What will you be doing over the Easter break? >>

feeling awfully lonely....especially at work **Pottential trigger*

I have a huge problem.

I did post a similar thread before but sadly got no response or help; since TSR is my only place I can turn to.

Moving foward I work in a call centre; its like jail really bad. I am so lonely its getting to the point that I feel really down and avoid going to work and imagine my death. I can get awfully suicidal one minute, and feel like self harming the next ...but I dont like seeing the scars and I cant wear anything nice esp in the summer ; so I am controlling. But I really feel worthless. Ill move foward instead of self pitying myself because I do it 24/7....anyway theres 3 guys at work in the whole call centre; and they always talk about girls,football , sex etc.

One of the guys was becomming extremely friendly with me but I told my father ; father told me to complain to the manager which I did on his saying and now he doesnt talk to me. Which is fine but I kind of regret it ; but I remember him telling my collegue that "he doesnt like me".

But even if he didnt I shouldnt have listened to my father, whats done is done. And I cant do anything until wait for him to be regular with me. Now ...nobody really talks to me at work I feel lonely ; even if I try to talk its like a whisper to my collegues ears; maybe its because im the youngest in the call centre? I dont know. And maybe its because I dont have the same interests at them.

But there is this really nice girl who sits next to me and is often really friendly, its not like the guys are bad to me they just ask me hi, how are u ...the usual anyway but its nothing furthur like they do wwith the girl that sits next to the other guy. Maybe its because I come across to innocent and so ive been told. They talk about the naughtiest things in the worlds boobs, sex, sex positions , girls , football with the girl...but nobody talks to me.

Apprantly im known as "call centres next top model" but I dont know and is it my looks that my prevent them from speaking to me. One of the guys once told me I had a "nice ass" but I turned really red and said "Okaaaay" and turned my head and carried on wtih my work.
Furthur on , I dont talk because I am in fear my manager will tell me off; if u read my other thread u might know what im talking about today I just shut up and got on with my work and didnt speak at all...the girl who sits next to me asked me if I was ok...I told her im really moody today and I am not feeling well...and the reason behind this was my loneliness.

The call centre people treat me like a child. Im the only teen there! And i come home crying because I feel like im at school again; but this is less worse because I was bullied everyday...now it seems like im being outcasted and rejected at work as well. I feel awfully miserable and rejected.

And I feel its going to be this way all my life.
I just cant be myself ; and if I do my managers tell me off. Its like im pretending to be someone im not; and it hurts my heart so bad, i feel like hurting myself at the moment but im trying to control myself by letting my feelings out here....

please can someone offer kind advice and not be nasty please.Although for some of u this is minor but for me its major because its been like this all my life and nothings changing.

thanks :frown:

Reply 1

Airel

If I were you, I'd quit that Call centre job.

Reply 2

Anonymous.

Thanks Airel, I would have quit that job ages ago....but its hard getting a job these days especially for young people ...im 18btw ...and the money is reallllly reallly good ....I have managed to save loads and I need to save so I can get myself a house next year. So i need the job for moneys sake....and it is killing me. I am a part timer anyway and will be going to uni soon, but again its my loneliness im always rejected every where i go ...and always end up hurt and betrayed.

Reply 3

Fruitcakex

It sounds to me, as if youre trying to do the right thing, and not let the past of school get you down by having this job.
However, i feel like there are some unresolved issues you have, and extreme confidence lows.. i have them, i know how you feel. I think you need to give up your call centre job. Not as a way of giving up and trying, but as a way for you to think and try and sort things out. I really do suggest seeing a counsellor.. i have had two.. i know lol. I think you need to find yourself. Hope that didnt sound like a load of rubbish :smile:

Reply 4

User69701

Firstly I just want to say guys normally talk about football sex and girls. Might have a conversation with a bit more substance but it's doubtful.

Did you ask the "friendly" guy to cut it out before you went to his superior - tbh, if someone did that to me, I don't think I would even go near them.

If you don't actually have any common interests with them, talking with them will be a lot harder. Just what would you actually talk about?

You could always ask the nice girl out sometime. Bond with her outside the workplace and maybe apologise to the guy (if you did go over his head).

PS The guy who said you had a nice bum was trying to be friendly and compliment you. Yeah, men are utterly useless. But these people obviously do not hate you. Just try to make a bit of an effort with them.

Reply 5

Herbie

I'm with Airel - this job is doing nothing for your self esteem or mental health :frown:

If you really can't face quitting, can you at least have a look through the job pages or speak to some of the recruitment agencies? You must have something about you, as you were able to succeed in getting your current job :rolleyes:

.
Believe me - money is great, but you should come first. Your health and happiness are worth so much more.
Please talk to someone - either your friends, or PM me if you have nobody else. Good luck!

Reply 6

Somebody

I know how you feel - I've spent a lot of time trying to be someone I'm not - I don't act myself for fear of being told off! But I am getting better.

Is it going to be your first year at uni? If so, will you know anyone? If not - I would say use it to your advantage - that is what I am planning to do! You get a completely clean slate! Or at least I'm hoping to do that!

But with the call centre, just try to persevere - you only have another month or so left! Talk to the girl next to you - she'll probably try to make sure you're involved in other conversations as well. Some of the reason you feel 'left out' is because you do what I do - go all quiet or pretend you're doing something else when people you don't know too well start talking to you. Perhaps try asking more questions other than the usual ones, and believe in yourself!

OK. Far easier said than done - I should know! But it's a step in the right direction.

Also, do try to talk to someone, since I think this would help you a lot - even if it's just because there's someone there to listen to you!

Hope this helps, and sorry to compare it to me - but it's the only way I could figure writing it in a coherent(ish) way!

Reply 7

username47781

There really is no point staying in a job if you are not happy, i'd rather have less money and be happy.

Reply 8

samba

Rock Fan

There really is no point staying in a job if you are not happy, i'd rather have less money and be happy.

Tell that to the kids in chinese sweatshops!

Reply 9

brockham

I'de stop taking life so seriously... its quite selfish saying you feel suicidal, when your working conditions and life conditions are a zillion times better than a lot of people in the world.
Least it sounds like you have a family that cares as well.

Reply 10

he_is_innocent

brockham

I'de stop taking life so seriously... its quite selfish saying you feel suicidal, when your working conditions and life conditions are a zillion times better than a lot of people in the world.

Very easy for someone to say if they've never felt it themselves or understand it.

Sorry to hear you're feeling like this, I've been in a vaguely similar situation and know it's not easy at all. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk or anything :smile:

Sorry for the lack of actual advice but just wanted to let you know people are thinking of you :smile:

Reply 11

AverageGuyOnTheStreet

OP. My advice would be to quit the job. I was in a similar situation last year but replace job with uni course I hated. But it sounds to me like you really need to get help, because if you are anything like I was then it will take more for you to get better. If you want to talk then feel free to PM me.

Reply 12

Rutter knows best!

if you work in a call centre well what do you expect? your job is to sel people stuff they don't need, exploitig the the people who are easily conned.

quit your job and then i mite give you some help.