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Shall i move on.......
Im posting anon as everytime i post something i get collared so mods please dont remove anon status.
Anyway, i've been seeing a bloke since last Sept, almost a year now and the relationship was just soley intending on being friends - however things just happened to go further than planned and we ended up sleepin together on several occasions. I do like this bloke however, he makes it perfectly clear that we are just friends and iv accepted this.
Back in June i told him that I no longer wanted the friendship to be sexual and that I wanted it to be purely a proper friendship - he accepted this and that was the last time I saw of him.
Tonight, he's been bothering me to come round, stay the night and give him basically pleasure bt not full blown sex HOWEVER, I said no.
Iv also just met another guy last weekend who im beginning to like however were takin things slowly for now.
Now what im really asking for opinions on is should i just totally be honest with this bloke and say im not up for being played/messed around and move on OR stay friends with him as we are very good friends and enjoy each others company????
Anyway, i've been seeing a bloke since last Sept, almost a year now and the relationship was just soley intending on being friends - however things just happened to go further than planned and we ended up sleepin together on several occasions. I do like this bloke however, he makes it perfectly clear that we are just friends and iv accepted this.
Back in June i told him that I no longer wanted the friendship to be sexual and that I wanted it to be purely a proper friendship - he accepted this and that was the last time I saw of him.
Tonight, he's been bothering me to come round, stay the night and give him basically pleasure bt not full blown sex HOWEVER, I said no.
Iv also just met another guy last weekend who im beginning to like however were takin things slowly for now.
Now what im really asking for opinions on is should i just totally be honest with this bloke and say im not up for being played/messed around and move on OR stay friends with him as we are very good friends and enjoy each others company????
Reply 1
Tell this guy to back off and concentrate on this new guy, sounds like the guy harrassing you wants you for one thing only.
Reply 2
Yea - I sent him an honest text saying exactly how I felt and he said no, he's not using me BUT every so often - I get bombarded with messages from him asking me to come round, sleep the night but NO sex - just kiss and cuddles.
You want purely friends
He wants friends with benefits.
Unfortunately, he's taken advantage of your friendship, and I don't think he'll accept just being friends again.
Get to know the new guy in your life a bit more, and hang back from your 'friend' is the best thing to do at the moment.
Hope that helps!
He wants friends with benefits.
Unfortunately, he's taken advantage of your friendship, and I don't think he'll accept just being friends again.
Get to know the new guy in your life a bit more, and hang back from your 'friend' is the best thing to do at the moment.
Hope that helps!
Reply 4
Don't bow to his pressure, this new guy sounds like someone who might treat you with more respect.
Reply 5
Anonymous
Im posting anon as everytime i post something i get collared so mods please dont remove anon status.
Anyway, i've been seeing a bloke since last Sept, almost a year now and the relationship was just soley intending on being friends - however things just happened to go further than planned and we ended up sleepin together on several occasions. I do like this bloke however, he makes it perfectly clear that we are just friends and iv accepted this.
Back in June i told him that I no longer wanted the friendship to be sexual and that I wanted it to be purely a proper friendship - he accepted this and that was the last time I saw of him.
Tonight, he's been bothering me to come round, stay the night and give him basically pleasure bt not full blown sex HOWEVER, I said no.
Iv also just met another guy last weekend who im beginning to like however were takin things slowly for now.
Now what im really asking for opinions on is should i just totally be honest with this bloke and say im not up for being played/messed around and move on OR stay friends with him as we are very good friends and enjoy each others company????
Anyway, i've been seeing a bloke since last Sept, almost a year now and the relationship was just soley intending on being friends - however things just happened to go further than planned and we ended up sleepin together on several occasions. I do like this bloke however, he makes it perfectly clear that we are just friends and iv accepted this.
Back in June i told him that I no longer wanted the friendship to be sexual and that I wanted it to be purely a proper friendship - he accepted this and that was the last time I saw of him.
Tonight, he's been bothering me to come round, stay the night and give him basically pleasure bt not full blown sex HOWEVER, I said no.
Iv also just met another guy last weekend who im beginning to like however were takin things slowly for now.
Now what im really asking for opinions on is should i just totally be honest with this bloke and say im not up for being played/messed around and move on OR stay friends with him as we are very good friends and enjoy each others company????
Surely if you haven't heard from him since you told him you weren't gonna have sex with him anymore, he actually considered you a **** buddy and not really a friend?
The fact that he suddenly texts you asking you to come round and sleep in his bed, kinda affirms the assumption.
Anyway, thats irrelevant. Stick with the new guy.
Reply 6
No, I hear from him - soz didnt explain properly - I hear from him quite often, just havent seen him since June which was the first time this year!!!
See that's the thing - he swears by it we're very good friends - called me his favourite friend tonite (I wonder why - ploy to try and get me round I guess) and that it'll be huggles and kisses but I guess even that would seem totally inappropriate if im sorta seeing someone else. I wonder if i should tell him that i have met someone else - maybe he'll back off then???
See that's the thing - he swears by it we're very good friends - called me his favourite friend tonite (I wonder why - ploy to try and get me round I guess) and that it'll be huggles and kisses but I guess even that would seem totally inappropriate if im sorta seeing someone else. I wonder if i should tell him that i have met someone else - maybe he'll back off then???
I think it'd be a good idea to tell him, though he will probably not be too happy at losing a friend with benefits.
He may contact you loads, but when you actually meet up, does he expect sex and such like?
Either way, you should tell him you're not comfortable with anything more than friendship - especially now that this new guy is on the scene!
He may contact you loads, but when you actually meet up, does he expect sex and such like?
Either way, you should tell him you're not comfortable with anything more than friendship - especially now that this new guy is on the scene!
Reply 8
No he doesnt expect it - it normally just use to happen!!! But then again, because I said no to coming round tonight on MSN, he started texting me quite crude messages which kinda illustrated to me that he was after sexual things - not sex as I had no to it all back in June.
Its all very hurtful to be kinda lead up the garden path at being ''a fav friend'' when in fact, im nothing but a girl with benefits and not a care or thought in the world - BUT hey i have learnt fromy my mistakes.
Its all very hurtful to be kinda lead up the garden path at being ''a fav friend'' when in fact, im nothing but a girl with benefits and not a care or thought in the world - BUT hey i have learnt fromy my mistakes.
Reply 9
Dont give in, he obviously isnt a very good friend if he is pressurising you like this. Tell him that if he wants to still be friends then he better stop bothering you like this or you will cut off contact with him and Mean it!
Reply 10
Thanks evereyone for the advice, really appreciate it.
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