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Problem with friend and girlfriend...

Just started going out with this girl i like last sunday... then we went to a club the next night, bumped into a friend of mine and she said "omg... is Sarah your girlfriend?!?!" I said "yeh... we got together yesterday" then she said "Didn't you know Andrew (A friend of mine and a friend of hers too) has feelings for Sarah?"

Now Andrew found out that night in the club, he has been telling a close friend of mine that he is not happy seeing me and Sarah together... the fact that i didn't know he had feelings for her too otherwise i wouldn't have asked her out because that would make the friendship between me and Andrew some what weird...

What on earth should i do? =S I don't want to lose a friend but i don't want to lose Sarah either as i really like her! Save my friendship with Andrew or split up with Sarah? =S

Reply 1

BabyBee

I'd talk to Andrew - say that you didn't know he liked her, and that you like her too but you don't want to lose a friend. He should be reasonable, he doesn't have a claim over her and you never intentially went to hurt him.

Also, talk to her, maybe you and her can take it slow to be sensitive to Andrews feelings.

Reply 2

mudblood

1

If he's a friend of yours he should be happy for you - if they were going to get together it would've happened before you got with her and he should know that (even if he doesn't want to admit it).

Reply 3

arminvanpite

14

It's one of those situations where nobody says anything and then it all comes out when something happens. He didn't know that you liked her or he'd probably have said something, and vice versa, so you were both going to eventually find out when either one of you got with her or when she got with someone else. It's sod's law, really. Talk to him though and if he's going to be stupid about it, let him be, 'cos he'll more than likely go off sulking for a few days then come out of it.

Reply 4

Xx Tomásíona - Mháire xX

14

Syxxthmunky

Just started going out with this girl i like last sunday... then we went to a club the next night, bumped into a friend of mine and she said "omg... is Sarah your girlfriend?!?!" I said "yeh... we got together yesterday" then she said "Didn't you know Andrew (A friend of mine and a friend of hers too) has feelings for Sarah?"

Now Andrew found out that night in the club, he has been telling a close friend of mine that he is not happy seeing me and Sarah together... the fact that i didn't know he had feelings for her too otherwise i wouldn't have asked her out because that would make the friendship between me and Andrew some what weird...

What on earth should i do? =S I don't want to lose a friend but i don't want to lose Sarah either as i really like her! Save my friendship with Andrew or split up with Sarah? =S

Just explain to him that you didn't know that he liked your new girlfriend. You are stuck in between a rock and a hard place unfortunately :frown:

But see how things go, if he's a true friend he'll forgive you as you weren't the wiser to know and for your girlfriend, it's not fair to break up with her over this, after all it means that neither of you will get to go out with her.

But good luck with you decision.

Reply 5

Syxxthmunky

OP

1

I did talk to him when i found out from my friend that Andrew likes Sarah too, had a word with him outside in the club and said to him i had no idea... he said it was ok, and he told me to go for it but i still couldn't help but feel awkward in this situation still.

But the day after, he's been talking to my friend and others too that he is actually not hapy about me and Sarah getting together...

Mudblood:

Andrew would of got together with Sarah earlier but it's the fact that he was involved with someone at that time so he didn't make the move...

Bloodredbeat:

Yeh this situation sucks! I don't wanna lose a good friend over a girl, i mean we all hang out together aswell. People say boyfriend's and girlfriend's come and go but friend's don't, that phrase has been stuck in my head when my friend said that to me last year...

Reply 6

mudblood

1

Syxxthmunky

Mudblood:

Andrew would of got together with Sarah earlier but it's the fact that he was involved with someone at that time so he didn't make the move...

I don't want to sound harsh but it is his fault - and it was unfair to string along a previous girlfriend when he was wanting somebody else. I really hope that he'll learn to accept you and Sarah as a couple. :smile:

Reply 7

devils_nose

10

He's given you the green light already, enjoy your new relationship.. its an honest mistake though, he'll get over it. Next time he likes a girl he will move faster, no?

Reply 8

devils_nose

10

devils_nose

He's given you the green light already, enjoy your new relationship.. its an honest mistake though, he'll get over it. Next time he likes a girl he will move faster, no?

Oh this boy already had a girlfriend? Well, its not like you're meant to be a mindreader - in a relationship means he can stake no claims elsewhere!! Jeez, this guys wants to eat cake and everything!! Don't let him make you feel bad!!

Reply 9

Profesh

20

Well, Andrew had dibs: obviously the sentiments of everybody else regarding this matter (including those of Sarah herself) can be of no meaningful consequence.

Reply 10

Syxxthmunky

OP

1

Thanks for the opinions all, much appreciated!

I'll see how things go, i'll call him and stuff and talk to him like normal, gonna be awkward though!

Problem with friend and girlfriend...

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