The Student Room Group

Can't stop thinking about her

OK so here's the deal,

I'm 20 and for the past couple of weeks Ive been working in Manchester. I've got to know this girl at work really well...we chat nearly all day long and we never struggle to find something to talk about. She's lives in Stockport so not too far from me. Basically Ive become attracted to her through her personality, I dont think Ive ever got on with a girl so well before. We make each other laugh etc. and enjoy each others company. I find myself more attracted to her physically now because her personality is so great.

She has never mentioned a boyfriend in all our conversations. I assumed she didnt have one so was thinking of asking her out. It turns out that she does have a long term bf, as I found out from a female colleague of mine. Did she omit to mention that she had a bf on purpose because she was interested in me? Should I tell her how I feel or just try and forget about her?
gd ol stockport.
erm yeh maybe she does find you attractive an all but i think the main reason why she did'nt mention it cos she mite 'av got less attention off you if she did.

i was in a similiar kind of situation although this bird jus ahd a casuel relationship going on and i was to much of a coward to express my feelings on the situation.

just try not to think about it until you get a chance to influence the outcome.
its will run your life other wise i found.
Reply 2
She might just be very friendly towards you?
Reply 3
maybe she thinks that if she told u, u might act differently towards her n she finds your friendship so good that she doesnt wanna ruin it.....
You could just ask her how she felt, you don't have to say how you feel
Reply 5
I think it's likely that she didn't mention having a bf because she sees you as a good friend and doesn't figure that you'd be coming on to her - hence, no need to alert you to the fact that she's taken.

That's the likely possibility the way I see it. But it's also possible that she might be doing it on purpose just so you wouldn't stop giving her attention - if it's apparent that you've been giving her a lot of attention lately. Possible.

Either way, if you're really that interested in her, I'd say just go ahead and ask her. Better you get a definite answer rather than being led on.

Unless of course, you really don't want to risk your friendship by doing that. Though quite frankly, you've already risked the friendship by falling in love with her in the first place, lol.

I've been in a similar situation before, so I know how messy a situation this can be. Good luck!:smile:
Reply 6
Just try and forget about trying to pull-her for the moment and think about your working environment.

Feel-free to slate the following approach - but I think it's worth a try. Instead of forgetting about 'pulling-her' - subtly tease her. Drop little hints about her fancying you and then 'laugh-it-off' - try and keep her guessing; and if anything manifests she'll let you know she's interested. Keep her on her toes and keep her second-guessing. If anything is there I think you'll know.

In my experience, blokes tend to be polar: either not interested or confessing their undying love (of course an over-generalisation - but pretty-common).

Hope it helps; if anybody thinks I'm full-of-it please feel-free to have your say.

Good-luck dude
Reply 7
She's loves the attention. She knows the attention would diminish if she told you.

That's my reading at least.
Reply 8
she might think that by mentioning she has a boyfriend you would think that she thought you were coming on to her and therefore bigheaded if that makes sense?

i hate telling people i have a boyfriend, not cos i want attention just cos it sort of feel like id be showing off! I'm perfectly happy to talk about him if someone asks me if i have a boyfriend.
Lol I think you're hitting on my g/f mate. I won't say her name on here, but she's about 5'6". brunette, reasonably attractive, quite curvy and has the personality you describe and works where you describe. Back off man!! :biggrin:
Maybe she is just a friendly person.
Reply 11
TopSortedMadForIt
Lol I think you're hitting on my g/f mate. I won't say her name on here, but she's about 5'6". brunette, reasonably attractive, quite curvy and has the personality you describe and works where you describe. Back off man!! :biggrin:


lol you cant be serious? :P if you are..howd you guess...?
Reply 12
lol..its not ur girl. for a start she isnt brunette!
lol..its not ur girl. for a start she isnt brunette!


And that could have been quite interesting *sighs*
Are you going to talk to her?
Reply 14
I just feel like we're so right for each other. Although if I tell her I dont want to make work awkward and lose my friendship with her.
I just feel like we're so right for each other. Although if I tell her I dont want to make work awkward and lose my friendship with her.


Been there kind of. Well you don't tell her that, definitely not yet
Why not just ask her why she didn't tell you she had a boyfriend and see what she says?
That way if it was just friendliness you can say "oh just curious" etc
Reply 16
I've now been told that she's broken up from her v long term bf. Any link between my arrival and their break-up? what should i do now?
Ask her if she has a boyfriend? Find out for sure. No point hearing it through the "grapevine".
I've now been told that she's broken up from her v long term bf. Any link between my arrival and their break-up? what should i do now?


Talk to her about the break up as a friend and see what happened. She's probably feeling bad so just be there for her, you need to leave you and her for a while so she can recover
Reply 19
tell her how you feel but say that your fine with being friends.

sorry if thats crumby advice