I feel terrible...

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    Hi everyone, so here's a shortened version of my issue.
    I got into a relationship with a close friend I met at uni a few weeks ago, however, I don't really want to be with him. He's an amazing guy, but I just don't feel ready for a relationship right now. I feel like it's too early to end it, but I don't want to prolong something that won't work. I feel like a horrible person, what should I do?

    Also, I should add. We (along with some other friends) were planning to live together in our second year. I don't want to ruin the chance of having that purely because I can't deal with my own feelings.
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    (Original post by Effie14)
    Hi everyone, so here's a shortened version of my issue.
    I got into a relationship with a close friend I met at uni a few weeks ago, however, I don't really want to be with him. He's an amazing guy, but I just don't feel ready for a relationship right now. I feel like it's too early to end it, but I don't want to prolong something that won't work. I feel like a horrible person, what should I do?

    Also, I should add. We (along with some other friends) were planning to live together in our second year. I don't want to ruin the chance of having that purely because I can't deal with my own feelings.
    If I'm not misunderstanding, it is not too late to rethink who you are living with, unless you've signed a contract...

    If you don't feel ready and being in a relationship makes you feel uneasy, just explain that to him.
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    (Original post by SeanFM)
    If I'm not misunderstanding, it is not too late to rethink who you are living with, unless you've signed a contract...

    If you don't feel ready and being in a relationship makes you feel uneasy, just explain that to him.
    That's true, but (selfishly albeit) I don't want to be excluded from the group as they are my closest friends by far. I know this is selfish of me, but I really enjoy being around them, and we all get on well.

    I also worry about his feelings. He really seems to like me when I just can't deal with the whole thing. I'm his first girlfriend, and I don't want to ruin the concept of dating for him because of my emotional issues.
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    (Original post by Effie14)
    Hi everyone, so here's a shortened version of my issue.
    I got into a relationship with a close friend I met at uni a few weeks ago, however, I don't really want to be with him. He's an amazing guy, but I just don't feel ready for a relationship right now. I feel like it's too early to end it, but I don't want to prolong something that won't work. I feel like a horrible person, what should I do?

    Also, I should add. We (along with some other friends) were planning to live together in our second year. I don't want to ruin the chance of having that purely because I can't deal with my own feelings.
    Just talk to him sooner rather than later.

    Be honest and tell him you like him, but you dont feel ready for a relationship and wnated to tell him now as soon as you realised. You cna do the classic its not you its me talk. End it and you are done.

    Tell him you hope this doesnt end things as you being friends.. Bit early to be planning who you will be moving out with in second year imo.
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    (Original post by Effie14)
    That's true, but (selfishly albeit) I don't want to be excluded from the group as they are my closest friends by far. I know this is selfish of me, but I really enjoy being around them, and we all get on well.

    I also worry about his feelings. He really seems to like me when I just can't deal with the whole thing. I'm his first girlfriend, and I don't want to ruin the concept of dating for him because of my emotional issues.
    Very noble of you but at the same time you can't suffer and be something that you don't want to be. The longer you let it go on as well, the worse it might get in terms of a fall out.

    :dontknow: maybe you can try to keep it an amicable break up as possible to stay in the group..
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    (Original post by SeanFM)
    Very noble of you but at the same time you can't suffer and be something that you don't want to be. The longer you let it go on as well, the worse it might get in terms of a fall out.

    :dontknow: maybe you can try to keep it an amicable break up as possible to stay in the group..
    Thanks, I'll try to just say how I feel in a kind and honest way. If he dislikes me afterwards, I'm fine with it I guess. I just feel bad for hurting him.

    Thanks to both of you for your kind support, you've helped a lot! And you guys are right, I might not even move in with them.

    Thanks again!
 
 
 
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