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Does everyone feel this in a long term relationship? watch

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    You reach a sexual plateau where you both enjoy having sex, but it isn't as 'enjoyable' as it once was?

    I think maybe you become acclimatised to each other's bodies that you just don't have that level of mind-blowing sex. Or perhaps you become settled into the mundane routine of getting your 'rocks off' too quickly and its over before you've really started.

    I love my partner very much, but sometimes it feels a bit like she doesn't enjoy it as much as she once did. I've brought it up, and she kind of just accepts it as normal and kind of dismisses it as a natural thing and that its an unnecessary concern.

    Obviously between each individual and particularly women, what matters to each other is different to another. Different values of what is important in a relationship.

    What do you think?

    Does everyone else feel like an old grumpy married couple after a few years? it isn't as exciting perhaps? Becomes more about the deeper emotions than the raw wild sex you used to have?
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    Yep, what you're experiencing is quite normal. I think your girlfriend telling you not to worry is the correct advice. Girls especially don't need the earth shattering sex like the guys do. Girls do enjoy it but after a while she doesn't need it to be mind blowing to enjoy it. The simple act of intimacy is fulfilling enough. Also, girls can't just tune out the outside world and the rest of her day even when it comes to sex. If she's had a tough day at the office or an upcoming exam she's stressed about she can't just turn those thoughts off - and apparently guys can - when it comes to sex, she's still caring that stress in her mind. It doesn't mean you're not desirable anymore its just that the relationship is evolving and it does become more 'comfortable'. You definitely need to communicate what your needs are as well..... you get to have your needs met too. If you can't reach a place where you are both comfortable and fulfilled the you need evaluate if you want to continue. Hopefully, that won't be the case. Believe me - she can be crazy in love, definitely a deeper emotional connection and not feel like she has to have raw passionate sex to be very satisfied sexually and emotionally. Now you have to decide what you need and if you two can match your needs up. Good Luck!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You reach a sexual plateau where you both enjoy having sex, but it isn't as 'enjoyable' as it once was?

    I think maybe you become acclimatised to each other's bodies that you just don't have that level of mind-blowing sex. Or perhaps you become settled into the mundane routine of getting your 'rocks off' too quickly and its over before you've really started.

    I love my partner very much, but sometimes it feels a bit like she doesn't enjoy it as much as she once did. I've brought it up, and she kind of just accepts it as normal and kind of dismisses it as a natural thing and that its an unnecessary concern.

    Obviously between each individual and particularly women, what matters to each other is different to another. Different values of what is important in a relationship.

    What do you think?

    Does everyone else feel like an old grumpy married couple after a few years? it isn't as exciting perhaps? Becomes more about the deeper emotions than the raw wild sex you used to have?
    Been married three years, still have awesome sex.

    I think a lot of people end up like you but I don't think it's a certain. Have you tried mixing stuff up a bit? Maybe look at certain websites that sell goods which may help you experiment more? Most importantly however, talk to your girlfriend; I know you said you did but I'd say to do it again. Try asking if she has any fantasies or wants to try doing something different - try looking online and suggesting/showing her these new things.

    The above poster mentioned that your gf might be carrying a lot of stress so maybe try making things special for her. Do something you rarely/never do to help get her in the mood. The problem woth long relationships is that both sides are comfortable and so things like romantic gestures can get rarer; try bringing that back. You need to make an effort if you want to break this cycle.


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    Do different things. There's lots of experimentation you can have with sex.

    Do sex spontaneously and unplanned as much as possible.

    If you do just accept a routine and get stuck in it then obviously sex will cease to be as thrilling as it was once before - taht applies to all things good. Being rich would be amazing for the first week, but after 10 years probably seems pretty meh.
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    Human beings get bored. :/ It bothers me sometimes, thinking about it.

    My suggestion would be to spend some time apart. Don't constantly be near each other.
 
 
 
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