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    I've been thinking about quitting medical school for the last 6 months. I am only in second year but feel like I don't fit in and don't really have any friends.

    I am enjoying the course work and the work level isn't too much- I have been getting good grades. However, it is the city and the people in the medical school that are exhausting.

    I've been trying to make friends outside of medicine but it hasn't really worked and I think I am becoming more and more depressed because I feel trapped.

    I have tried to speak to staff but some are just overly patronising and some really do not understand because they come from really wealthy backgrounds.

    I love medicine and working with patients, I just don't know if I would love being a doctor and having to work in such an egg shelled environment with the same type of people as those in my med school.

    Neither of my parents went to university and most of my friends from high school didn't either so they cannot really support me or understand my problem.

    Any advice would be GREATLY appreciated!
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    It really would be a pity for you to drop out as you've probably worked very hard to get here and get good grades. Are you sure this is what you want and you won't regret it later? What else would you want to do with your life? Instead of med school staff seek help from advice and counselling or the equivalent at the uni and see if you can work through what you're feeling, what needs to change for you to feel better and whether quitting and doing something else is a good option.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been thinking about quitting medical school for the last 6 months. I am only in second year but feel like I don't fit in and don't really have any friends.

    I am enjoying the course work and the work level isn't too much- I have been getting good grades. However, it is the city and the people in the medical school that are exhausting.

    I've been trying to make friends outside of medicine but it hasn't really worked and I think I am becoming more and more depressed because I feel trapped.

    I have tried to speak to staff but some are just overly patronising and some really do not understand because they come from really wealthy backgrounds.

    I love medicine and working with patients, I just don't know if I would love being a doctor and having to work in such an egg shelled environment with the same type of people as those in my med school.

    Neither of my parents went to university and most of my friends from high school didn't either so they cannot really support me or understand my problem.

    Any advice would be GREATLY appreciated!
    Get down to your SU (there are always friendly faces there) or speak to a professional about your worries. I'm not going to be insensitive and say "you've worked really hard just carry on" your mental health is very important and you should put it first whenever possible.
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    This is sad to hear. I hope you don't drop out because even if you don't want to do medicine as a career, the degree can open many doors.

    Talk to your personal advisor and voice your concerns! Regarding friends, do you live with medics? If so then make friends of their friends and perhaps join a medic society
    • #2
    #2

    Hey, I'm a second year med student and I can find it extremely lonely at times, and I also struggle with the personalities of some of the students. Everyone is very confident and assertive, whereas I'm more quiet and a listener.

    From what I've seen, the personalities of the people largely affect which specialty they end up going for (although thats very cliché)- so you probably won't find the same issues in your later career. It's also about creating that work-life balance which everyone talks about.

    I would really suggest that dropping out is not the best way forward though. You enjoy the work and you've done well to get so far.

    Some of the things I'm going to do this year to help myself, which maybe you could try, are: regular counselling sessions with the uni, joining a sport outside of the medical society, and planning my career more long term.

    If you do decide to drop out, just make sure you have tried everything else first, otherwise you could risk regretting it
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    I am just entering my 3rd year and I have been going through something similar to you for my first two years. I am from a completely different background to everyone else here at university, I feel like I just don't fit in, and my friends from back home don't understand either. But I try to look at the positive side of it; which is that I have more time to study and spend on myself. It has made me so much more independent and stronger mentally. You need to understand that this is not what your medical career will be like forever, you graduate and then you will be able to move to a area where you will feel more at home. I am personally waiting for my clinical years to come because the main reason why I wanted to do this was for the patient interaction (which has been very very minimal so far).
    • #3
    #3

    To me it sounds like you're dropping out for the wrong reasons, ultimately, you've gone to school to be a doctor. And if you don't like the social inequalities in medicine (it's a wealthy person's degree, essentially - "rich kids get the best grades etc."), then be the change!

    I'm also from a working class background and have been hit by a culture shock at medical school due to that inequality. You will find your people. I found my people in third year. They're amazing.

    Keep trying new things, but don't feel like you HAVE TO get on with everyone. Be confident within yourself NOT to laugh at a joke that you don't find funny or not to be pressured to go out if you don't want to. Don't conform. Be yourself. Your people will find you and it'll be worth the wait.
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    Oh no - I really hope you manage to stick with it, as it would be very sad to give up on something you're enjoying for this reason. And Medicine needs people from a variety of backgrounds! :yep: That said, your mental wellbeing is paramount - if you're feeling overwhelmed, don't forget that you can always take a leave of absence to get yourself back on track. That way you wouldn't be burning your bridges, and you'd also be in a different year group when you came back (i.e. lots of new people to make friends with). Due to intercalations, exam fails and health issues, lots of people drop down a year at some point in medical school, so you wouldn't stick out like a sore thumb, I promise.

    Do you have any hobbies, or recreational activities that you'd like to try? Sport (even if team sports aren't your thing, there are running clubs, climbing clubs, cycling clubs etc), student journalism, book clubs, film societies, activist groups? Any of these might be a way to make new friends.

    One more thing: as you move into third year, you'll start clinical placements. If your med school is anything like mine, you will rarely be with the same people from one placement to the next. This is a great way to meet people in your year group who you otherwise might not have ended up speaking to. Ask people on your placements what their plans are for e.g. the weekend, and ask if you can join them. People will be more receptive than you think.

    I understand with the money thing - I wasn't from a wealthy family either, and it was difficult at times. I know a lot of people (me included) who worked part-time throughout medical school, which would not only make you more comfortable financially, but would potentially also lead to new friends.

    Good luck - you can do this. *
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    Don't drop out, stick to it and meet people in societies etc
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    I also hope you don't feel the need to drop out of medical school for this reason. Surely your medical school cohort isn't so narrow that it only includes one type of person? If so, that's not representative of the profession as a whole and you will probably find that there are whole specialties full of people you are comfortable working with. Expand your social circle beyond the medical school if you have to but it would be a huge shame to drop out because of the people. Working as a doctor is fascinating and often lots of fun.
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    Every year has ends of bells in it, medicine needs students from all backgrounds to apply, talk with your uni about support and they'll get you through it. I despise the arrogant ones in my course too but there are enough normal ones to cope.
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    i'm a doctor now I know where you're coming from,

    Please dont quit medicine if you do actually enjoy it, Just stick out the next few years ( you will be surprised by how quickly time flies by) get your degree and then you'll never have to see these people again or live in this city.
    And I know what you mean by medics and the typical personality, but you WILL get to know some cool people. And people change a lot from 2nd year to 5th year. Also have you tried joining societies at your uni? really good way to meet non medics students

    Hang in there.
    • #4
    #4

    [QUOTE=abitemoleste;68322642]Hey,
    I know exactly where you're coming from! Last year, I was very close to dropping out for the same reasons- not "fitting in" and not being able to really talk to anyone about it as no one knew where I was coming from, neither of my parents nor many of my school friends went to uni either. Most of my close friends are actually non medics and I met them through pushing myself to go along to meetings/societies alone and talking to new people. I really don't like the "medic culture" and try to avoid it where possible but it is important to have a couple of close friends who you can rely on to go for a coffee and share notes. I found it difficult to make medic friends I have things in common with as we're given set timetables with people we have to try and get on with but might not necessarily be the people we would choose to be around.

    What's changed for me this year is trying to be more confident, moving to be closer to friends and trying to socialise as much as possible and not worry about work as it will get done. One of my close medic friends is good friends with a nice group so I've made more of an effort to get to know these people and it's helped a lot!

    You can do it! If you want to be a doctor, go for it! You did well to make it to med school. Ignore those around you and don't change because of them, we need well rounded, down to earth doctors who love what they do.
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    As a medical student..do you have any things that you had wished you done before or any general advice for an alevel student like myself who is wanting to do medicine. However some of my family and friends suggested dentistry too so I don't know which ones really meant for me? From your experience what would you have done?


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    • #5
    #5

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been thinking about quitting medical school for the last 6 months. I am only in second year but feel like I don't fit in and don't really have any friends.

    I am enjoying the course work and the work level isn't too much- I have been getting good grades. However, it is the city and the people in the medical school that are exhausting.

    I've been trying to make friends outside of medicine but it hasn't really worked and I think I am becoming more and more depressed because I feel trapped.

    I have tried to speak to staff but some are just overly patronising and some really do not understand because they come from really wealthy backgrounds.

    I love medicine and working with patients, I just don't know if I would love being a doctor and having to work in such an egg shelled environment with the same type of people as those in my med school.

    Neither of my parents went to university and most of my friends from high school didn't either so they cannot really support me or understand my problem.

    Any advice would be GREATLY appreciated!

    Out of interest, what med school is this? Because mine is very similar (liverpool)
    Honestly just find a non-medic society for whatever you find interesting, or get a part time job - these are great ways to meet non medics and to get away from that bubble! stick at it if you actually enjoy the course itself, cos youll regret dropping out. Definitely speak to GP if youre feeling low mood and perhaps think about counselling - i had a few cbt sessions and they were actually really helpful.

    Dont let other people affect your goals and aims in life. You can do it OP!!
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    (Original post by AngelinAugustine)
    As a medical student..do you have any things that you had wished you done before or any general advice for an alevel student like myself who is wanting to do medicine. However some of my family and friends suggested dentistry too so I don't know which ones really meant for me? From your experience what would you have done?


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    Do dentistry if you want money and a 9-5 life.
    Do medicine if youre more interested in talking to humans and researching them.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been thinking about quitting medical school for the last 6 months. I am only in second year but feel like I don't fit in and don't really have any friends.

    I am enjoying the course work and the work level isn't too much- I have been getting good grades. However, it is the city and the people in the medical school that are exhausting.

    I've been trying to make friends outside of medicine but it hasn't really worked and I think I am becoming more and more depressed because I feel trapped.

    I have tried to speak to staff but some are just overly patronising and some really do not understand because they come from really wealthy backgrounds.

    I love medicine and working with patients, I just don't know if I would love being a doctor and having to work in such an egg shelled environment with the same type of people as those in my med school.

    Neither of my parents went to university and most of my friends from high school didn't either so they cannot really support me or understand my problem.

    Any advice would be GREATLY appreciated!
    Oh mate I can understand, my parents didn't go to uni either looks like we have a similar working class background. I say stick with it or try transfer to a different medical school which is renowned for its student environment Manchester I know is a good student city. I don't whether this is possible I've been out of the medical school game for a while so not upto date with this but you sound like a good fella. If medicine isn't the problem stick with it go out with societies that isn't medicine because as you mentioned there are smug **** suckers in there, if your into a sport go out with them or another society, I promise you will meet normal people like yourself
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    (Original post by AngelinAugustine)
    As a medical student..do you have any things that you had wished you done before or any general advice for an alevel student like myself who is wanting to do medicine. However some of my family and friends suggested dentistry too so I don't know which ones really meant for me? From your experience what would you have done?


    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Do dentistry for a good work life balance and the money

    Doing medicine is nice but nowadays the NHS contracts, the hours and the money makes it unattractive from that perspective don't want to put you off at all but it's something to genuinely consider. But being a doctor is one of the most rewarding careers there is. You probably know most of this stuff your considering med school
 
 
 
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