Hmmmmmmmm...

I'm worried. I'm an 18 year old girl and I've never had a boyfriend. I've kissed lots of guys at school, in clubs, had a "mini relationship" that lasted only a month...I called it off. We only got as far as kissing. eh, actually, one date. And I hated holding hands with him...it made me feel inadaquate somehow, like I was weak, or unattractive...similarly with cuddling. :frown:

Whenever a guy seems to want to actually get into a relationship with me, I bolt. I recently started working in a new part time job, and got invited on a work night out. There was one gut there who I'd fancied SO MUCH since I got my job...and I pulled him. I was delighted! But since then, I have gone off him, completely. this is absolutely typical behaviour; I turn my back on perfectly decent guys, attractive guys that like me. :confused:

Whats wrong with me???! I'm definately attracted to men, so thats not the issue. I'm confident, I'm a conversationalist, I'm clever, I'm attractive...I find it very difficult to objectively judge how "good looking" I am; but lots of people have told me I'm very pretty, and guys give me plenty if positive attention...I love flirting!
I know this sounds as though I really shouldn't have a problem - (I'm not arrogant btw - only trying to be honest and objective) -

BUT I DO HAVE A PROBLEM!!! I can't get a boyfriend!!!!!

Cheers for reading that...if anyone can help/has any idea what my problem is/is the same as me, I would really appreciate hearning your thoughts!

Also, may I ask the GUYS - would you be turned off going out with a girl of my age, in my situation - ie. who seems "normal" (well, no ones "normal" really!!), but who has very little sexual experience? Or would you assume there must be something a bit strange because nobody else wants me? :redface:

Reply 1

Ang|ophi|e

Stop looking for a reason to bolt. Give relationships a chance. Also change your attitude about hand holding and cuddling. It doesn't mean anything bad but rather a way of expressing feelings for another person. Since you take it in a bad way you're giving guys signals that you don't like them. Be open and don't be afraid of commitment. There's nothing wrong it. :smile:

Reply 2

nanananabatman

But you're only 18! I didn't go out with anyone till around that age and found it weird that 14 year olds around me had boyfriends!

Reply 3

molly_beatler

yeah I know what you mean...glad I haven't grown up too fast and all...BUT everyone else around me has all had boyfriends/girlfriends from early ages! I'm the odd one out :frown:

Reply 4

supernova2

And whose fault is that?!?! Be happy kowing that if you really wanted and if you didnt just be stupid you could easily have a nice decent boyfriend by now. Feel sorry for the stupid ugly fat peopel who cant get any kind of relationship because nobody wants to be seen with them!

Reply 5

coldplasma

molly_beatler

Whats wrong with me???! I'm confident, I'm a conversationalist, I'm clever, I'm attractive.

Well, you could start by deflating your head a little bit...

Reply 6

orbelina

Maybe on some level you dont feel ready for a serious relationship right now? You say you go off decent guys who are interested in you, perhaps its because none of them have been quite *right* for you, and you enjoy the freedom of being able to flirt too much to sacrifice that. Really, there is no point putting pressure on yourself to get a boyfriend, you dont need to, just wait till you meet someone you really like rather than forcing it.