounds a much better idea than getting pregnant because you feel you have to.

    As for not being attractive when you are older! That's an idea promoted by the pharmaceutical industry to sell more creams and serums. If it was actually true we would have no married couples beyond the age of 35. Hopefully if you choose to have a child with someone they will not be so shallow as to base the relationship you solely on whether your skin is 'youthful'.

    The average age to have your first child in the UK is 28.5, and more women aged 40 or above had children in 2014 than those under 20.
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    Can you further explain what you mean. I was forced to skim read and I don't understand what i've just read.

    Although I understand the idea. You've discovered some truths and you're in the anger phase.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I feel that certain views I have and elements of life hold me back from fully enjoying life and looking forward/having hope for the future. Women can't really set goals to improve their future success but men can. For example studies show that women subconsciously go for wealth and resources, therefore a man can be happy in life knowing that he has hope for the future if he works on his career goals and 'status'. However studies show that men don't really care about a woman's career, they look for youth and fertility. Both these factors are on a steady decline in women she has to face a constant battle to fight against age. Men have much control over wealth/status by working hard however a women doesn't have control over youth and fertility. Also a man is not on a time limit in life when it comes to fertility but a woman is. I think this is why over the past few years I've felt dissapointed about my gender and a pressure hanging over me to decide whether or not to have kids and knowing that I won't really be attractive if I wait until I'm older like I want to. Theres many people that follow this 'red pill' thing which has a similar viewpoint. I would like to remain single and enjoy myself and work on my body at the gym (in fact I do) but I feel this constant pressure of ageing now that I'm past 25. I want to relax and enjoy life focusing on sport, learning and improving myself I don't even want kids but I'm worried about having regrets when it's too late. The years go by so quick and I worry. I feel that if I'd have been male I wouldn't have this feeling and could just take my time in life.
    Can definitely relate to resentment about being a woman - the imbalance in society is still massively skewed in favour of men, even though a lot of changes have taken place through the hard work of many brave feminists, there is still a rife and blazingly obvious inequality, that is even played into everyday by members of our own gender. That is the way things are. Things are progressing, slowly and duly, but all the changes we want to see won't happen within our lifetime. We can however make a change through the lives we choose to live and the resistance to conform to whatever expectations are placed on women. That is one way feminist change occurs in the first place, through changes in lifestyle choices by comparison with past generations.

    Don't read too much into this evolutionary psychology stuff, with regards to what men look for, what women look for. I do understand that there is some reason to it, but seriously, whilst a lot of men feel threatened by a successful woman, many others also view it is a positive and admire it. I know of women who have waited till mid thirties to have kids having built careers for themselves and it's worked out well for them. If you don't have any medical problems that jeopardise your fertility and have had a recent check up with a doctor, you can assume that you'll be fully fertile into your thirties at least.

    The key thing however is that you've just said that you don't even want kids right now - how could you possibly go forward on that premise? That's just a non-starter. It'd be a terrible situation to have kids and not be ready or willing to bring them up. You can't mother half-heartedly.

    You're single and 25, you shouldn't really be fretting about this. Maybe some people want to have kids younger, but don't feel pressured to by the lingering prejudice against women.
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    Thanks for the replies I've read them. Though people are saying I'm 25, I said I'm past 25 lol. It took me a while to mature when I was younger. I never bothered with relationships/dating or doing my hair/dressing up etc I didn't really know how to. People thought I was 12 when I was 16 and when I got to 19 people said I looked 14 maybe because I barely spoke. No guys were interested they would just make fun I've always been a tomboy and focused on keeping fit. I didn't go go out as I didn't have the friends it's taken me ages to get a little confidence/learn half decent social skills In my early twenties I was very anxious. This is why when people when people say say women lose 'attractiveness' at 35 I think hold on I've not even started trying lol. I doubt I'l even feel ready to have kids until way into my 40's by which time it is too late.
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    You have this knowledge, so don't just wring your hands, act on it.

    You are as attractive now as you ever likely will be. Do you want a long term relationship or a family?

    If so, start looking for a man you are willing to settle down with now. Be willing to overlook moderate flaws in a boyfriend but push for commitment relatively early and drop him if he is not interested. You don't need to be "ready" to have kids; once you have them you will find a way to make it work.

    If not, no problem, but in that case I doubt you'd have made this thread.
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    Paragraphs please.
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    You seem to have a massive chip on your shoulder over something. The main point I got from reading your post is that aging... is sexist?

    If men are looked at in relation to their career, wealth and status, then that is hardly our fault as men but the fault of women for looking at these factors rather than personality, appearance, etc.

    And even then, those points are generalisations. You will find women who are more interested in personality than wealth, status and career, and likewise men who are more interested in someone as a person than their appearance and youthfulness.

    From reading your post it just seems like you have some problems/issues in your life and you have seeked to attribute them to gender structures rather than trying to work through them properly?
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    Then change this! REBEL!!!!!!!!!!!

    and come on... it's not that bad...

    you can be successful and have the boys chasing you
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    There are upsides and downsides to being male and female. I could argue as a man that men have it worse but I'm not going to because I don't think feeling for sorry for ourselves is healthy.

    Even if you think women have it worse, so what? You are a woman, you can't change that. There will always be people who have it better whether it be gender, money, health, fertility, intelligence and there are always people who have it worse. Comparing yourself to others will just make you miserable.

    You just need to accept the position you are in and make the best decisions for you. Everybody has to make trade-offs in life, nobody can have it all. You need to take responsibility for your own happiness. Don't be angry at the world. Accept it for what it is and live the best life you can.

    Your feelings sound to me like something a professional could help with.
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    Ok I get it. Found the Men Go Their Own Way MGTOW follower.

    We can't afford to pay too much attention to the rants of those people. They are stuck in the anger and resentment phase of hating women which is totally wrong.
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    (Original post by RooshV)
    Ok I get it. Found the Men Go Their Own Way MGTOW follower.

    We can't afford to pay too much attention to the rants of those people. They are stuck in the anger and resentment phase of hating women which is totally wrong.
    Who would you be referring to?


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    (Original post by Juedjegfewo)
    Who would you be referring to?


    Posted from TSR Mobile
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