Turn on thread page Beta
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Im 22 and Ive been with my girlfriend for over 3 years. I met her in the first year of university and have been with her ever since, meaning she is the only girl I have had ever had a serious or semi-serious (ie. non-high school) relationship with and had sex with.

    Now, I really think that people should experience things and life in general - part of young life is having a new experiences. Its quite hard to communicate what I mean here exactly without sounding like Im trying to justify cheating on my girlfriend. Meeting a girl for the first time, dating and getting to know her is fun and exciting even if ultimately 3 months down the line you realise your wrong for each other. I cant express enough how much I am not bothered about having sex with other women - I just feel that I want to experience that new relationship feeling more than once.

    The friends I have explained this too basically come back with one of two responses. Some dont understand what Im trying to say because they arent the relationship type; the majority understand what I mean and feel the same (since a lot of my friends are in 2+yr relationships) but just suggest cheating on my girlfriend. I love my girlfriend - im not going to cheat on her.

    Things have come to a head within the last 2 months or so. In some ways I wish Id have met my current girlfriend at a later point in my life when Im ready to have kids and whatknot. Ive felt like this for a while and am becoming increasing resentful towards my girlfriend (and im aware thats not her fault). I recently met a girl that I had a great time talking to and exchanged numbers with her. Are my only realistic options to just forget the part of life Ive missed out on and stay with my girlfriend - or decide to break up with her?
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    no you shouldnt really miss out on that part of your life if it means alot to you, you only live once after all... if you really feel strongly about wanting to see what being in a new relationship would be like then you should tell your girlfriend how you're feeling and ultimately break up with her I suppose... either way you should tell you're girlfriend how you are feeling she's probably noticed that something's up so it would be best to have it all out in the open
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    i think you should think very, very carefully about whether it's worth ending a 3 year relationship (with assumedly a lot of love and good times along the way?) to experience trying to get another one. or at least see what it's like with another girl. chances are it's not going to be anywhere near as deep and meaningful and special as what you have now.

    i personally couldn't end something that special to me just to be free to play the field. but maybe something IS missing in your relationship to feel that you need something from it you can only get elsewhere.

    to me it sounds like a foolish thing to do, but probably for the best to break up with her. if you're starting to resent her and don't wanna be with her over any other woman she probably deserves better. or at least someone who is at the right stage of life to not wanna sow their oats.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    its probably one of those 'grass is always greener on the other side' things lol
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    It sounds like you're bored. If you're lacking spark or whatnot then you need to weigh up what is more important - playng the field, or staying with the girl you love. Perhaps you both need a break. This isnt easy and there will be doubts and crying and stuff but sometimes you need to step back out if the dance to see the dancers. If you know what I mean.

    Let me tell you this. If you're looking for the thrill of the chase, you will get this with the new girl. However, it will go away again once you get familiar with the new girl. You ave to decide if you having the thrill of the chase is better than the gf you love.

    Good luck.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I'm in the same kind of situation, and I suggest you discuss it with your girlfriend because its really likely that she's feeling the same way. I have talked about it with my boyfriend and although he doesn't feel the same way we at least have it out in the open, and it hasn't done our relationship any harm.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    I think you should try talking to your girlfriend about how you're feeling and perhaps you could come up with some ways to make things interesting again. I don't think cheating would do you any good, because she will get hurt and it's obvious you don't want to do that.

    You've opted for the extremes in this situation and if you try to forget the part of the life you feel you've missed out on, you will start to resent both it and your girlfriend. Maybe try a break in your relationship for a while, just don't take it the Friends way.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Saying that, the friends way did work out in the end...
    Offline

    10
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Im 22 and Ive been with my girlfriend for over 3 years. I met her in the first year of university and have been with her ever since, meaning she is the only girl I have had ever had a serious or semi-serious (ie. non-high school) relationship with and had sex with.

    Now, I really think that people should experience things and life in general - part of young life is having a new experiences. Its quite hard to communicate what I mean here exactly without sounding like Im trying to justify cheating on my girlfriend. Meeting a girl for the first time, dating and getting to know her is fun and exciting even if ultimately 3 months down the line you realise your wrong for each other. I cant express enough how much I am not bothered about having sex with other women - I just feel that I want to experience that new relationship feeling more than once.

    The friends I have explained this too basically come back with one of two responses. Some dont understand what Im trying to say because they arent the relationship type; the majority understand what I mean and feel the same (since a lot of my friends are in 2+yr relationships) but just suggest cheating on my girlfriend. I love my girlfriend - im not going to cheat on her.

    Things have come to a head within the last 2 months or so. In some ways I wish Id have met my current girlfriend at a later point in my life when Im ready to have kids and whatknot. Ive felt like this for a while and am becoming increasing resentful towards my girlfriend (and im aware thats not her fault). I recently met a girl that I had a great time talking to and exchanged numbers with her. Are my only realistic options to just forget the part of life Ive missed out on and stay with my girlfriend - or decide to break up with her?
    break up now, rather than later down the line, when you start thinking about other girls more often - its unfair to your girlfriend (but dont say this to her when u break up of course).
 
 
 
Poll
The new Gillette ad. Is it:

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.