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Left out by friends- should I ask why? watch

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    Hey,

    So some context: I have a close knit group of friends that I've known since birth. We all live near each other, except for one guy who now lives in Glasgow. If one or two of us are around, we normally hang out with each other. When the friend from Glasgow is back, we normally all make an effort to get together.

    So I woke up this morning to see a Facebook post from one friend that suggested the other four spent the evening hanging out together, which has left me feeling left out and a bit disappointed. I can't see any logical reason as to why I would have got left out, but at the same time I can't see how they would have forgot to have sent me an invite.

    Anyway, it's left me feeling a bit crap tbh. Especially since I had nothing planned for Saturday and did nothing! I did hang out with them in a wider group on Friday night for a friends birthday.

    Should I ask one of them why I wasn't invited, or would that make things more awkward than they need to be?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hey,

    So some context: I have a close knit group of friends that I've known since birth. We all live near each other, except for one guy who now lives in Glasgow. If one or two of us are around, we normally hang out with each other. When the friend from Glasgow is back, we normally all make an effort to get together.

    So I woke up this morning to see a Facebook post from one friend that suggested the other four spent the evening hanging out together, which has left me feeling left out and a bit disappointed. I can't see any logical reason as to why I would have got left out, but at the same time I can't see how they would have forgot to have sent me an invite.

    Anyway, it's left me feeling a bit crap tbh. Especially since I had nothing planned for Saturday and did nothing! I did hang out with them in a wider group on Friday night for a friends birthday.

    Should I ask one of them why I wasn't invited, or would that make things more awkward than they need to be?
    Just ask them. It shouldn't make things awkward. Maybe they thought that you would be too tired after the birthday on Friday?

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    (Original post by Edminzodo)
    Just ask them. It shouldn't make things awkward. Maybe they thought that you would be too tired after the birthday on Friday?

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    Thanks for the response.

    That wouldn't be it though, as they know I don't get like that, and they were all out as well. Last night wasn't a night out either, it wasn't just chilling at my friends.

    It's an odd one as these are my guys, you know?

    I was thinking of sending a whatsapp message to our group and asking something like 'justness wondering what's happened to my invite last night'? Or would that be a bit of a **** move?
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    (Original post by Edminzodo)
    Just ask them. It shouldn't make things awkward. Maybe they thought that you would be too tired after the birthday on Friday?

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Thanks for the response.

    That wouldn't be it though, as they know I don't get like that, and they were all out as well. Last night wasn't a night out either, it wasn't just chilling at my friends.

    It's an odd one as these are my guys, you know?

    I was thinking of sending a whatsapp message to our group and asking something like 'justness wondering what's happened to my invite last night'? Or would that be a bit of a **** move?
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    Also it's worth adding that nearly everything we arrange is last minute, so it can't be that reason. We all live a 5 min car journey from each other, or a 10-30 min walk.
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    Does anyone else have any word s of wisdom before I send this message? Love to hear some more thoughts before I do.

    It won't make this too awkward between us will it?
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    I think this can be delicate question, since it puts people on the spot. Friendship groups do narrow and widen who is invited at times and I think this can be reasonable and without hurtful intent. Perhaps social media makes things worse by making everything people do public. I would follow your instincts about whether to explore this with one for the friends or to just go with it and see what happens in the future.
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    Just ask them if they did something last night - be like 'guys how come you did something yesterday?"
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    (Original post by Zarek)
    I think this can be delicate question, since it puts people on the spot. Friendship groups do narrow and widen who is invited at times and I think this can be reasonable and without hurtful intent. Perhaps social media makes things worse by making everything people do public. I would follow your instincts about whether to explore this with one for the friends or to just go with it and see what happens in the future.
    I get the friendship groups change thing...but I mean we are all 24 now. We've all been through a lot together, and we are solid, solid mates. When we are busy for example as a group, one or two in the group will get together to hang out. This is the kinda group where when/if we all get married, we'll be each other's best men and ushers.

    But yeah wish I just didn't know. Was a shame to see it on FB. I actually spoke with a friend briefly today, with other people, and one of them asked how his weekend wasn't and he said he has hung out with our group. Soon as he said it, he gave me a 'oh crap' look and changed the subject. Couldn't ask him there's and then with others around.
 
 
 
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