Girlfriend has gone to uni - need advice

Announcements
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Me and my girlfriend have been going out nearly a year. Met in college and were head over heels for one another. Basically seen each other every day for nearly a year. We have an argument every now and then each month and when she's in that mood she says how she thinks we won't last in uni and how I'm boring (she apologies an hour later and says how she thinks we will and how she loves me). She then jokes around sometimes and says how she's going on the pull. I have mollicoddled her a lot really.
    She's never been clubbing and is going clubbing real soon, she's doesn't really drink either. Even though I know she won't flirt with anybody, I just keep having thoughts and images in my head that she'll meet someone new and leave me, like I'm imagingig lads coming up to her and trying to flirt with her when she's at the on campus bar or when she eventually goes clubbing. Them thoughts are making me dead nauseous as if I could be sick. I miss her and she says that she misses me too. She's not really the big affectionate type either might I add.
    I don't want to lose her, honest without her I'd be in a bad state. The fact she's moved away all be it she's only an hours bus drive away has killed me. Obviously because she's socialising with all her flat mates and hall mate she she's not speaking to me as much as usual. She's been to the on campus bar 2 nights and I've spoken to her here and there when she's been there. I'm jealous of all these new people she's meeting because they are with her. I know it will be hard the whole uni thing but I want to try and do my best with it. I know I'm clingy and need to stop that as much if I want it to work.
    We've facetimed and called each other numerous times everyday she's been away.
    Even when she is staying out at the on campus bar and coming back at 1am and We're not facetiming till about 1:30am till about 2:30am. When we're face timing late on as well she can be dead sweet and cute towards me.
    Before she left for uni me and her spent basically over 2 weeks staying together and she's said to me a couple of weeks back "no matter what don't let me lose you" and on the day she went uni she said "this doesn't change anything for us you know, me coming here"

    Just want some advice or some opinions on what I've said. If anybody is in a similar situation or have been, or if you just have an opinion or advice on me. Anything will help
    Offline

    3
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Me and my girlfriend have been going out nearly a year. Met in college and were head over heels for one another. Basically seen each other every day for nearly a year. We have an argument every now and then each month and when she's in that mood she says how she thinks we won't last in uni and how I'm boring (she apologies an hour later and says how she thinks we will and how she loves me). She then jokes around sometimes and says how she's going on the pull. I have mollicoddled her a lot really.
    She's never been clubbing and is going clubbing real soon, she's doesn't really drink either. Even though I know she won't flirt with anybody, I just keep having thoughts and images in my head that she'll meet someone new and leave me, like I'm imagingig lads coming up to her and trying to flirt with her when she's at the on campus bar or when she eventually goes clubbing. Them thoughts are making me dead nauseous as if I could be sick. I miss her and she says that she misses me too. She's not really the big affectionate type either might I add.
    I don't want to lose her, honest without her I'd be in a bad state. The fact she's moved away all be it she's only an hours bus drive away has killed me. Obviously because she's socialising with all her flat mates and hall mate she she's not speaking to me as much as usual. She's been to the on campus bar 2 nights and I've spoken to her here and there when she's been there. I'm jealous of all these new people she's meeting because they are with her. I know it will be hard the whole uni thing but I want to try and do my best with it. I know I'm clingy and need to stop that as much if I want it to work.
    We've facetimed and called each other numerous times everyday she's been away.
    Even when she is staying out at the on campus bar and coming back at 1am and We're not facetiming till about 1:30am till about 2:30am. When we're face timing late on as well she can be dead sweet and cute towards me.
    Before she left for uni me and her spent basically over 2 weeks staying together and she's said to me a couple of weeks back "no matter what don't let me lose you" and on the day she went uni she said "this doesn't change anything for us you know, me coming here"

    Just want some advice or some opinions on what I've said. If anybody is in a similar situation or have been, or if you just have an opinion or advice on me. Anything will help
    As long as you are not clingy and let her enjoy the uni life then you will be fine, at the same time as long as you speak to each other every so often, communication is always massive in a relatonship.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    when she's in that mood she says how she thinks we won't last in uni and how I'm boring (she apologies an hour later and says how she thinks we will and how she loves me).

    She then jokes around sometimes and says how she's going on the pull. I have mollicoddled her a lot really.

    She's never been clubbing and is going clubbing real soon,

    I know I'm clingy and need to stop that as much if I want it to work.


    Even when she is staying out at the on campus bar and coming back at 1am and We're not facetiming till about 1:30am till about 2:30am.

    Before she left for uni me and her spent basically over 2 weeks staying together and she's said to me a couple of weeks back "no matter what don't let me lose you"


    the things i have quoted are reasons i don't think it will work. firstly i only know one person who is still in a relationship that they started before uni (and everyone has now graduated)... which is why i don't recommend them from the start. on top of that the things that i picked out make it even more likely you won't last.
    obviously this is my opinion and you should believe what you want but you did ask a question so i will tell you what i think.

    i'm not saying break up with her, i'm just saying be realistic.

    the phoning at 1 or 2am is not how a relationship works. you're waiting up till the early hours to speak to her sacrificing your sleep, why? you want to do that for the rest of the year? because people don't really calm down that much in their first year...

    the last point i highlighted makes it sound like she knows you're gonna end up breaking up.

    also she doesn't treat you with respect the first two things i quoted show this. you don't say that to a person you love.

    uni changes a person and they grow apart from people they leave back at home.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Its over
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    if you have to ask then you probably already know.
 
 
 
Write a reply… Reply
Submit reply

Register

Thanks for posting! You just need to create an account in order to submit the post
  1. this can't be left blank
    that username has been taken, please choose another Forgotten your password?
  2. this can't be left blank
    this email is already registered. Forgotten your password?
  3. this can't be left blank

    6 characters or longer with both numbers and letters is safer

  4. this can't be left empty
    your full birthday is required
  1. Oops, you need to agree to our Ts&Cs to register
  2. Slide to join now Processing…

Updated: September 28, 2016
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Poll
Do you think sex education should be compulsory in schools?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Quick reply
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.