Is it too late to make friends in 2nd year?

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    Ok so I am heading into my 2nd year of uni in a few days, and I'll admit that last year I let my anxiety get the better of me and I didn't make as many friends who I connect with as I would have liked to. I'm very introverted, I can't stand parties for the life of me and don't like drinking, I just prefer chilling at a restaurant or a cool event or having a movie night.

    I know that at uni there's gonna be people who also don't like parties like me, but the trouble is, my uni is known for its crazy nightlife and everyone there loves to go clubbing so it's a lot harder to find those people.

    Last year I didn't join as many societies or activities that I could have, so this year i am not going to make that mistake again and I am going to join loads of societies to hopefully find some people I connect with. But i'm still a bit anxious about the situation. Is it too late? I'm worried i'll show up to the society meets and it will be 2nd years with their close knit friendship groups or first years who are not interested in talking to 2nd years.

    I guess what I am trying to say is, is there anything more that I can do to try and find friends? I built up my years at uni in my head to be the best time of my life where I would finally feel at peace with my life but so far it has been the complete opposite.
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    Hi there,

    I know how you feel about your anxiety getting in the way of making friends. Since I was so scared of being rejected or being thought of as weird, I almost always worked by myself in classes unless someone asked me if I wanted to work with them, and as a result I made no friends on my course. However, I did manage to make a few friends by joining a society, and this was during second term rather than the beginning of the year!

    The thing that you need to consider is that people's friendship groups are constantly changing and expanding. Yes, some people may already be quite close with each other but that doesn't mean that they won't be open to talking to you or getting to know you better. I think it's a great idea to join more societies as you could tag along on socials and hopefully the society execs will be trying to get you involved, asking you questions etc. It's just a case of persevering and continuing to invest yourself in going to the sessions. People like us don't tend to make friends straight away so don't be disheartened if you feel that you didn't meet anyone you get along with at first.

    As for first years not being interested in talking to second years, I honestly don't think that would be the case. In first year you're pretty desperate to make friends, and for them to be picky about what year those friends are in seems a bit unlikely to me. Plus, you can offer them advice on how you got through your first year and I'm sure they would appreciate the perspective of someone who has already gone through this transition from home to uni, especially if they happen to be taking the same course as you!

    I hope that this has helped, sorry for the mini essay!
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    (Original post by Claros)
    Hi there,

    I know how you feel about your anxiety getting in the way of making friends. Since I was so scared of being rejected or being thought of as weird, I almost always worked by myself in classes unless someone asked me if I wanted to work with them, and as a result I made no friends on my course. However, I did manage to make a few friends by joining a society, and this was during second term rather than the beginning of the year!

    The thing that you need to consider is that people's friendship groups are constantly changing and expanding. Yes, some people may already be quite close with each other but that doesn't mean that they won't be open to talking to you or getting to know you better. I think it's a great idea to join more societies as you could tag along on socials and hopefully the society execs will be trying to get you involved, asking you questions etc. It's just a case of persevering and continuing to invest yourself in going to the sessions. People like us don't tend to make friends straight away so don't be disheartened if you feel that you didn't meet anyone you get along with at first.

    As for first years not being interested in talking to second years, I honestly don't think that would be the case. In first year you're pretty desperate to make friends, and for them to be picky about what year those friends are in seems a bit unlikely to me. Plus, you can offer them advice on how you got through your first year and I'm sure they would appreciate the perspective of someone who has already gone through this transition from home to uni, especially if they happen to be taking the same course as you!

    I hope that this has helped, sorry for the mini essay!
    Thanks you so so much! This was honestly so reassuring and helpful, i'll definitely try my best to just put myself out there and not hold back at society socials. I'm glad you found some friends, I hope I do as well
 
 
 
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