I can't take it any more. When I was a teenager she pushed me so hard that I attempted suicide because of her. My whole life she's forced me into far too many things that I didn't want to do. In school I had to learn multiple instruments, be in multiple spots teams and dance lessons, extra school tuition even though I was passing, Saturday school, non-school exams, summer camps, I had no social life.
Because of that I've had anxiety attacks from so much stress going on during school, I was falling asleep in classes, crying all the time, started smoking and tried to kill myself when she wouldn't listen to me and kept forcing me into things against my will. She was manipulative.
I moved away for uni. Our relationship got better then, but now that I've graduated I've had to come back home temporarily and she's treating me the same way all over again. If she catches me just sitting on my computer she spam-emails me with job links, even though I already have a job, she wants me to have at least two. She's telling me I'll never do well in life if I don't do this, do things her way, telling me I never listen to her, telling me I need to join these societies and orchestras or she'll take away so-and-so. It's bullying. I'm trying my hardest to find a job with enough money to move away, but while I'm here, she just cannot listen to me. She'll do this thing when she asks me a question, I answer, and she asks it again just because she didn't get the answer she wants. e.g. "Have you learned the flute yet?- No I'll practice soon- .... Have you learned the flute yet?" It's just crazy how much she's expecting me to do instantly when I'm busy.
She's now even trying to control my relationship. It's my first ever relationship and she's telling me to break up with him, saying he holds me back, that he's stopping me from concentrating, it's insane. He's wonderful and I want to spend my life with him without her belittling him and I.
I don't know what I can do. I have no choice but to live with her for now, and have to keep some relationship with her or I'd be broke and homeless. Has anyone else dealt with this and have any advice what I can say to her? She knows I depend on her, which is why I can't tell her to back off out of my life or she'll take away everything I have. She thinks I owe her and that she's in control of me because of that.
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