The Student Room Group

advice please =]

im 17 soon and i still havent kissed a guy.
is this something to be worried about?
most of my mates have had boyfriends and have slept with them and when they talk about it, i feel stupid and small.
i want my first kiss to be special or is that just stupid and should i just get it over and done with?
im scared that when it comes around to it, im going to be so nervous and the guy will laugh.
or boys really bothered about stuff like this?
help or advice please from both boys and girls?

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Reply 1
Awwww, don't be daft. :smile:

There's no set age that you have to do it by. I know some people who are 23 and still haven't done it yet.

Your mates who are talking about sleeping with their boyfriends could eventually end up regretting having done it at such a young age.

There's absolutely nothing wrong at all with waiting until the time is right. If anything, it's to be admired. :smile:

And when it comes to your frist kiss, trust me, it'll just feel right and your nerves will disappear right away.

You do what feels right to you, and don't worry about what your mates are doing. :hugs:
anonymous, i am in the same situation except i havent kissed a girlbut what keeps me going is knowing that one day the special person will come along and i will kiss them for as much as i want
Reply 3
clearvisionafterdeath
one day the special person will come along and i will kiss them for as much as i want

uh oh, rapist alert

:p:
Reply 4
Some boys may find it weird I guess, but that's because in my experience most of them just like getting with different girls, as opposed to wanting it to be special (no offence guys :smile:). You don't have to tell the guy though, and he won't know any different!
pipsipops
uh oh, rapist alert

:p:


^^^ better send the special person a txt to warn her
Yeah there really isn't anything to worried about at all. I was in this position like 4 or 5 months ago and i was abolutely scared ****less. But on the day me an my ex met up i was nervous all the way up to meeting her and when we were finally together in person i felt a lot more relaxed. And when it actually came to kissing her it was really weird because i wasnt that nervous even though she'd kissed one or two guys before and i had no dating experience at all. If it helps it was also the first time i'd met her lool, we'd met online. It might sound sad to some people but it was really quite cool :smile:

The thing about a first kiss is that people can build it up a lot and its not as big a deal as people make. Exactly like sex for a matter of fact lol, people build that up to be such a huge thing but once you've actually had sex, its no where near as big a deal as you once thought it was.

Best advice i can give you is just relax and dont build it up to be a life changing event.

P.s. I would suggest you wait until you meet the right person, you'll most likely want to remeber your first kiss and if its with some random stranger it won't be the greatest memory.
Take a look at all the 21 y/o virgin threads. Its nothing to worry about.
Don't worry about it. I was 18 before I first kissed a guy - then all of a sudden I ended up kissing loads of guys and getting boyfriends. Just don't worry about it - honestly it's no big deal. xxx
i'm drunk as a skunk.

i love you.
Reply 10
God there are too many of these threads.

OP: Do not ever compare yourself to other people. You're not them. It's not happened for you yet because it's not meant to have happened yet. Tell me this. Would you rather your first time (kissing or otherwise) be with a guy whose name you can't remember the next morning, or with someone who you care about and feels the same about you? Wait for the right one.
Reply 11
it isn't really a big deal, it probably just feels like it. i personally wouldn't wait forever for one special moment though, after it's done it's probably a bit of a disappointment after all this build up.
Reply 12
Waiting for the right person to have your first kiss with? Are you kidding?
Reply 13
brockham
Waiting for the right person to have your first kiss with? Are you kidding?


lol, I agree here. Kissing is no big deal really, and the first kiss doesn't exactly mean much. I mean I can hardly even remember my first kiss but I don't care. It's not like it's your virginity which some people seem to want to keep for that 'special person', it is just a kiss. :s-smilie:
there's no big deal not having kissed someone, i personally wish i'd waited and had my first kiss with someone i actually liked, it's much nicer to have it as a lovely memory than an uncomfortable moment. when it happens i can all but promise you he won't know...if it meant to happen it'll happen and if the chemistry is there the kiss is always good!best nopt stress about it though cos other wise you'll either be too nervous and miss the moment or else forget ot enjoy it.don't rush yourself
pipsipops
uh oh, rapist alert

:p:



Hahahaha, that made me lol.

Yes, clearvisionafterdeath.. you must make sure it's okay! :p:
i now it is a bit meaningles your first kiss i was 15 when i had mine and i was a late blumer among my peers and the whwere ****, utter ***** about it where as i didnt ssee the big deal.

she was 18 and a student nurse we used to play footie nere by on there groundds and one day my mates startet shouting up to ther window after seeing them walk by a few times.
the 3 that normally walked by where all stunners .
but there was a 4th and that was my first kiss and i was rubbish but i had got it out the way and it was like a weight off my shoulders.

the girls in question is still known as the "honey monster" amongst friends.

so try not to worry about it i don't really rate girls that i've kissed either , each one is different so i would'nt waste your tjme worrying.
nah don't worry about it! I was 17 when I had my first kiss, he was my first boyfriend and I'm still with him now..

It's really nothing to get worked up about, but I know exactly how you feel because I felt the same way!

Whether you wait for the 'right person' is completely up to you. Personally I'm glad I did...not because I think kissing is a big deal or anything, but purely beacuse it's a nice memory :smile:
I wouldn't worry about the guy laughing or anything like that..if he's someone who has the same feelings back then he's likely to be as nervous as you, whether he's kissed someone before or not.
as cliche as it sounds, it really does come naturally. People kiss in diferent ways, and unless you tell him, he wont ever know it's your first kiss.
Reply 18
Have you thought about biting the bullet, paying a tramp and just getting it out of the way?
Reply 19
As Music_Enthusiast said, look at all the "I'm a 21yr old virgin" threads that are created every month. There is nothing wrong with you and sooner or later, you will meet a guy and you won't have anything to worry about since kissing is one of the most natural things in the world.