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    Out of the blue, my mum decided to sit me down for a serious talk. She told me that she knew I was throwing up and controlling what I was eating and it would lead to things like tooth decay and heart attacks.
    To find out my mum was accusing me of this I got very upset and demanded to know what I had done for her to say things like this. She avoided the question and then told me that she knew people at university that had gone through it and that I had I would have seen my friends do things like that. I disagreed and kept asking why she would think I would do something like that. She just answered that it was because of the stress I was going through at university [Going into second year in October]. I told her that I thought I was coping, that if she was concerned this was because of uni why hadn’t she said these things last year. The conversation ended with her saying that if I ever needed to talk to her I could and that she did love me. So not really sure how to feel anything but extreme sadness at the moment. I have absolutely no idea what made her think that. I haven't lost any weight recently or been on a diet. In fact I've just came back from holiday where I ate so much rubbish. I just feel she doesn't trust me anymore and that I'm doing something wrong. All the confidence I've gained in the last few months seems to have disappeared. I can’t believe she would think I would do something like that.

    If anyone has some advice it would be really appreciated.
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    well bulimics often don't lose much weight - actually a better sign can be eating lots and lots of junk and not gaining weight... it could be something as simple as you having different eating habits since moving away (which is normal to do!) or it could be that she knew/knows many people who struggled at uni and so is very paranoid about it and seeing things which aren't there (not hallucinations but interpreting normal things as disordered behaviour)... if she has reason to be very worried it could be that she's seen you go to the toilet a few times right after meals and panicked even though you're probably just peeing or maybe you coughed in the bathroom the other day and she thought she heard you throwing up

    I would have another chat with her and explain that you honestly do not have a problem with eating and you're quite upset at what your mum said so you want to talk about it together so she can stop worrying and so you don't have to be upset she thinks you're bulimic, see if you can get to why she actually thinks you'd be bulimic further than you being stressed

    unfortunately it might be quite hard as generally people with EDs will lie about what they're doing (before anyone attacked me this is coming from someone who had an eating disorder for years) so she may take all of this as further evidence, in which case you may just have to promise she doesn't need to worry and move on and try not tot hink about it... the positive from this is that your mum obviously cares a lot about you and is being very supportive (even though it's unnecessary!)
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    That's bizarre. She must have thought she was doing the right thing, but I can completely see why this would upset you.
    I would say that you should just keep behaving as you normally would. If there's nothing wrong, then eventually she will realise her mistake.
    If you have found it difficult with stress at uni etc, then maybe it's worth taking up a hobby or seeing a counsellor or something that would probably help to reassure your mum- but don't feel pressured to do it if you genuinely don't see any need.
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    (Original post by doodle_333)
    well bulimics often don't lose much weight - actually a better sign can be eating lots and lots of junk and not gaining weight... it could be something as simple as you having different eating habits since moving away (which is normal to do!) or it could be that she knew/knows many people who struggled at uni and so is very paranoid about it and seeing things which aren't there (not hallucinations but interpreting normal things as disordered behaviour)... if she has reason to be very worried it could be that she's seen you go to the toilet a few times right after meals and panicked even though you're probably just peeing or maybe you coughed in the bathroom the other day and she thought she heard you throwing up

    I would have another chat with her and explain that you honestly do not have a problem with eating and you're quite upset at what your mum said so you want to talk about it together so she can stop worrying and so you don't have to be upset she thinks you're bulimic, see if you can get to why she actually thinks you'd be bulimic further than you being stressed

    unfortunately it might be quite hard as generally people with EDs will lie about what they're doing (before anyone attacked me this is coming from someone who had an eating disorder for years) so she may take all of this as further evidence, in which case you may just have to promise she doesn't need to worry and move on and try not tot hink about it... the positive from this is that your mum obviously cares a lot about you and is being very supportive (even though it's unnecessary!)
    Thank-you! I'll try to have another chat with her.
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    (Original post by Ezme39)
    That's bizarre. She must have thought she was doing the right thing, but I can completely see why this would upset you.
    I would say that you should just keep behaving as you normally would. If there's nothing wrong, then eventually she will realise her mistake.
    If you have found it difficult with stress at uni etc, then maybe it's worth taking up a hobby or seeing a counsellor or something that would probably help to reassure your mum- but don't feel pressured to do it if you genuinely don't see any need.
    Thanks for your advice. I'll try to act as I would and see if that reassures her.
 
 
 
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