Hello and welcome to the UKs national emergency helpline. Due to government cuts, changes are being made to the way the emergency services are run. From now on the 999 service will mostly be automated. We are also typically very busy at any given time so to help us get to you as soon as possible, please listen to all of the following options carefully before choosing:
Press 1 if your about to be, or are currently being murdered
Press 2 if your being mugged or robbed at gun point
Press 3 if your house or shed is being burgled
Press 4 if your having a stroke or heart attack
Press 5 if your drowning
Press 6 if you believe you have been bitten by something venemous
Press 7 if you have been bitten by a shark
Press 8 if you have been involved in a mountain biking or climbing accident
Press 9 if you have found a terrorist
Press 10 if your currently unconscious
For all other emergencies, or to speak to a trained operator scream HELP after you here the tone.
*Please note; lines are open Monday to Thursday between 06:00-17:00 and Friday between 07:00 -12:30.
You're through to 999
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Last edited by Laomedeia; 11-10-2016 at 00:33.Post rating:1
- 11-10-2016 00:30
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- 11-10-2016 00:44
For the love of god...
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- 11-10-2016 00:45
All of 'em. Shame it's a Saturday. Oh, btw, shall I do it? Yh, probably best... "HELP!"