The Student Room Group

Boyfriend and other girl.

My boyfriend went to a party a couple of months ago where his band were playing. He didn't really know many people there, it was mainly friends of other people in the band. He'd met quite a few of them before though at gigs and other parties and things but at this party he really got talking to a few of them.

One of them was this girl whose number he got at the end of the night.

Ever since then they seem to be in almost constant contact. He has loads of texts from her and they're always chatting on MSN. I was looking at some MSN logs/texts the other day and they keep planning to meet up soon. She's having a party that he's going to but hasn't told me about and he never mentions me to her when they're talking about plans for the week or anything.

I don't know what to think. Am I just completely over-reacting or do you think he might like her a bit?
Reply 1
ask him about her cause it sounds like he might be hiding something from you but i might be wrong. but txting and chatting a lot he should be doing that with you
Reply 2
It may just be friendship, but keep an eye on it. Why don't you ask to go with him to the party?
ask him about this girl. just say that u know tht he talks 2 her but DONT say uve read msn convos etc cos thts a breach of privacy and might make him mad.

maybe its just a friendship, maybe he likes her a bit. he might keep stalling their meeting, cos he might not wana meet her so he keeps saying "ill meet u soon."

dnt be scared to ask him. otherwise this is reli gona start eating away at you
Reply 4
it sounds pretty suspect. it's not like she's an existing friend who he's meeting up with, it's some girl who he didn't even know so the fact that he got her number obvious shows there was instant chemistry and attraction with them.

i wouldn't stand for it, personally. but i'm controlling like that :biggrin:
I would say it was rather suspicious that he hasn't told you about her, and them both meeting up but they could just be really good friends, who knows. I'd suggest you confront him about it, tell him you're worried he seems to be talking to you less than her. Other than that you really can't find anything out unless you check his messages constantly bt tbh it would be best to just talk to him.
the gut feeling is that you shouldnt read his conversation logs and it's a sign of insercurity. The decision is entirely up to you but maybe I am a bit too trusting. I think you should talk to him but the word "confront" seems a bit too strongly used here
sometimes relationship is like gripping a handful of sand, the harder you grip...
lordcrusade9 made a good point, confronting is a bit harsh(my mistake). I just meant you should bring it up in conversation and talk about it. :smile:
Reply 9
OP, it sounds a little suspicious to me. As others have said, ask him about her but don't mention that you've read their msn converstaions, cause it is invading his privacy. Good Luck
Reply 10
Talk to him, don't assume it's more than what it is because it may just be completely innocent.
keep us updated lol
maybe he finds out what an underhanded sneaky jealous person you are and it goes from there............

You went through his personal convos, thats a terrible invasion of privacy and all because he met someone.

People can just be friends you know. So far he has done nothing to be suspicious, he might just not have got round to mentioning the party, he may be planning to invite you all along.
Well if he has nothing to hide he will tell you about his friend, but don't interagate him.
Talk to him about it but just try and slip it into conversation and don't make is sound like you're accusing him of anything, but that you're just interested about it. If he tells you she is just a friend, then take it as just that, because you don't want to be constantly worrying or paranoid about her. If you trust your boyfriend then you'll be ok.
If he does mention the party (even if you like squish it out of him) then be like jokey-ih and say omething like "Oh yeah, don't you want me there :P"

And it's a joke from you so he cant really fly off the handle, and if he say no, then you have a reaon to be suspicious. And if you get invited then you can see how they act together and go from there.
Hmmm. A bit dodge. Personally, if I liked somebody and fancied a bit of a flirt, I wouldn't mention my partner. If they're in constant contact and he still hasn't mentioned you, I'd be worried.
He should have invited you to the party too.
Dodgy with a Y.
Reply 18
I must agree with some of the above when I say that it sounds rathy sketchy if you ask me. Its one thing to text someone providing your gf knows but another thing to do it without telling your gf. If it was me I would do a little bit of subtle snooping i.e. msn chat checking and I think you can pretty much deduce from that whether these conversations are innocent or full of flirtation. Ask him out for the night of the party and see what his answer is. If he mentions the party why not ask if you can tag along and meet this new girl. If he lies about the party then confront him immediately, try not to reveal that you have been snooping though it doesnt bode weel for trust. Can I ask what your relationship is like at the mo? Are you getting on well? The lust still there? How long have you mean together?