LDR = Definately Cheating? Watch

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yakeyak
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#1
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#1
Me and my gf are about to enter into a 3 year LDR and whenever I mention this to people recently they all say that "she'll definately cheat on you if your long distance". Now I realise this is a ridiculous idea and a horrible generalisation but with so many people commenting it got me wondering how many people have cheated or been cheated on in LDRs or know of people who have; more out of curiosity than anything else.

If nothing else it'll give me armoury against these comments if Im proved right through this i.e. that plenty of people dont.
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grace
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#2
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#2
i've been cheated on in a LDR. never cheated myself though.
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Adhsur
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#3
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Is it university that is splitting you up or some other reason? Because obviously it really depends on how necessary it is to get into an LDR in the first place.
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bunthulhu
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I've never cheated in an LDR. And as far as I'm aware, nor have my partners.
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khil
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#5
Well my sister has never cheated on her bf - and I certainly don't think her bf has either. I've met the guy before - he's the sweet, shy, adorable sort - I certainly can't imagine him cheating on my sister, considering he stayed in England for her! He's in Wales and my sis is in Scotland.

You could say I'm "technically" conducting a mini LDR cus my bf lives in Germany, so I won't see him til Sep when he comes back for uni. And no, neither of us has ever cheated on the other. He would tell me if he did - I know the guilt would eat him up that he will HAVE to tell me if he ever did cheat on me.

My parents stayed apart for a year, one in England and the other in HK, and neither of them cheated on the other. In fact, I think our neighbour was interested in my mum before dad came to England too, and I still remember, my mum asked me, when I was 9, if I could stay in the lounge with her when the niehgbour visits for a cup of tea. She didn't want to give him any opportunities to attempt anything, and I know she avoided all opportunities to be alone with him.
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yakeyak
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#6
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#6
Yes LDR is due to different unis
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dh00001
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#7
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#7
not everyone cheats. some will, some wont.
if you begin to wonder if you are being cheated on and grow paranoid it will eat you up inside, then if you develop trust issues it will **** both you and your relationship up.
really you need to think if you trust this person not to cheat on you, no do you think that will.
(that makes little sense. i know what i mean :p: )
Music_Enthusiast
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#8
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I didn't cheat, but I ended the relationship after about a month of it becoming LD at my uni.
ma2k5
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nvm [edit]
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bunthulhu
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#10
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#10
(Original post by ma2k5)
What is LDR?
Long Distance Relationship
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. sav .
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#11
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#11
I've had... 3 LDRs... 1 cheated, 2 didnt.

its strength of mind. Uni is a hard change though. I cant say i know many couples that have stayed together when theyve both gone to uni... Sorry.
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Goodkat
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#12
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I tried the LDR scenario a couple of years ago and ended up cheating on my gf on a drunken night out. I had intended to end it before this however, as I really didn't have the trust needed for a relationship, especially a LDR. I really find it hard to trust people so a LDR, especially at that age, definitely couldn't have worked for me.
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ciara
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#13
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I've been in an LDR and we didn't cheat. We did break up though. My advice is to just see how it goes, don't overthink it all, if it's right you'll be fine.
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Rock Fan
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People who say she will definiately cheat are full of crap.
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socialist cook
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#15
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My boyfriend and I have a LDR.

We met at the same University but then in the holidays he lived in Leicester I lived in Plymouth.

Last year after he graduated I went on a Year Abroad and studied in Spain for 9 months.

He now lives in Durham and I live in Plymouth.

Our relationship has survived and we haven't cheated on one another at all, mainly because I know I can trust him and he knows he can trust me. We didn't go into it blindly though, I do remember talking with him before going to Spain and saying "if you or I meet someone better then we shouldn't feel any loyalty to each other" but in both our cases that never happened.

We've always been fairly independent from the start of our 2 3/4 year relationship, given the year difference at University(he was the year above) and the physical distances during the holidays. But at the same time, he's always found time to email me daily or twice a day, write to me when I was in Spain. We also talk daily on the phone now that I'm back in Plymouth.

Therefore for someone to generalise and say all Long Distance Relationships are opportunities to cheat are just doing that-generalising. Every couple is different but if you want it to succeed it will.
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billbonesknowswhatimean
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#16
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bigamy's underrated
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Jelkin
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#17
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(Original post by irisng)
I certainly can't imagine him cheating on my sister, considering he stayed in England for her! He's in Wales and my sis is in Scotland.
Heh heh heh. [Sorry.]
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herbal bug
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#18
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#18
OP- i hate that generalisation. I'm in a LDR and my boyfriend lives over 4000 miles away .
i would never cheat. never.
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charliehelyes
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#19
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#19
people who say she will defitnatly cheat are just jealus that you have a strong enough relationship to go long distance. My gf lives 150 miles away but we still see each other every week by coach and no none of us would cheat.
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jh_1988_england
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#20
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#20
haha i thought ldr was lie detector results ...newaaay...u shudnt worry
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