English Lit. Essay Grading...?

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    My English Essay, hasn't been marked. Can somebody tell me what done wrong etc? Structure is one way Ted Hughes coveys the feelings of the soldier in Bayonet Charge, for example, the poet starts the poem immediately in the action, whereby showing how he ‘suddenly awoke’ and how he was ‘running’ in the midst of World War One, allows the reader to see the soldier’s patriotism where he wasn’t initially hesitant when given the official orders to charge, yet this is contradicted in the second and third stanza, as the pace slows right down and the poet starts to emphasise on this shift in the soldier’s focus; as the soldier begins to doubt why he is actually doing this? Why was he fighting for the King and his country, whilst he just sits in a protected palace – whilst he is on the frontlines battling for his life? A further point, in regards to the structure used to convey the soldier’s feelings, is that of the three stanzas that make up Bayonet Charge, the first and third, which are full of intensiveness and action, consist of 8 lines, the second, is divergent in that it only contains 7 lines. This emphasises on the fact that during stanza two, the soldier does have doubts as to his role in the conflict.

    One use of language to convey the feeling of ‘bewilderment’ is how the each stanza has a different voice and mood, for instance the first stanza shows how the soldier had ‘awoke’ and was ‘running-raw.’ The word ‘raw’ means exposed and potentially deadly, for instance, red raw, which could be making reference to the fact that the soldier the poem is focused on, could be unfit for proper usage. Later on, in the second stanza, it is evident that the soldier starts to hesitate and his judgement is lacking, as shown in ‘almost stopped.’ Furthermore, the alliterative phrase, ‘cold clockwork’ alludes to the key theme of inquisition throughout the poem. In addition, clocks can only go one way, this could imply that the soldier has regrets which further adds to the idea that the soldier had doubts. These regrets could be joining the army, though it was compulsory from 1916 – two years into the Great War.

    Another mood featured in a different stanza, is the third stanza, where it is known to the reader that the solider has ‘plunged past’ the green hedge in which he was running ‘towards’ in the first stanza. This shift in focus demonstrates the soldiers change in goal, from protecting the unit, to protecting himself. This is comparative from the second stanza because it proves that after his hesitant and frozen phase where the soldier was questioning why he was actually in this conflict.
    An additional way that Ted Hughes uses language is through his use of personification, by referring to the war as a ‘threshing circle’ with its ‘mouth wide Open’ which portrays how the soldier believes that the war is a person readying to eat him, that in theory means that the soldier does genuinely feel like he is going to die. Moreover the poet’s use of enjambment at the end of the line and by carrying it on the second line, emphasises on how the soldier had a pause in realisation and allows the reader to interpret the sentence with contrast to the rest of the poem.

    I cut out the Intro and Conclusion.
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