University flatmates - First year

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    Hi,
    So I just moved into my new university accommodation on tuesday, and I'm going to go and start living there Thursday (tomorrow). I met some of my flatmates while I was there and they seemed very nice. The thing is, I'm really really neevous that I'm not going to be able to make friends with them. I never had any friends during school, and I've always strugfled to make them so I'm really anxious to get things right this time. They all seem really close already (I have moved in late due to last minutes swap arounds with my accommodation) and I'mjust worried i wont be able to fit in. I suppose you could say I'm a bit socially awkward, but from what I've been told by family, my awkwardness tends to come across as me being a bit aloof, which i really dont intend at all. So, i guess the question is, does anyone have any advice? I'd really really like to make friends with them, so any tips would be appreciated.
    Thanks
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    it's easier said then done, but don't stress... the more you worry about it the more unnatural your behaviour will be, the more you will be caught up in yourself and seem aloof and the more you will second guess yourself

    take the bull by the horns so to speak and as soon as you're moved in go and knock on a couple of doors and say you've moved in and ask if anyone's doing anything tonight... if you act interested in them and that is people's first perception of you then a bit of shyness later won't counter that... if you sit quietly in the kitchen waiting for someone to invite you to something and then act shy when they talk to you they may get a different impression

    if people say nothing is planned then perhaps (depending on your preference) say you'd love to hang out tonight since it's your first night and suggest you get pizza/have beer/watch a film/go to a club

    also free stuff never goes down badly - vodka, beer, sweets, cakes etc
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    (Original post by daviem)
    Hi,
    So I just moved into my new university accommodation on tuesday, and I'm going to go and start living there Thursday (tomorrow). I met some of my flatmates while I was there and they seemed very nice. The thing is, I'm really really neevous that I'm not going to be able to make friends with them. I never had any friends during school, and I've always strugfled to make them so I'm really anxious to get things right this time. They all seem really close already (I have moved in late due to last minutes swap arounds with my accommodation) and I'mjust worried i wont be able to fit in. I suppose you could say I'm a bit socially awkward, but from what I've been told by family, my awkwardness tends to come across as me being a bit aloof, which i really dont intend at all. So, i guess the question is, does anyone have any advice? I'd really really like to make friends with them, so any tips would be appreciated.
    Thanks
    You have a clean slate, they dont know you.
    Be open minded
    Have a house meeting or someone may already have made themself house leader.
    Do things together or suggest that o to pub, cook together, dvds, cinema, socials at uni etc. If they offer go along. Talk to people.
    If you introduce yourself, then you cna mention you are a bit nervous in meeting them, but are looking forward to making friends. tel them if you seem aloof thats not what you are and its just nerves.

    If you make an effort then you maximise your chances of fitting in.
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    (Original post by doodle_333)
    it's easier said then done, but don't stress... the more you worry about it the more unnatural your behaviour will be, the more you will be caught up in yourself and seem aloof and the more you will second guess yourself

    take the bull by the horns so to speak and as soon as you're moved in go and knock on a couple of doors and say you've moved in and ask if anyone's doing anything tonight... if you act interested in them and that is people's first perception of you then a bit of shyness later won't counter that... if you sit quietly in the kitchen waiting for someone to invite you to something and then act shy when they talk to you they may get a different impression

    if people say nothing is planned then perhaps (depending on your preference) say you'd love to hang out tonight since it's your first night and suggest you get pizza/have beer/watch a film/go to a club

    also free stuff never goes down badly - vodka, beer, sweets, cakes etc
    Hi, thanks for replying, i have to say i had intended to let other people make the first move but know you've mentioned it, that does seem a bit stupid. Being proactive makes a lot of sense.
    Thanks a lot, i ho estly appreciate you takjng tge tine to respond
 
 
 
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