Do I go out with a bang or just leave it be?

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    Very very long story short I've liked this girl for just under a year and I thought she was the one. I've never thought about anyone like I did with her, the excitement I got from talking to her and seeing her was nothing like I've felt before.

    I told her that I liked her and she said she was interested in someone else, my feelings for her were so strong that this bothered me and I could not stop thinking about it. I still talked to her everyday after that and then she slept with some guy on holiday, this was an even bigger blow. I confronted her about it as we built a good friendship and she said she still spoke to him and she was still speaking to the guy she was interested in. This annoyed me so much that I had a go at her basically slut shamming her.

    I then apologised and have been trying to make things right since but I can't stop thinking about what I said. I told her that I never meant what I said but the more I think about it the more I think what I said is true. I trusted her so much with what I told her and she ends up telling someone that we worked with about what I said and I felt betrayed.

    Should I confront her about sharing our conversation with other people and tell her I think what I said is true? or should I just leave it and let her think that I think good things about her still?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Very very long story short I've liked this girl for just under a year and I thought she was the one. I've never thought about anyone like I did with her, the excitement I got from talking to her and seeing her was nothing like I've felt before.

    I told her that I liked her and she said she was interested in someone else, my feelings for her were so strong that this bothered me and I could not stop thinking about it. I still talked to her everyday after that and then she slept with some guy on holiday, this was an even bigger blow. I confronted her about it as we built a good friendship and she said she still spoke to him and she was still speaking to the guy she was interested in. This annoyed me so much that I had a go at her basically slut shamming her.

    I then apologised and have been trying to make things right since but I can't stop thinking about what I said. I told her that I never meant what I said but the more I think about it the more I think what I said is true. I trusted her so much with what I told her and she ends up telling someone that we worked with about what I said and I felt betrayed.

    Should I confront her about sharing our conversation with other people and tell her I think what I said is true? or should I just leave it and let her think that I think good things about her still?
    Marriage is a con they get half your life savings trust me love is a scam
    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by SteveDogg23)
    Marriage is a con they get half your life savings trust me love is a scam
    Love is only a scam if you don't actually care about that person
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Very very long story short I've liked this girl for just under a year and I thought she was the one. I've never thought about anyone like I did with her, the excitement I got from talking to her and seeing her was nothing like I've felt before.

    I told her that I liked her and she said she was interested in someone else, my feelings for her were so strong that this bothered me and I could not stop thinking about it. I still talked to her everyday after that and then she slept with some guy on holiday, this was an even bigger blow. I confronted her about it as we built a good friendship and she said she still spoke to him and she was still speaking to the guy she was interested in. This annoyed me so much that I had a go at her basically slut shamming her.

    I then apologised and have been trying to make things right since but I can't stop thinking about what I said. I told her that I never meant what I said but the more I think about it the more I think what I said is true. I trusted her so much with what I told her and she ends up telling someone that we worked with about what I said and I felt betrayed.

    Should I confront her about sharing our conversation with other people and tell her I think what I said is true? or should I just leave it and let her think that I think good things about her still?
    You should never have called her a slut and can you blame her for seeking someone elses opinion if someone said that to me i would ask if someone else thought it true, was it a secret what you told her did you ask her not to share this with anyone?
    So what if she slept with a guy on holiday she is not with you and you are angry because she rejected you its a good thing she ain't with you as you sound like a douche.
    Leave it be and don't stoop any lower by saying its true what you said if you cared about her you would show some respect instead of humiliating her.
    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by chikane)
    You should never have called her a slut and can you blame her for seeking someone elses opinion if someone said that to me i would ask if someone else thought it true, was it a secret what you told her did you ask her not to share this with anyone?
    So what if she slept with a guy on holiday she is not with you and you are angry because she rejected you its a good thing she ain't with you as you sound like a douche.
    Leave it be and don't stoop any lower by saying its true what you said if you cared about her you would show some respect instead of humiliating her.
    It was not a secret but previously I have asked her if she has shared what I have told her with anyone else and she said something like "no, I would never tell anyone else what you tell me".
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    This annoyed me so much that I had a go at her basically slut shamming her.

    Should I confront her about sharing our conversation with other people and tell her I think what I said is true? or should I just leave it and let her think that I think good things about her still?
    Hate to break it to you , but this was just infatuation.

    She wasnt interested in you in that way never was and never likely to be, she told you so.

    She will never forget the slut shaming or what you said. Sorry is a bit late. It shows you have a temper and say things when upset. Unsurpisingly people do not gind this an attractive trait.

    As for you, then take on board she isnt interested plys she isnt to be trusted as she felt it was ok to share private conversations.

    You should just walk awat with some dignity. No point oing for the second slut shame that just confirms her views about you and she will share that. No real point trying to compliment her either as she still inst going to date you. Just leave it be imo, but up to you.

    You should work on keeping the temper under control and getting over attached/ angry with girls becayse thats going to lead you into trouble in future.
    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Hate to break it to you , but this was just infatuation.

    She wasnt interested in you in that way never was and never likely to be, she told you so.

    She will never forget the slut shaming or what you said. Sorry is a bit late. It shows you have a temper and say things when upset. Unsurpisingly people do not gind this an attractive trait.

    As for you, then take on board she isnt interested plys she isnt to be trusted as she felt it was ok to share private conversations.

    You should just walk awat with some dignity. No point oing for the second slut shame that just confirms her views about you and she will share that. No real point trying to compliment her either as she still inst going to date you. Just leave it be imo, but up to you.

    You should work on keeping the temper under control and getting over attached/ angry with girls becayse thats going to lead you into trouble in future.
    Should I ask why she told him what I said? I feel betrayed that she talked about our conversation to someone else. Like this can ruin my relationship with other people that I work with if they find out what I said/did.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Should I ask why she told him what I said? I feel betrayed that she talked about our conversation to someone else. Like this can ruin my relationship with other people that I work with if they find out what I said/did.
    You can ask if you want but when you confront people about something wrong they have done, then they very rarely tell you the truth. She may come out with something silly like she doesnt know. I wouldnt bother.


    The most I would do if I spoke to her at all is just to say youd found out about it and you are very disappointed she broke something you told her in confidence and that it will now crate a lot of trouble for you. Leave it at that no anger.
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    (Original post by SteveDogg23)
    Marriage is a con they get half your life savings trust me love is a scam
    haha, damn, who hurt you
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    CLASSIC
    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by StfuPls)
    CLASSIC
    classic what?
    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    You can ask if you want but when you confront people about something wrong they have done, then they very rarely tell you the truth. She may come out with something silly like she doesnt know. I wouldnt bother.


    The most I would do if I spoke to her at all is just to say youd found out about it and you are very disappointed she broke something you told her in confidence and that it will now crate a lot of trouble for you. Leave it at that no anger.
    I confronted her about it and she did not answer straight away she kept asking, what did he say and then why was it even brought up and all she said in the end was "I wasn't planning on telling someone, didn't think he would talk to you about it".

    She then said that she was coming in to speak to me about it but I wasn't working, I replied saying if you still want to talk i'll talk to you about it. She hasn't replied to that yet and don't know if she will. I don't wont her to come in randomly to work and put me on the spot and talk about it. Should I ask her for an answer to if she wants to talk or take her not replying as a no to not talking about it?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I confronted her about it and she did not answer straight away she kept asking, what did he say and then why was it even brought up and all she said in the end was "I wasn't planning on telling someone, didn't think he would talk to you about it".

    She then said that she was coming in to speak to me about it but I wasn't working, I replied saying if you still want to talk i'll talk to you about it. She hasn't replied to that yet and don't know if she will. I don't wont her to come in randomly to work and put me on the spot and talk about it. Should I ask her for an answer to if she wants to talk or take her not replying as a no to not talking about it?
    The first bit seems tio me she didnt realise she would be caught out. So it was ok as long as you didnt find out.

    Your choice whetehr you wnat to talk to her about it, but she will have prepared an answer now and you would have to see whether you believed her, whether you wnat to carry on talking and forgive and whether you cna trust her. thats up to you.
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    You need to grow up and stop treating her with cruelty if she fails to conform to your expectations, also she's not a slut just because she had sex with someone other than you.
 
 
 
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