(Original post by Anonymous)
Background: Male, 19, Virgin, no girlfriends ever, few kisses, little confidence, girl of my dreams (I strongly know I can't meet anyone more on my level) has become a close friend [story of my life] and I know as we're living together in the same house next year (a big house, lots of people) that something will probably happen with her and another guy and it'll get to me!
Female. 19 (20 in Oct). Virgin. No boyfriends. Ever. No kisses. Ever. Little confidence (though getting better!). When she falls for a guy, she falls hard. Scared to approach them (extreme fear of rejection). Has to watch them going off with other people. Can be paranoid (currently feeling like she has few friends due to looking into things far too much). Gets depressed for a few weeks at a few times of year / a day or 2 each month due to lack of b/f or feeling completely alone in all senses.
I would say we're in similar situations! (Apart from genders and stuff!)
Just thought I'd say that to let you know you're not alone!
Although not a day goes by when I am totally happy with being single, I don't care. There IS somneone out there for you. Somewhere. There's someone for me too!
Sleeping with others is NOT going to solve your problem. Infact, I think it'd make it far worse!
You'll want to sleep with someone because you think it'll solve your problems. It won't. That thinking results in 2 things:
1) Unfulfillment - won't feel that special or exciting when you look back on it (even if it may have done at the time)
2) You'll have a bond with that person (assuming your not the 'use-them-and-lose-them' type (which, from your post, I assume you're not) ). When that relationship ends, you'll be far more devistated because of it.
That's one of the 2 main reasons I don't particularly want to go sleeping with anyone yet. (the other being religious belief, which far less people seem to understand!
Sorry to sound blunt, but they're my views. And I don't want to hear about yet another death due to someone deciding that they can't go on because even though they are popular and have loads of friends, they think they're worthless. You're not.
The world's completely *******ed up and obessessed with sex. All to often I get the impression that because I've not had sex I'm a loser. Because I'm a Christian I'm old fashioned and boring and all that crap. Well, I say balls to the world at large. My friends (and everyone I know / have met and will meet) know / will know that that's sooooo not true about me. As long as you don't take too much notice of the world at large, don't dwell on the times you feel like ****** and instead concentrate on the good times, you'll pull through.
And it's true what they say, you know? About people being more attracted to you when you're happy and having a good time (not to say that it's good in any way to be down, but there's a time and place for that).
Sorry for the long post, but I hope it helps!