Catholicism vs. Towels - The ultimate discussion

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roseonthegrave
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Which is best?

EDIT: See the broadsheet discussion for explanation. Of sorts.
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Acaila
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Go towels! (I've got a zebra print one ).
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roseonthegrave
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(Original post by Acaila)
Go towels! (I've got a zebra print one ).
To my eternal shame I have one imprinted with the timless bust of Donald Duck... But way to go with the gnarley zebra, I'd take it over mine any day!!
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BloodyValentine
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The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy has a few things to say on the subject of towels.
A towel, it says, is about the most massively useful thing an intersteller hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value. You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapors; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a miniraft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (a mind-bogglingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you -- daft as a brush, but very very ravenous); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.
More importantly, a towel has immense psychological value. For some reason, if a strag (strag: nonhitchhiker) discovers that a hitchhiker has his towel with him, he will automatically assume that he is also in possession of a toothbrush, washcloth, soap, tin of biscuits, flask, compass, map, ball of string, gnat spray, wet-weather gear, space suit etc., etc. Furthermore, the strag will then happily lend the hitchhiker any of these or a dozen other items that the might accidentally have "lost." What the strag will think is that any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the Galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through and still know where his towle is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with.
Hence, a phrase that has passed into hitchhiking slang, as in "Hey, you sass that hoopy Ford Prefect? There's a frood who really knows where his towel is." (Sass: know, be aware of, meet, have sex with; hoopy: really together guy; frood: really amazingly together guy.)

Which is why i voted for towels, another thing you can do with towels is whip catholics!!!!
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roseonthegrave
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(Original post by BloodyValentine)
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy has a few things to say on the subject of towels.
A towel, it says, is about the most massively useful thing an intersteller hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value. You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapors; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a miniraft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (a mind-bogglingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you -- daft as a brush, but very very ravenous); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.
More importantly, a towel has immense psychological value. For some reason, if a strag (strag: nonhitchhiker) discovers that a hitchhiker has his towel with him, he will automatically assume that he is also in possession of a toothbrush, washcloth, soap, tin of biscuits, flask, compass, map, ball of string, gnat spray, wet-weather gear, space suit etc., etc. Furthermore, the strag will then happily lend the hitchhiker any of these or a dozen other items that the might accidentally have "lost." What the strag will think is that any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the Galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through and still know where his towle is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with.
Hence, a phrase that has passed into hitchhiking slang, as in "Hey, you sass that hoopy Ford Prefect? There's a frood who really knows where his towel is." (Sass: know, be aware of, meet, have sex with; hoopy: really together guy; frood: really amazingly together guy.)

Which is why i voted for towels, another thing you can do with towels is whip catholics!!!!
Have you read the "Trilogy of Five" then?
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BloodyValentine
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(Original post by roseonthegrave)
Have you read the "Trilogy of Five" then?
yep and the salmon of doubt which is brilliant and the dirk gently books which aren't so good. sad douglas adams obsessive
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roseonthegrave
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(Original post by BloodyValentine)
yep and the salmon of doubt which is brilliant and the dirk gently books which aren't so good. sad douglas adams obsessive
Good ol' Doug, God rest his soul...
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Acaila
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(Original post by roseonthegrave)
To my eternal shame I have one imprinted with the timless bust of Donald Duck... But way to go with the gnarley zebra, I'd take it over mine any day!!
Oh I have a minnie mouse one
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roseonthegrave
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(Original post by Acaila)
Oh I have a minnie mouse one
Gotta love Disney lol
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Pzyko
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I don't want anyone thinking I like towels here. I just dislike Catholicism.
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BloodyValentine
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(Original post by roseonthegrave)
Good ol' Doug, God rest his soul...
I have to say even his death was amusing, dying on an exercise bike has a certain irony to it
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Chubb
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Haha. 8-0 to the towels! Go towels. Go towels. Go tow...
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Chubb
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(Original post by roseonthegrave)
Have you read the "Trilogy of Five" then?
Its the trilogy of four isn't it.
P.S I've read it and its amazing.
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roseonthegrave
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(Original post by Chubb)
Its the trilogy of four isn't it.
P.S I've read it and its amazing.
http://www.geocities.com/southbeach/surf/6818/book.html

Nope, you missed "Mostly Harmless" - the last book!!
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BloodyValentine
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(Original post by Chubb)
Its the trilogy of four isn't it.
P.S I've read it and its amazing.
nah there's so long and thanks for all the fish but they don't usually stock that in book stores
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BloodyValentine
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(Original post by roseonthegrave)
http://www.geocities.com/southbeach/surf/6818/book.html

Nope, you missed "Mostly Harmless" - the last book!!
that's what i meant to say
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flyinghorse
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What about Ned Flanders' Turin Shroud Beach Towel?
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Chubb
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(Original post by BloodyValentine)
that's what i meant to say
OMG - I've missed one!!! Oh this is great - now I can read another one.

EDIT - Who wants to start a Hichickers guide to UKL where we discuss the book?
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roseonthegrave
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(Original post by Chubb)
OMG - I've missed one!!! Oh this is great - now I can read another one.
The ending might make you sad.
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BloodyValentine
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yeah none of them quite live up to the first 2 books in my opinion though the story is still good it's not quite to the standard of Hitchhiker's Guide and the restaurant at the end of the universe
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