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When's it official?

I'm posting as anon in case the guy reads this. But, as I'm 20 and the guy I'm seeing is 26...when and how do I know when we're 'officially' classed as being together (ie him referring to me as his g/f and vice versa)? It's not like he's gonna turn round and say "Will you be my girlfriend?" cos we're not 12...but I'm just curious. It's a while since I've been in this situation.

Reply 1

Vesta

18

How long have you been seeing each other? I guess it's just with time.

Reply 2

Segat1

16

Well, after a while I have a chat about exclusivity and say, "Look, I'd like to introduce you to people as my boyfriend. How do you feel about that? "

Reply 3

jumpinglunch

13

zomg facebook it,do you even have to ask.

On a serious note,Just ask him.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

LoL he doesn't use facebook...so that's out.

Might have to just ask him :eek:

Reply 5

Melana

14

A good way in is saying ' *RANDOM PERSON* asked me if I was single today." Then ask him what he thinks. Say you're not sure if you are, and you'll end up having 'that chat'.

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

OP

Good thinking Batman.

In fact...this has just occurred to me...but we were sat in his car the other day and I was telling him about this guy I always see on the bus who keeps asking me to go for a drink with him (been telling him about it since before we started seeing each other) and he snuggled up close and said something like "I don't wanna share you" - should I take this as gospel?!

Reply 7

Melana

14

OOooh that's a very good sign. And very cute. He sounds lubly. Well then say "This guy on the bus asked if I was single". It worked for me, and the next night we were officially a couple :smile:

Reply 8

technik

13

Anonymous

Good thinking Batman.

In fact...this has just occurred to me...but we were sat in his car the other day and I was telling him about this guy I always see on the bus who keeps asking me to go for a drink with him (been telling him about it since before we started seeing each other) and he snuggled up close and said something like "I don't wanna share you" - should I take this as gospel?!

ya, he's just attributed ownership to you now. hope you were expensive :biggrin:

Reply 9

wear_a_condom

just say to him "so can i call u my boyf?"

Reply 10

Anonymous #2

Not confirming with my boyfriend whether or not we were official led to him sleeping with another girl...cos he 'didnt know we were together' :rolleyes:

...so hurry up and claim him!

Reply 11

arminvanpite

14

I'll probably come off the worst in this here, but when I was seeing a guy a few years ago (I've spoken about him in a previous thread somewhere) and he'd taken it too far one night and really hurt me/made me angry, I ended up going off to another club with my best friend and pulling another lad just for fun (I didn't know they knew, and hated, each other) and it was only then that he started giving me the "I thought we were going out?" treatment when before, neither of us had said anything. So yeah, it's better than you get it out in the open and find out what's going on.

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

OP

True...well I don't think he has the time to go off with someone else. And I don't wanna sound big headed but it really seems from things he says in texts and stuff that he feels the same about me as I do about him. He keeps telling me he can't stop thinking about me and stuff...which is lovely, but I'd still rather get it all out in the open!! Plus, I'm really happy that (despite having opportunities) he's respected me enough not to try it on...I could sooooo easily fall for this guy!

Reply 13

CheesyBeans

1

I never said anything to my boyfriend like "Are we going out?" or "Am I your girlfriend?" because they just sound like things kids say to their "boy/girlfriend" on the playground. It just seemed obvious to us, and eachother, that we were together and it would be unacceptable for us to run off shagging other people. We didn't want anyone else so there was no need to say "Hey, I'm off out tonight and I might meet some fitties and I just wondered if we're official or not so I know if I'm allowed to go have sex with some slapper".

Reply 14

mermania

16

It becomes official after precisely 7 weeks, 4 days, 13 hours, 51 minutes and 42 seconds

Reply 15

net1989

see with mines it was someone else saying to him ' so is she your girlfrend?'
he text me that night going 'are you?' to which we had a conversation about what we both wanted!
i say you should just bring it up casually! better to know where you stand is it not? clarity is good, and he sounds lovely and seems to be really into you.

Reply 16

Music_Enthusiast

tesh^^

zomg facebook it,do you even have to ask.

Haha thats what I actually did, so don't take the piss!

Reply 17

kaylewhale

My bf (23) and I (18) were out one night and he just asked me 'so do you have a boyfriend?' he was obviously referring as to whether he was my boyfriend or not but it was soo soon into the relationship i ignored him and kissed him to shut him up. it became official when he asked me if he could change his relationship status on facebook and i agreed :smile:

lol

Reply 18

mudblood

1

I don't think that you have to ask after the age of about 10 - you just seem to know.