No friends. lonely ect. please reply. Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 11 years ago
#1
I've come to the realization that I have no real friends. Sure, I have a fair few acquaintances who invite me to parties and the like; but on a day to day basis I have nothing to do, no one to hang out with. I think that if i rang any of my semi-friends from college, I'd feel out of place in their friendship groups, or cliques. I don't think theres anything wrong with me personally. I used to have lots of people who I could call friends in secondary school but since then I've lost touch with everyone and, again, would feel out of place hanging out with their new friends.

All this has made me pretty lonely (not to mention bored) over the summer. What should I do?

--thanks in advance
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Jsk
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#2
Report 11 years ago
#2
I wouldnt worry about it. I feel quite similar. I have just left secondary school and two of my best mates have moved away. One has gone to spain and the other about 50 miles away. I tend to call those who i have always been in contact with. My other 3 best friends are all going to other colleges but we are doing our best to keep in touch.

As for friends that you have lost touch with give them a call or text or email. When i lesft primary school i left my best friend as we then went to different schools. After about 2 and half years, i had had enough of not being in contact with her so i called her home phone and since then have been best of friends again. It cant hurt to get back intouch with old friends nor to make new ones and i would just say hang out with those "aquatences" of yours. You never know... they might end up your best frien
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aliclare
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#3
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I feel similar. I do have friends, but my best friend has a new boyfriend and is wrapped up in her relationship and doesn't seem to have time just to go out anymore.
Other friends are there for me but aren't as close, but I have been making an extra effort to ring them and go on a night out and it's made it better.
Try meeting up with your acquaintances and semi-friends as you may become closer and you may find that you fit in fine with their friendship groups, it's worth a try. Hope you feel better x
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00-0830-NADINE
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#4
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try going out and meeting new people, even through some of your aquaintances, you havent got anything to do, you might have some fun, and if you dont you will have been just as bored at home right?
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RosiePosiePuddingAndPie
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#5
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#5
You might feel a little out of place with the aquaintance's friendship groups at first, but after a little while you could be a part of the group too! Friendship groups are always changing, and there's no rules to say that they can't have new people in the group!! Even if you don't become tight mates, at least you'll be a little closer, and you won't be bored
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linkin1988
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#6
Report 11 years ago
#6
I know 1 or 2 people who are the same. Or say the same.
I dont mean to sound mean, but you wont make any friends if you dont go out, and you probably wont go out without any friends. Hard huh? But if you dont make the effort to go out of your house, then you stand no chance.
My friend complains he has no girlfriend, that hes bored, i tell him that its because you dont go out of your house anymore to even consider meeting anyone... then he just shrugs me off and continues with doing the same thing he does every day.

Use your "acquaintances" to meet new people, or build on friendships.You yourself have to make the effort!
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transit
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#7
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Are you about to go to uni? If that's the case, you'll have literally thousands of opportunities to make friends.

If you're already at uni - the same applies - get involved in a few clubs, societies, you should meet plenty of people. Same applies if you're not at uni - playing sport etc is a great way of making friends. I can understand your apprehensions, and no doubt you'll be wondering how you can meet new people and make friends when people already have established friend groups. The reality is that there's plenty of people like you, and friendship groups chop and change all the time, and are often willing to take on a few new members! It's making the decision to go out there that's the hardest; take the first step and you're well on your way.

Best of luck!
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mayan
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#8
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(Original post by linkin1988)
I know 1 or 2 people who are the same. Or say the same.
I dont mean to sound mean, but you wont make any friends if you dont go out, and you probably wont go out without any friends. Hard huh? But if you dont make the effort to go out of your house, then you stand no chance.
My friend complains he has no girlfriend, that hes bored, i tell him that its because you dont go out of your house anymore to even consider meeting anyone... then he just shrugs me off and continues with doing the same thing he does every day.

Use your "acquaintances" to meet new people, or build on friendships.You yourself have to make the effort!
Obviously for you just going out and meeting people will be quite a hurdle because it sounds like your not used to it. Try joining some clubs or meetings for people with similar interests. Just say hey and have mundane conversation with people even if you don't want to, once they see your a friendly person you should form some friendships pretty easily.

If your feeling more adventurous go out with some of your half friends to a bar or something and just talk to anyone, Just ask where they got an item of their clothing or whatever it'll start a conversation. That'll be good practice and soon enough you'll naturally become more confident with meeting more people. Once you build on your social skills believe it or not more people will actually WANT to be your friend because your fun to be around.

Post above hit the nail on the head, you have to be proactive and do something about it otherwise nothing will change.
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blackfish
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#9
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i know that feeling all to well mate, I have that myself, the difference is that i have "friends" but they ain't really friends... They take advantage of my knowledge of computers and ue me as a listening ear etc but do i get anything in return B******S do I :mad:

Just try and go out somewhere if you can you might meet some people in a park or on a bus etc (yes i am generalising meeting places bigtime)

HTH
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Damask Ellion
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#10
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Hey if you are lonely get some cats or listen to 'all by myself' by Eric Carmen
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Geerththanan
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#11
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#11
Join a club/society of your interest, where you could meet people with similar interests...

Getting a job would be a good way to meet new people...whether its voltunary work or paid work...

Go on some tour/expedition....another way of meeting people...and possibly people from across the world...whom you might end up to be good friends with...I know a lot of people who go travelling on their own..and end up making good friends...

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AT82
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#12
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Make friends, the problem is you need friends to make friends, they don't go on trees.

You basically need to go out there more in order to this, it is a lot easier than it may seem. I never used to have many friends but these days I am always out with mates or my gf.
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horrorboy
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#13
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(Original post by AT82)
Make friends, the problem is you need friends to make friends, they don't go on trees.

You basically need to go out there more in order to this, it is a lot easier than it may seem. I never used to have many friends but these days I am always out with mates or my gf.
Ha, actually I remember you posting quite a few threads like this and that you were a 20 odd year old virgin etc, sorry. So how did you manage to get a gf, whats the secret. I still don't have one
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scribble_girl
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#14
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(Original post by Damask Ellion)
Hey if you are lonely get some cats or listen to 'all by myself' by Eric Carmen

I'm sure it's against the rules to advocate suicide.... :p:
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Anonymous #2
#15
Report 11 years ago
#15
I'm in exactly the same situation, except I don't even have acquaintances who invite me out anywhere - this is purely because I refused to be like other people in my sixth form and ***** (I dunno if I'm allowed to say that in this context...?) about practically everyone else in my year... so I'm feeling pretty s*** at the moment as the summer is passing by and I can't 'go out and meet people' because i have no-one go 'go out and meet people' with...
just waiting for uni now to actually meet some genuine people, and hopefully I'll actually find some... fed up of things being like this

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Scott20
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#16
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(Original post by blackfish)
i know that feeling all to well mate, I have that myself, the difference is that i have "friends" but they ain't really friends... They take advantage of my knowledge of computers and ue me as a listening ear etc but do i get anything in return B******S do I :mad:

Just try and go out somewhere if you can you might meet some people in a park or on a bus etc (yes i am generalising meeting places bigtime)

HTH
wot planet are you on, you dont go on a bus and meet new people and then start hanging around with them on a daily basis, ever seen a blue moon? :rolleyes:
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JC.
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#17
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Can relate to this.

The only person ive got in the world is my fiance. She's stuck in the states with her father till christmas as he's terminally ill.
Im not bothered though. You only need one good friend.
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Scott20
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#18
Report 11 years ago
#18
so you shouldn't be JC, as long as your happy.
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**mentalheroin**
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#19
Report 11 years ago
#19
OP. I'm in the same situation as you. I'm goin in a completely different direction to people i use to hang around with 2 years ago. I just turned down a BBQ invite cos i dont wanna breathe in marijuana fumes and take part in immature conversations. So here i am, on TSR. YAY!:rolleyes:
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Rutter knows best!
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#20
Report 11 years ago
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(Original post by PHKnows)
OP. I'm in the same situation as you. I'm goin in a completely different direction to people i use to hang around with 2 years ago. I just turned down a BBQ invite cos i dont wanna breathe in marijuana fumes and take part in immature conversations. So here i am, on TSR. YAY!:rolleyes:
http://i2.turboimagehost.com/t/35018...f7d34279cc.jpg
power to you.
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