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I'm a second year and don't have many friends - any advice? Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter

    Hi guys,

    This Sunday I'm moving into my house for university and living with my flatmates from last year. I didn't go to freshers this year because my birthday fell inside it and I wanted to spend it with my family at home. The problem is, outside of my housemates, I don't have many friends. Only one other person invites me out to do stuff, but even he has started to drift away from me since he's made other friends. I don't really feel a special bond with my housemates either. Last year, towards the end especially, I started to avoid them as much as I could for no reason. I was quite homesick at the beginning of last year so spent quite a lot of time in my room whilst they were socialising with each other. I will look to spend more time with them this year but I feel like I have social anxiety, and the chances are that I will spend a lot of time in my room again. At the beginning of last year I tried to join some societies but none of them really interested me. I do have a few "acquaintances" who if I saw around campus I would say hello to, but I can't say I have many friends.
    Any advice?
    • #2

    I have this problem too. Because of some reasons and situations I experienced, I kinda suffer from social anxiety and have it difficult to connect with people. Also, I'm very introverted and enjoy more being alone in my room than going out and putting up with people I barely know. I get really tired when I have to.
    I would like to know what to do too, but it's difficult to take advices in these situations, because it all depends on who you are and how you experience and handle these things. I guess it's just a matter of figuring out how to approach people in a way you'll feel comfortable. Sometimes, at least to me, the problem is that the people who I think I'd feel glad to be with don't exist here.
    I can't give you any advice since I'm in the same situation, but I'll tell you what I do. I prefer not to give it too much importance or to get obssesed with it. I try not to feel like I'm not doing something wrong just because I don't have a big group of friends to hang out with, or because I don't do what other people do. Find someone you can talk to, even if he/she doesn't live nearby. Get to express yourself, take it easy. If you're relaxed, things will flow much more easily. If you have the chance, say hi to somebody and ask them a few questions, even if you're not really interested, cause you know sometimes appearances can be deceiving. Eventually, someone will come up.
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