boyfriend

Soz this is a long post!

My boyfriend and I have been arguing this past week, though I am unsure y it started. It started about tues I noticed he had been acting funny towards me, this carried onto wed and thurs. We were communicating on facebk n mid chat he would leave or take ages to reply to me. I queried this he said facebook shows you offline if ur idle for 10 mins??
We started talkin on msn n he got really rude towards me, in the end he left saying he reached his limit. I didnt know y he was acting this way n getting annoyed so easily. I hadnt done anything n he was just taking everthing out on me. We talked later that night n same thing happened when I told him he was being out of order. His reply was I dont wanna speak to u anymore, ur such a nag!
Then fri last night we were talking he was again getting really pissy.
He apologised n i missed it in this long paragraph he has written n when i said he hadnt apologised. He left without saying anything. I was trying to give him the benefit of the doubt bout the whole offline thing but when he came bk he admitted he left cause he was angry I was saying things about him that werent true!
I apologised it was a honesty mistake, n explained i had missed it, he then made out I was falsely accusing him.
After bit more of convo he started swearing at me, n left saying that I really am pissing him off n he didnt wanna speak to me anymore.
He then sent me a msg 2day having a go at me, n said i cant admit when I'm wrong!

Anyways basically I dont understand y he is being so abuse towards me, I dunno wot was wrong with him to start this all off cause he wudnt say. If I stand up 4 myself about how is treating me he has a go n says im pissing him off n he's leaving.

Through all this I havent said horrible things to him in retaliation cause the way I see it,its ur partner who u love so y wud u treat them like crap, n say horrible things if u know it will hurt them! I am soz to say he is being self absorbed cause he wont listen to wot i have to say at all or look at his own behaviour, I didnt provoke him so I dont get y he is treating me like ****. :confused:

Reply 1

poetic_harriyot

If I were you I'd leave it a few days, give him room to cool off and then arrange to meet him somewhere you can talk... but without pressure. Meet somewhere neutral (coffee shop, park, etc) and maintain a neutral position. It might just be that he was having a bad day. If he carries on in the same way I'd be seriously considering whether I wanted to stay with someone who treated me that badly.

Reply 2

generalebriety

16

Have you ever thought you might just have done something to upset him without realising? All you've told us here is what he did. I'm sure he has a side to the story too, and I'd go with poetic_harriyot's suggestion, go and talk to him properly and find out what's going on.

Reply 3

username47781

20

Any chance you could use proper english and not text talk?

Anyway as the others say give it a day or two for him to cool off then talk to each other and find out why you are arguing.

Reply 4

Anannya

8

Give him some time to cool off. If he still acts like he is an bad mood then then try to talk calmly about the situation and ask him what's wrong. If he still does not react nicely, well then you have a potential jerk at your hand.

Reply 5

campbell87

8

Lay off him for a few days, the pair of you need to have space from each other to clear your heads, give it a little bit of time then arrange to go out, talk face to face instead of over the internet, its more personal that way and you can really interpret things much better, tones in voice, experssions, body language etc.
It sounds to me that either you have upset him without realising it (we all do this from time to time so don't see it as your getting all the blame here) or it could just be that this relationship has run its course, for him atleast and he is stuck in a limbo of to carry on or not. Like its been said, I think you both need to have a little space and time to cool off and then reasses the situation.

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

OP

Well we talked about it yesterday and he said on wednesday when it all started that when I was asking him what was bothering him, he didnt want to say, so when I asked him like three times he felt I was "nagging him" ,thats why he acting like a jerk. However he didnt tell me this during the convo, so he made out like I was pestering him when if he had told me in this 1st place, then this whole arguement would not have happened!

There were two things which I did which annoyed him, during the arguement which he didnt like, thats what he told me during our talk yesterday.

He did say something was bothering him,something I said to him last week but said it wasnt a big deal and hasnt told me yet what it is yet.

Yes there are two sides but instead of telling me something was wrong he decided he wouldnt tell he didnt want to talk about it then. When I confronted him about it yesterday during our talk he didnt come up with any excuses all he said was yeah I didnt wanna tell you I didnt want to talk about what was bothering me.

The problem is he is not too much of an open person and when there is something wrong he wont tell me, I have an issue with this, instead he takes out his emotions on me. He has acted this way be4 but not as bad (i.e swearing).

boyfriend

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