Will I Make Friends At College?

I only had a handful of close friends in secondary school (and then other groups I'd talk to in class) but I've just started college and only have one friend with me. Everyone else seems to have groups of people with them so despite talking to people in class, they ultimately return to their group at break.

Does it just take people a while to make new friends? Or do people tend to stick to their old groups?

I would very much appreciate people sharing their college/sixth form experience. No rude comments please, I know some may think this is a stupid question but I honestly feel very anxious and isolated.

Reply 1

username1292215

To be fair it depends, sometimes people are very welcoming while other times people stick. You can still make friends, if you are extroverted then put yourself out there and if you are introverted then you can become friends with the people who sit closest to you in lessons then see how it goes from there :smile:

. Also remember to always make an effort

Reply 2

neriine

I stayed at my school's sixth form - with most of my friends since year 7 - but we had almost 50% newcomers in my year. It was a really natural process that everyone made friends with each other and, apart from a few wilfully nasty people, we were a really close year group. On our first few days we played large card games in the communal areas (like Cards Against Humanity, etc) and new people joined in all the time. It was a great way to get to know everyone and break the ice! (But make sure to introduce yourself by name to new people - one girl in my squad made it to christmas without half the squad knowing her name ;u v u)

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by SuperHuman98

. Also remember to always make an effort

I'm trying to. I've only been going two days so I know I can't expect to make friends yet. But I see distance friends/acquaintances from school talking to new people already whereas I'm just with my friend from my old school during my frees and at break. I talk to people in class and smile and talk to them whenever an opportunity comes up. But I feel really shy and I'm not really sure how to keep the conversation going once we've covered what subjects we're doing/what school we're from. It just seems to stop. Have you got any advice?

Reply 4

username1292215

Original post by Anonymous

yeah always say hi, and ask them questions about themselves. people love to talk about themselves

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

I'm in the exact situation as you. When did you start?

I'm really anxious about the future. I only know a handful of people (from my old school) and I feel like I'll drift away from them and have nobody. It feels like everyone knows each other and no one wants to talk to me and I'm doomed to 2 years being isolated. I'll just keep skipping breaks and study I guess.

Reply 6

Wirefox

Don't worry about it!
It takes me ages to try and talk to new people because I get nervous...
What I suggest is to try and always appear friendly and welcoming, say hello to people and perhaps if you hear them talking about something which you are familiar with then just say something!

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

Started Monday. I know it may seem silly to worry about not making friends this early in, but for the last year of high school I really drifted from a lot of people. I've never had a group of close friends, just a couple which would change every few years. All the girls seem so much prettier than me, I feel awkward talking to them (not feeling spiteful towards them, just a bit inadequate. I'm also gay, so I feel awkward around pretty girl regardless of my self esteem).

Reply 8

megs_13

Hey! I am in the same position, i have 1 friend from my old school and that's it. I'm not that close to her and she's making new friends already so i'm basically alone. My advice (and what i'm doing) is to make a really big effort to become good friends with these people in lessons. I know it probably seems **** now because you feel like you're intruding on peoples friendships but remember that you're 2 days in - everyone (believe it or not) is scared and if they have them will probably go back to their old friends to remain safe. After a few more weeks I'm definitely sure that this will change and hopefully then it will be easier to hang around with the people at breaks, frees etc. Just ask them questions like 'What are you doing this lunch? do you want to grab a coffee?' it sounds ridiculous and awkward but they will probably be happy that you want to be friends with them. Good luck, I'm hoping all goes well. We're in this together!! :smile:

Reply 9

o0obritney

Original post by Anonymous

I've just started my second year of college and when I started college I was expecting to meet loads of new people and make new friends. Unfortunately this didn't happen, I have about 2 friends, I speak to people in my lessons but it doesn't go further than that because like your college they all go back to their own friend groups. If my whole friend group had come with me to college I probably wouldn't want to stray from them so I do understand the "cliques".
I don't want this post to make you anxious about not making any new friends because you may well do, maybe after a couple months people will get more comfortable with eachother.
Hope this helps :smile: