Hi
About a year and 3 months ago I moved back to my University city and started renting a small flat with one of my best friends from Uni. It started off fun, but for me he has since become a pain in the hole, does nothing to contribute to the maintenance of the flat aside from the rent and bill money and I'm struggling to see what I am getting out of our living situation other than an unnecessary financial deficit, inconvenience and wasted effort . I don't know if I'm just over-reacting or not, or how to address the situation without making a bigger problem.
These are the issues I have:
1) He is messy and does not clean. In 15 months he has done every cleaning task once, whilst I have done it every other week. This includes hoovering, cleaning the kitchen, kitchen appliances and the bathroom, taking out the bins etc. I'll spend 2 hours a week cleaning everything and getting everything tidy and then he will come in, spill something and refuse to clean it up, or will drop large crumbs all over the carpet and refuse to pick them up, saying "just hoover it again next week". Then in massive hypocrisy he will have a go at me if I leave an unwashed plate or cup by the sink for more than an hour.
2) He won't contribute towards purchasing things that we both use, cleaning things, toilet paper, soap etc. He just waits for me to buy it and goes for a poo at work.
3) Subset of Point 1 - I can never use the oven because of some kind of mess he has made in it. I don't eat meat and yet he does not wash any of the trays or grills in the oven after use, leaving them covered in pork fat so I can't use them regardless. He also leaves pasta in a dish at the bottom of the oven instead of putting it in the fridge, using up another oven pan.
4) Every problem that has happened with the flat I have had to sort out with the estate agents or tradesmen as he refuses. He never goes out to top up the gas or electric and always makes a massive deal of it if he's had to go out. He makes a massive fuss if I leave my laptop on for 10 mins whilst i pop to the spar and he goes into my room and turns it off saying its wasting electricity, despite the fact that most days he has a laptop, tv, games console and electric guitar running continuously for hours.
5) He never offers to give me petrol money when I am continuously giving him lifts to places, usually when he is late. I have started charging him now, but he either doesn't pay, delays paying or tries to swap the payment for something inferior.
6) I sorted out the entire flat-moving process, flat viewing, estate agents, the upfront reserving cash, drove 150 miles in 2 days and slept in the car to get everything sorted, then when we moved in he immediately took the bigger room without saying anything whilst I was moving things. I didn't object as we were only meant to move in for 6 months, then he refused to get a job for a year and sat about playing games so we'll have been here for 18 months. The bigger room contains the boiler and he controls when the water or heating is on. I work evenings and often come in cold and wet at 11.15pm but he refuses to keep the boiler on until 11.25 because he goes to bed at 11 and then I can't put it on until he gets up in the morning.
7) The only thing he has done for me since we moved in is clean once and the other day he put me on his Cosco card contract for £30, but he owed me that anyway and I will have to drive us to Cosco if he wants to go anyway.
Regardless I'm getting sick of living in this situation and I don't know if I'm over-reacting or being walked over and I don't know how to address it successfully. Advice appreciated.